to have been slightly disapproving of the lyrics of literally ALL the songs sung in DD's mother's day assembly today?

[HerBeatitude]

They were all about how mummies clean and cook, and wash our clothes and tidy up and change our beds and pack our lunches and bring us to school....

And I thought FFS I know for a fact that many of us sitting here do a fark of a lot more than that, and couldn't you have worked some of the other, less gender stereotyped stuff in?

And I also thought, FFS sometimes some of the Daddies even do all that.

Is it just me who thinks that in 2010, schools could be making a leetle more of an effort to point out to children that mummies aren't just there to service the household?

Nothing low about my aspirations, i aspire to be the best mum i possibly can - ive done everything else and have the T shirt - degree, phd, jobs - being a mum is the best and toughest job ive had - i find it insulting that you feel that aspiring to be just a mum is not good enough!

oh FFS will you stop missing the point. Cooking cleaning and laundry is not being a mum. I did all that for years before I became a mum.

I'm not saying they should have songs about going to work, sacking people or doing the accounts - just things like hugs, reading stories, playing etc., would do - it's gender neutral and it is actually the stuff that kids remember when they get older. They don't remember that you cleaned their clothes, they remember how you made them feel.

We do educate your children, HerBeatitude; we teach them to be bloody thankful and gracious - qualities which, in your case, seem to be sadly lacking.

My ds came home with a beautiful card which said 'I love my Mummy because she makes me chicken casserole and green beans'.
Am I about to rush in to nursery and berate them for not steering my son towards my greater feminist attributes? Perhaps I should make them point out my degree to him, or the fact that I work full time as a primary school teacher. After all, those things are a bilion times more important. Except they aren't to my 4 year old ds, are they?

I cannot believe you are still banging on about this.

I'm still banging on about it because everyone else is.

As long as everyone keeps coming on and telling me that mothering is all about laundry and I ought to be grateful that my DD's school is telling her that, I'll carry on.

HTH.

Your dd's school didn't tell her that mothering was all about laundry. They suggested commmon motherly things she may like to thank you for.

bullshit they are not motherly, they are domestic work. Anyone can do them, you don't have to be a mother.

I think I may have already mentioned that point oh at least three times, but people keep ignoring it, claiming that domestic work is mothering and then getting annoyed with me because I keep gently pointing out that it's not...

It's part of lots of children's mothering. And it's still something to say thank you for.

I have no objection to them saying thank you for it. But it would have been nice if they could have found just one thing that didn't involve domestic labour, to say thank you for. Just one? Like hugging, tucking you up, kissing it better? Is it really so militant, so utterly unreasonable, to think that just one thing a child could say thank you for, would not be centred on domestic labour that anyone could do?

And also you have set off another thought. It's a bit odd, children thanking their parents for services rendered, isn't it? Should mothers day really be about thanking your mum, or just about remembering you love and appreciate her? Not sure if I want my dd's thanks, I don't bring her up so she'll be grateful.

No, it isn't at all odd to teach children to be thoughtful and not to take things for granted every now and again.

So is it terribly militant to think that they could have been grateful about something that didn't centre on domestic labour? Or do you just think that it's too difficult to find a rhyme for hug, or kiss?

HB, you've made many a sensible point and I'm afraid there'll always be people here who won't read a point well made because they skim the thread. Hopefully some other people may think a bit more in future about lazy stereotyping.

Good Morning HB . Have re-read the thread again and yes - you've made a sensible point if the assembly completely ignored things like Mums hugging you when you're sad and kissing a bruise to make it better. As you say - mothering is all about how a child experiences life when they need their Mum most.
I enjoyed my DS's Mothering assembly because he stood up with a picture he'd painted of me and shouted "I LOVE MY MUM". I don't recall particularly the content being about drudgery as such although Year 1 may have had a suspect song (a song which involved them wearing pinnies and using brooms - you'd have LOVED it).

I still don't think there's anything wrong in children thinking about what a Mum does and showing some appreciation (God knows it's not often they show such appreciation). So rather than bveing unreasonable which was my first thought I rather just think that you are overthinking it.

Now go and start that other thread

I think you are being utterly reasonable, and if the school my children go to did the same thing, I would complain.

My dd (age 3) comes home from nursery singing "Daddy's washing, Daddy's washing, scrub, scrub, scrub" then askes what colour clothes you're wearing and whether they need a wash. And complains about me (mum) going to work - where she believes that I play with a small red car all day ( a desk toy on one of the accountants' desk at the office...). In her world mummy does everything and songs at assembly aren't going to change much