Page 4 | to have been slightly disapproving of the lyrics of literally ALL the songs sung in DD's mother's day assembly today?

HerBeatitude · 2010-03-12T18:47:14+00:00

They were all about how mummies clean and cook, and wash our clothes and tidy up and change our beds and pack our lunches and bring us to school.... And I thought FFS I know for a fact that many of us sitting here do a fark of a lot more than that, and couldn't you have worked some of the other, less gender stereotyped stuff in? And I also thought, FFS sometimes some of the Daddies even do all that. Is it just me who thinks that in 2010, schools could be making a leetle more of an effort to point out to children that mummies aren't just there to service the household?

JustMoon · 15/03/2010 12:33

someone else can start btw

JulesJules · 15/03/2010 17:14

We could start with a haiku...

Mrsdoasyouwouldbedoneby · 15/03/2010 20:40

My DS's school did a Kenning... it was quite amusing... inaccurate tho, I think it had mothers as Chocolate sharers or something? Law givers, stern talkers, tear wipers... that sort of thing... Was very sweet!

Original poster

HerBeatitude · 15/03/2010 21:10

Chocolate sharers?

Oh I don't think so...

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SolidGoldBrass · 15/03/2010 21:53

I'd be pissed off with this as well. And am very glad that DS' school does no such thing as the ensuing family row would be a belter (DS' dad is a parent governer, so I would be kicking his arse to go and complain about sexist stereotyping and then saying I'd do it myself, DS dad would be telling me to pick my battles and not make a fuss about nothing etc and I would end up muttering furiously about never forgetting why we are NOT a couple and then yelling at him to wash up the next time he cooks DS tea...)

GrimmaTheNome · 15/03/2010 22:03

Blimey. Haven't read all the thread but at the 'She may not have a degree
but she helps me with my homework'. Mind you, DDs version would have been 'She may have 2 degrees but I still argue the toss when she tries to help me with my homework cos she doesn't do it the way teacher said'

mumutd · 15/03/2010 22:26

I prefer the reason why my son says he loves me (as written in the card he made me at school)

'you are special, I love you because you love me'

Says it all really

Mscombobulated · 15/03/2010 22:35

YABU - if they were to sing a song about daddies it would probbly say things like, mending my bike, playing football, etc etc. It is about what we directly do for our children. Im proud to do all of those things.

Our assembly was lovely, based on a book where monkeys were trying to find their mums in the jungle. It was about everyone being different and having different mummies - i thought it was lovely.

Its just what they see - they don't see what mums do at work. They see us making them dinner and nuturing them - why on earth wouldnt you want to celebrate that? it is possible to be an intelligent and fulfilled woman and be 100% into being a mum, working or otherwise. You are missing out on so much if you think that is beneath you

fallon8 · 15/03/2010 22:35

When one of my kids was smaller,he said,I did nothing,but she is a good cooker,take it for what it was, for Mothers Day. will they have a fathers day do?

Original poster

HerBeatitude · 16/03/2010 12:34

It's not a question of being "beneath me".

It's a question of the reactionary messages that the educators of our children are giving them. I'm just disappointed that this sort of lazy reactionary material isn't beneath the educators of the next generation. I wish they had higher aspirations.

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Mscombobulated · 16/03/2010 14:25

But what higher goal is there than nurturing our children? Really? I am educated to PhD level, i am a SAHM i have never felt so fulfilled. Im not saying that works for everyone - but for me, and many other working mums and DADS work is secondary to family and I am proud to be defined as a mother first and when i do go back to work, scientist second. Yeah the washing up is boring, the tidying does my head in, but there was plenty of things about my job bored me too.

Mother's day is about celebrating mother's and what they do for their children and therefore i think what you described was wholly appropriate. Of course there is more to being a mum than just that, there is providing and being a solid role model etc etc, but what we ALL share is nurturing our children, no matter what else we do.

And that, in forest gump stylee, is all i have to say about that

Original poster

HerBeatitude · 16/03/2010 14:33

But they weren't talking about nurturing our children Mscombobulated.

They were talking about housework. Cooking, cleaning, making sandwiches, laundry - you can do all that without being a mother.

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GrendelsMum · 16/03/2010 14:42

What about those mums who don't do housework? Aren't they proper mums? Don't they get to be sung about?

I think it sounds like an incredibly stupid song, and I don't think you're being at all unreasonable. I'm surprised the teachers could bring themselves to teach it, to be honest (assuming that they're mainly women?)

Mscombobulated · 16/03/2010 14:50

I disagree, i HATE housework and i am a messy cow, i certainly am not MS domesticated, but i love cooking for my family, and i actually LIKE doing the laundry - those things may seem trivial and to a certain degree they are, but those are the things that to our little ones, provide a bedrock of security. Of course it takes much much more to be a mummy, but i dont think the average five year old understands the concept of Endless worry and guilt over our parenting chioces, and a song about trying to juggle work, school run and being THERE for our children is going to be a bit dull Of course there is much much more to it than that - no one is suggesting otherwise.

