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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish friends would help celebrate my birthday

73 replies

RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 11:07

Okay my last day at uni is also my 30th birthday- everyone in the group is aware. The lecturers were talking about going for lunch and one of the girls said 'oh its your birthday you should choose' a couple of self centred people tried to say oh im not going there at where I suggested even though when it has been there birthday we've done what they want.
SOOO AIBU?

OP posts:
cakeywakey · 04/03/2010 11:21

I don't think you're being unreasonable - if they don't want to go to where you've suggested, is it the end of the world if the don't come? Just go with the people who want to and have a great birthday

SloanyPony · 04/03/2010 11:23

Depends why. If its more expensive or they have transport problems with the venue, and are trying to steer it in a different direction then fine but depends why they are resisting really.

thedollshouse · 04/03/2010 11:24

Depends if you have chosen somewhere outrageously expensive.

Rubyrubyruby · 04/03/2010 11:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 11:28

I think there might be a slight conflict between celebrating your birthday and celebrating their own last day in Uni.

Maybe they prefer to do the latter.

I dont quite see why you would want to celebrate your birthday with your uni group. You are 30, not 4 and inviting your whole reception year to softplay.

Rubyrubyruby · 04/03/2010 11:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 11:30

great minds and all that ruby

mazzystartled · 04/03/2010 11:32

It's primarily lunch for the end of Uni
At which your birthday will be acknowledged
Go with the flow - you don't want to end up organising the damn thing or being responsible for everyone's good time
Will you do stuff with other friends, family etc later or at the weekend?
(and honestly 30 is great)

Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 11:35

Its not that I want to celebrate with the whole group but if we are going out for lunch its my birthday I HAVE to go in so want to go where I want yes it sounds divaish ultimatley but ive always been uber accomadating when its been other peoples birthday. As for going where they want the people complaining have decided the grad ball venue without any input from anyone else in the group... also where we are going is very reasonable so its not the cost thats an issue.

OP posts:
2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 11:41
Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 11:48

Quintessential can you not read? The bit about not making personal attacks?
Post reported x

OP posts:
Rubyrubyruby · 04/03/2010 11:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mazzystartled · 04/03/2010 11:54

I think you just need to chill out about it, Red
This lunch is mostly about finishing university - not your birthday party - if you want it to all be about you, you have to sort out something else yourself. As long as they don't want to go to MacDonalds, what is the problem?

Rubyrubyruby · 04/03/2010 11:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

greeneyeshadow · 04/03/2010 11:55

Um OP, this is AIBU- no one has attacked you - just told you that YABU.

I'm more worried that it's your last day at uni and you don't know the difference between its and it's and their birthday and there birthday.
Hoping that they're typos and you're just worked up about your big 3-0
Have a good one anyway

2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 11:56

"its my birthday I HAVE to go in so want to go where I want "

You are 30. These are uni friends. I would still hand back your rattle, too you, I will even throw in a pink teddy bear (or maybe a unicorn). If you see that as a reportable personal attack, then no wonder you are throwing a strop about not everybody wanting to go where you want.

Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 11:56

Because its not just any birthday- I have to go in to fill in forms etc to register- the prom/grad ball venue was sorted by the moaners so its yet something else they want to be in control of...surely for someones 30th its not too much to go to lunch with them? The end of uni celebration is the grad ball after all.

OP posts:
Kneazle · 04/03/2010 11:58

what personal attack ?

2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 11:58

"to you", not "too you"

Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 11:59

Wow lets all get personal about typos now- when you really cant think of something nasty to add chuck typos into the mix rolly rolly rolly eyes

OP posts:
2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 04/03/2010 12:00

Maybe they think it unfair that YOU get to chose where THEIR graduation lunch is. And maybe they think grown ups shouldn't be so hung up in their own birthdays.

I can quite understand if these are your only friends. They probably assume you have other friends and family you will celebrate with later, anyway.

swanandduck · 04/03/2010 12:01

My understanding from the OP is that you were asked to pick the venue and then one or 2 people from a big group objected. Have I read it correctly?

Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 12:02

Making sarky comments such as hands back rattle and pointing out typos IS in my eyes stooping to the realms of personal attacks imho but I probably stand alone here- good job I dont take things to heart really.

OP posts:
Original poster
RedRedWine1980 · 04/03/2010 12:03

Quint did you not read the post where I stated the grad ball is the celebration for finishing uni? And that they chose the venue?

OP posts:
Kneazle · 04/03/2010 12:04

I don't think that is a personal attack at all. I am amazed.

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