that irritable threads should have a flag that indicates to posters of a trivial disposition that this is not the the place for humour?

[OrmRenewed]

Perhaps a coloured icon that changes colour from green to red by registering the numbers of 'feck offs' and 'FFS!!' that occur.

I tend to dive in with a joke and then feel like I've burst into a room with a fart joke only to find that there is nasty domestic spat going on.

Er? Am I being dim? Made no sense to me

I sniggered a little at MaMight's farting in the bath joke

When DD2 was just 3, I was taking her upstairs to bed and she suffered a very loud episode of flatulence at the top of the stairs (DH was in the livingroom laughing, it was so loud). I said in a mock-shocked voice 'DD2! Did you pop?' To which she said

'No Mummy, I FARTED!!'

I likes cider, cider makes me fart.

And when I fart I smells, and when I smells people pays me money to go away, and with that money I buys more cider, so I likes cider, cider makes me fart.

( all said in obligatory west country accent )

knock knock

who's there?

Dunnup

Dunnup who?

That was my sister's favourite joke from the age of 5 until....well probably still is.

How can you tell when a lady wearing tights farts ?

Her ankles swell up.

Courtesy of DD

That is a fine joke.

Fantastic joke!

[wanders off to track down some barneys...]

Lovin these fart/poo jokes. Will keep watching this thread for more even though it's totally gone off OP!!!

What we need now is for someone to burst in with a nasty domestic spat.

She also has a naughty one but it involves being potentially offensive so I'd better not

I got it! I got it!

The bath joke.

made me giggle inappropriately and people looked at!

i don't get it

It is a joke that works better if you hear it.
If you say the thing the guy thought he heard very fast and kind of blended it sounds like a bubbly noise ie farts in a bath.

A bit of humour is a wonderful thing. I'm not keen on just general ninnies though who turn up after 600 posts of, erm, intellectual debates and say "FFS you wankers, every1 knows Katie Price is a fantastic businesswoman and that ur hubbies wud luv to shag her- that ur problem, innit lol".

Then you get Nevermissachancetoslagoffthe LabourParty.

Then you get the "My dh is just a little bemused by all the fuss and only wants to play golf".

Then you get "I'm a catholic and the bible says you're all deviants"

Etc etc etc

And you realise that you have completely wasted an entire day of your life on a thread that jumped the shark before lunchtime yesterday, but keeps...sucking...you...back...in.

No more. Shall try to stick to fart joke threads, much easier

Dunnup who = done a poo

dearie dearie me.

Dunna poo!! (Dunno who)

ROFL
and had explained the wrong joke to Riven...

The dunnup who

done-a-pooh

orm, tell! I can't get it at all, what's it mean?? [fick] emoticon

done a poo Riven

I still don't understand the waterbottle

[fick]

This isn't a fart joke, but it is Benny Hill:

What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

I don't know how to make an en zyme but I know how to make ....(say it for yourself).

Have I managed to lower the tone of a fart joke thread?

I have learnt to ignore anyone who uses lol after saying something that is not vaguely funny...
'hangings to good for them lol'

It is like a dipshitometer