Grendel, thats a bit of a non argument, its not really about housework is it, many motheres employ a cleaner and i would if i could afford it, but cleaners don't do the bulk of the laundry (i shall bet someone comes on and says "mine does"), but most mums do tidy, they do the pack lunches etc - its just trivia of life, i can't understand why people have their knickers ina twist over it

Mscombobulated · 16/03/2010 14:52

I disagree, i HATE housework and i am a messy cow, i certainly am not MS domesticated, but i love cooking for my family, and i actually LIKE doing the laundry - those things may seem trivial and to a certain degree they are, but those are the things that to our little ones, provide a bedrock of security. Of course it takes much much more to be a mummy, but i dont think the average five year old understands the concept of Endless worry and guilt over our parenting chioces, and a song about trying to juggle work, school run and being THERE for our children is going to be a bit dull Of course there is much much more to it than that - no one is suggesting otherwise.

Grendel, thats a bit of a non argument, its not really about housework is it, many motheres employ a cleaner and i would if i could afford it, but cleaners don't do the bulk of the laundry (i shall bet someone comes on and says "mine does"), but most mums do tidy, they do the pack lunches etc - its just trivia of life, i can't understand why people have their knickers ina twist over it

minipie · 16/03/2010 14:56

YANBU at all.

Yet another generation being subtly indoctrinated into believing that housework and cooking is something that women do.

Unless of course their fathers' day assembly will also involve songs thanking Daddy for all the hoovering he does.

Mscombobulated · 16/03/2010 18:51

oh i doubt that mini, i should imagine that this will be a generation that expects mummies to be hot shot lawyers and employ nannies to look after their children for them. So un PC is it to actually admit to enjoy being a SAHM and do all the domesticated things.

This makes me so I'm all for working mums, i've been one and will be one again - and i think that it is a fantastic role model for our children. But the SAHM who makes it her main role to care and nurture her children is equally fantastic as a role model.

TheApprentice · 16/03/2010 19:02

Well..........when I started teaching less than 20 years ago the school did a Mothers day assembly every year organised by the (nearly retired) deputy head. She did the same songs and poems every year, and had done for about the previous 30 I think. As the pianist I had to play the songs, I was presented with a book printed in the 1950s. I couldn't believe these songs - one went like this:-

Girls sing:- I think I'll wear for Easter
A bonnet made of lace
But most of all I think I'll wear
A smile upon my face.

Boys sing:- A smile upon your face?
A smile upon your face?
I think I'd like that better
than a bonnet made of lace!

Miggsie · 16/03/2010 19:06

Has anyone written the song:
-------
I love the way mummy spends the day reading emails from pillocks who have less sense than a six year old
Shouts at people
Gets wound up when her cab is late
Gets stuck in traffic
Just makes it to the school gates
While someone rings asking inane questions
And is being asked whether to sack someone as she runs to my classroom door
As I am the last kid to be collected
Again
I love how my mummy says
"sorry I'm late"
And then takes my bag
Switches her phone off
Asks me how my day was
Then takes me home and makes my tea
--------
Because that is my song.

mamazon · 16/03/2010 19:12

DD's school made mothers day card had a picture of me jumping with her on the trampoline.
her teacher is a family friend and when i saw her over the weekend she said that DD was very specific in what she wanted. all the other children wanted to draw flowers or hearts. DD had said "no mummy doesn't like flowers. she likes playing with me and being a kid"

can't say she is wrong.

DS was asked what 3 reasons he should be gratefull i was his mum he said
I buy him toys.
I make good cakes and because real mums dont play wii but im really good at it.

I wanted to smile but was a little concerned he didnt think i was a real mum .

JollyPirate · 16/03/2010 19:26

Have I stepped into some warped universe here? FGS - it was an assembly to celebrate mothering and mothers. When you are 6 or 7 then mothers make sure you get your food, cuddle you when you are sad and make sure you have clean clothes. What in the hell is wrong in children celebrating their mothers in this way even if Mum does do a heck of a lot more.

Cannot believe so many of you are irritated by it. Get a grip folks and to the OP - YABU and have missed the point of the assembly which was to say "Thank You Mum" and on Father's Day may say "Thank You Dad.

I actually thought when I read the OP it was going to be about some inappropriate pop song but no - an assembly celebrating just some of the things Mums do. And loads of you agreeing with it... have a suggestion for next year - don't go.

minipie · 16/03/2010 19:31

Mscombobulated

I don't think this is about SAHMs versus WOHMS at all. After all I'm sure most WOHMs do laundry and tidying up too.

I think this is about whether it's right to give children the impression that housework is something mummies do. And daddies, by implication, don't do.

Mscombobulated · 16/03/2010 19:37

but why lie to our children mini?

girlsyearapart · 16/03/2010 19:47

my mum found my mothers day thing about her it said 'I love my Mummy she cooks my dinner and looks like an angel'

Even though my Mum was a full time teacher and it was my dad/sister/childminder who did the school run with me my Mum loved that and still has it.

The assembly wasn't about how much Dads do around the house cos it was a mother's day assembly...

Original poster

HerBeatitude · 16/03/2010 20:59

God frankly I am really shocked by the low aspirations of some of you. This is a school we are talking about. You know - the place that is supposed to educate our children.

That's why I was slightly perturbed. If it were the X factor, or Coronation street, fine, be as stereotypical and lazy as you want. But this is supposed to be a place that educates our children and gives them opportunities that we as parents can't give them. The place where children are supposed to be inspired to find something better, or just different, to what they can find at home. Not the place that re-inforces stereotypes and lazy, backward assumptions. That's what TV is for.

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