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Original poster

My H's XP has named her child the same as our son

90 replies

tartyhighheels · 04/03/2010 08:13

OMFG - my H has just told me that he got an email last night from his French XP saying that her newborn son has been named Lucien - our 15 month old son is named Lucian.

Given the plethora of names available to this highly educated woman, WTF is she doing nicking our name????? She did remark at the time what a nice name it was but this is ridiculous. This is an unusual name here a bit more common in France but in hardly common use.

I am so angry about this. I think I want to actually send her an email and say something (although thinking maybe not a good idea.......)

OP posts:
pigsinmud · 04/03/2010 10:56

I have to add that if I were her partner (weird idea there!) I would not be keen on using the name that her ex had used for his son. The more I think about it, it is quite odd. How does your dh feel about it?

Everyone knows that no-one owns a name, but think about it, it is strange. If it was a regular name Ben/Thomas etc.. but for a name so out of fashion (no offence meant there tartyhighheels - I think it's a lovely name!) it dosn't seem quite right.

eidsvold · 04/03/2010 10:57

my ex dh left me for my married best friend ( they had been having an affair the whole time we were married) When we divorced she was pregnant with their first child and they named it the name that ex dh and I had chosen for our future daughter.

Tacky in the extreme but no one has the rights over a name and that poor child - imagine being named by your parents a name your dad's ex had chosen. No big deal. I felt a little weird about it but hey you get that.

So maybe it was a name she had chosen with your dh and she liked it more than he did rather than he choosing it.

No idea why you are so angry about it.

bernadetteoflourdes · 04/03/2010 11:05

Ther are several spellings of Lucian (Roman name) Lucianus in Latin, Lucien in France Belgium Luciano in Italy there is also Lucius
so OP is correct. My db has a ds Milo and my sis met up with his ex last year and guess what her ds is named? Yes, Milo. Coincidence? I seems when they were all loved up (db and ex) they had played the what names do you like for boy/girl? Milo was joint choice for boys could that be the explanation here,
as long as she is not a "lapin" boiler I would not worry.

Original poster
tartyhighheels · 04/03/2010 11:08

Actually i asked him this morning about that - interestingly when he told her about our son being born she remarked what an unusual and lovely name it was. They did have quite a long but not very serious relationship - he in London, her in Paris.

Interestingly, at the same time I was in London with chap in Paris so my H and I were travelling on same train a lot of the time. Not that we met on eurostar.......

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 04/03/2010 11:10

Oh what was Reality's link (can't access it due to work firewall)

I bet it was Lambrini

Original poster
tartyhighheels · 04/03/2010 11:11

I can tell you that my lapin is feeling a little nervous certainly........

Unreasonable I may be but this is odd

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 04/03/2010 11:14

GetOrf- think of a poncier version of Matthew...very seventies bottle-shape that people brought back from holiday and made candle holders out of to remind them of their time in the sun...

Vivia · 04/03/2010 12:17

I don't understand why you have a problem with a name - a free name, to be chosen by anyone at any time - being replicated. Yet you have no problem with your DH lunching with his ex?

I'm not saying you should have a problem with the latter, but it makes you sound ridiculous to then have a problem with the name. This whole thread makes me

Original poster
tartyhighheels · 04/03/2010 17:58

Who my h chooses as a friend is not anything to do with me. It is intersting that so many people have mentioned this as if it is something wrong or should be discouraged... Honestly, I just cannot see what it has to do with the point i have raised about the name.

You are of course at liberty to think me unreasonable over the name but I just do not see the connection with who my H chooses as his friend.

Again, I might be highly unreasonable about this but did a straw poll today with chums and they thought it was weird to choose the same name too especially as the boys are only just over a year apart too.

Still waiting for the flush of flattery but just not happening for me.

OP posts:
GrendelsMum · 05/03/2010 16:22

I get on very well with my XDP and his new DW, but I got irrationally pissed off when for their wedding they asked for people to give them the same design of crockery that XDP and I had had together, and that I had kept when we split up

annielouisa · 05/03/2010 17:09

Did your H have or plan to have children with his ex? I just wonder if it was a name he chose with her so perhaps she liked it before you and he ever got together. This maybe be totally wrong but it is just a thought.

scottishmummy · 05/03/2010 17:17

if she sniffs your husbands chuddies when she visits - do worry

same name - get a grip no one nicked your name.no one owns a name.no dont email her or you will look loony and bothered by her

FairyTrucker · 05/03/2010 17:19

I think that she regards her x as a mere acquaintance .... they're not close enough, or connected enough for it to matter.... that's my guess. it's so inconsequential to her. take her cue?

ToccataAndFudge · 05/03/2010 17:21

oi expat - watch what you say about "John" - my brother is a John and he lives near you

MrsGuyOfGisbourne · 05/03/2010 17:44

lol @ all these babies named after cats

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