To shout at someone parking parent & child space with NO CHILD IN CAR

[ElleBing]

Right, sorry for the incoming rant but I am STILL furious about this...

Pulled up in supermarket carpark yesterday with DS and 6 month old niece in back of car. It's pouring with rain so I pull into the parent/child bay looking for a space. There's one in sight so I drive towards it only to be beaten by a big, fat BMW driving against the one-way system! "Oh well" I think and go to drive off UNTIL a couple with no kid get out of the car. I did get angry straight away. Why the fuck should the LOs get soaked because they're too lazy to park elsewhere? I wound my window down and said "you do know you're supposed to have a child to park in parent and child?" the woman leaned in really aggressively telling me that her son was inside the supermarket with his grandma (wtf?) So I let it go...

Half an hour later, I'm pushing LOs round in trolley when I see that couple, with no kid. She knew I'd seen but I didn't say anything. Next thing I know, I'm looking at the baking potatoes and the deranged cunt is shoving her mobile phone in my face showing me a picture of her DS. "THAT'S MY SON!" I was like "And? I've got a picture of my disabled MIL on MY phone. Doesn't mean I'd park in a disabled space without her in the car!" The she started trying to intimidate me (she was a lot bigger than me) by towering over me repeatedly saying "DON'T question ME" Who the fuck does she think she is? I could feel myself getting to boiling point so I very calmly told her to fuck off (don't think LOs heard!) and walked off.

I am STILL angry about this today. AIBU? If I'd been caught out doing something like that, I'd think "fair enough" and move on, NOT start verbally attacking the person who caught me out. I felt like telling her that she could use the extra walk from the normal spaces to shift some fat off her arse but that would just be puerile, wouldn't it?

I think you both sound slightly unhinged...

"c-bomb"

LOL did you get that by any chance from that programme where the moody teen went to the family in alabama and the dad said 'we dont the f bomb in this home"

sorry , just love that phrase!!!

in defence of the OP she did not confront the woman, the woman came to her and started it!

The 'baby won't dissolve' line is used frequently on these threads. I know where people are coming from and why they are indignant, but...

My baby got wet when he had a cold once. We'd been on a walk in November and the weather was bad. We had to walk because of various circumstances. The cold just seemed very mild, so I didn't think anything of it.

Fast forward a night and we are on the children's ward and he has been x-rayed again because he is declining rapidly and they don't know why. Pneumonia. Very virulent, very dangerous. Caused, they think, from the walk in the bad weather on top of a cold. Perhaps, perhaps not. But I have to live with that knowledge. After the pneumonia my son developed bronchiolitis and asthma. His lungs gave him a lot of trouble but are now thankfully much better.

Healthy babies may not 'dissolve' but you don't know whose baby might already be poorly. And that may be why a mother is anxious about not letting them get too damp.
Sometimes we have to take sick babies out if we need essential food items.

However did our own mothers cope?

"c-bomb" actually came from CNN - which was covering Joe Biden dropping the "f-bomb" during the health care press conference!

A woman in a 2 seater sports car parked in a P&B space in our shopping center, I arrived at the same time as her, and when I left a couple of hours later her car was still there, so its not even that she just had to pop in quickly.
She just thought she would take a spce right next to the door. The spaces in this carpark are very tight so getting 2 children in and out is tricky.
It annoyed me as she had a tiny car that she could have parked anywhere.

I left a "friendly" note on her windscreen.

I know its not a right, but it really does bug me!

I get annoyed when people disregard rules in general. Whether its parking on the pavement, running a red light, parking in a M&T with no kids, not holding a door open for the person behind.

If we don;t follow the rules then society becomes a less pleasant place for everyone. And you can bet that people who disregard M&T space rules feel they are too important to adhere to other ones as well.

Ooo - I love a heated "debate"!!

Guess the language maybe getting a tad out of hand though!

I DO agree it's worth getting annoyed about though - I had a C-section & it was bloody hard work getting DD out of car set & lifting her onto the trolley - needed plenty of space.

Same thing happened to me - big fat bloke in top range Merc parked in parent & child places (inspite of there being a free disabled space NEARER to Tescos!!).

Feeling brave (& v happy to be a mummy after 7 years of ttc & 6 lots of ivf, lol!) I confronted him & his wife.

Cheeky old git claimed to have had 4 heart attacks - felt like saying, he prob shouldn't be driving then & the extra few yards would shift some of his gut!

Didn't want him to have another heartattack so just said "People like you are what's wrong with this country - you are just SELFISH and greedy"!!! & Stomped off.

When I came back I had a look for his disabled badge & the cheeky git DIDN'T have one!!! Grrr!!!!

But I felt better - cos I was RIGHT, lol!!! (Also, his poor wife looked pretty mortified - especially when I ranted about having had a c-section, & it being so hard to lift the car seat!!)

Time for P&T spaces to be phased out. They are not necessary and it would put an end to these threads!

why are people making such a fuss about children getting wet? Get a brolly or a cover for your pram. You can even get magically water proof clothing and hats these days.

Disabled spaces are there for people who physically find it difficult to move about. Parent and child spaces are a marketing ploy, nothing more. They are not a legal or even moral right.

Get over it.

And quite frankly, equating parent and child spaces with disabled spaces is insulting to those who have genuine disability.

The C-word (yes, I know, I am a Victoriana prude) said repeatedly really puts me off feeling sympathy for people to be honest.

Unfortunately as M&B spaces are just a courtesy and not a right legally etc they can't really be enforced, so without a little righteous indignation you don't really have anywhere to go with this.

I wouldn't have gotten into it like this personally, I might have mentioned it to them politely but certainly without 'tone' and I certainly would have just raised an eyebrow at her and walked off in the store. I certainly wouldn't have gotten into it in front of children. But that's just me!

Meant to add that disabled spaces are a totally different kettle of fish. I would, and have, mentioned to people that their blue badge didn't seem to be 'visible'...

Maybe you were a bit over the top, you need to be careful when appraoching people about this.
A friend of mine told asked someone where her child was when a woman pulled into a parent and toddler parking space without children. The woman lashed out at my friend, pushed her car door into her back whilst she was getting her DC out of car and started attacking her.

Rather than increase your blood-pressure, console yourself that the reason why you park there is that you have a beautiful dc; they park there because they have an extra wide arse and an unpleasant disposition.

YABU and very undignified.

A BIG FAT BMW????? What has that got to do with it?
Are you a bit envious perhaps?

I must admit to doing some serious 'glowering' in my time at people parking in these spaces without kids, but, as has been said, it's not actually legally enforcable so the most that you can accuse them of is being unthoughtful.

I think the 'dissolving babies' argument is a bit of a red herring actually - as far as I understand it, the spaces are wider because you physically need more space to get babies and toddlers in and out of the seats. I'm quite happy to park in a normal space, and frequently do, but unfortunately can't always guarantee that I can get my kids in and out without pranging someone elses car - not deliberate, just unavoidable. Also really hate having to keep dragging my DS2 and DD3 away from cars that often go careering by very fast, as there is no room for them to stand safely.

I'm sure if it were put to people on that basis, rather than us being a bunch of precious 'yummy mummys' (really hate that phrase!)other drivers would be more understanding - I don't think anyone wants to see their car scratched or damaged by us baby wranglers, or more importantly, see a baby/toddler get accidently hit. And I have to say that the majority of 'offenders' really do seem to be people driving either very large and/or expensive sports models!

Agree that the spaces can be anywhere in the car park - it's the assumption that we need them right by the door that makes all the (negative)difference, I think.

If you have more than one child to get into the trolley seat, you really do need a wide space so that you can put the trolly next to the car.
I once had to ask a total stranger for help when there were no P&C spaces left and I had 3 foster children.
It's not a right but it is there to help the parents of small children NOT lazy idiots who can't be bothered to walk the extra 20 yards.
I don't use P&C spaces now mine are older and don't sit in the trolley any more.

YANBU!
Last weekend I was in Sainsbury's and there were hardly any parking spaces anywhere.

And 3, yes THREE parent and child spaces were taken up by a demonstration stall for Sharwooods curry sauces! They had a tent, were giving out free curry, but they had no children or toddlers on the stall.

How dare anyone without children take up so many spaces? A chicken jalfrezi shouldn't need specialist spaces.

I will never eat curry again.

I agree that they don't have to be by the door too... as long as they are wide.

Dinah

Oh here we go again, it seems we cannot discuss this without blue badge spaces coming up. This isn't about blue badge spaces, no one mentioned them. Yes we'd survive without them, yes our parents coped, no the baby won't dissolve. But if the spaces are there for the convenience of a particular group of people, why are we not allowed to be annoyed (ok, maybe not as worked up as some) at people using them who aren't entitled? That's just a cop out for letting people do exactly as they want, and that way anarchy lies.

ImSoNotTelling has it.

"I get annoyed when people disregard rules in general. Whether its parking on the pavement, running a red light, parking in a M&T with no kids, not holding a door open for the person behind.

If we don;t follow the rules then society becomes a less pleasant place for everyone. And you can bet that people who disregard M&T space rules feel they are too important to adhere to other ones as well."

cornsilk - 'how did our mothers cope'?

they didn't have to use car seats! I remember sitting in the back of my dads car when I was wee - with no car seat and no seat belt as the car wasn't designed with seatbelts in the back. And that was only 20 years ago.

YANBU

The OP mentioned disabled spaces Rockbird.

'And? I've got a picture of my disabled MIL on MY phone. Doesn't mean I'd park in a disabled space without her in the car!"'

She may not have intended for them to be a topic of discussion but she did mention them.