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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

for being annoyed that my children are not invited to a wedding?

88 replies

completelyshotpelvicfloor · 22/02/2010 22:48

I live in a little cul de sac with a grassy area out front. My neighbour of a long time is getting married would like to get married on the green. She asked us all to sign something to say that we didn't mind her using the green (and I don't). Her engagement party was there and it was fab.

Just got the save the date card and it says that there will only be children of the immediate family there (ie god sons, cousins etc) which basically means that the neighbours children (including mine) are not invited.

This will cause problems as the only way to our house is via the green so there is no way that I can pretend to my DS and DD that nothing is going on.

I am being unreasonable in being annoyed?

OP posts:

GothDetective · 23/02/2010 18:14

Is she having a marquee on the green? Just wondering if so then has she got permission from the council for this. I would imagine it would be a minefield of insurance/health and safety regs, etc. If no marquee then what's she going to do if it rains?

runnybottom · 23/02/2010 20:31

"i love that the wishes of the bride to have who she wants at her wedding are less important than those of a five year old..."

er yeah, general the wishes of an adult bride on her wedding day are thought to be more important than a random neighbours 5 year old. I don't believe anyone with an ounce of sanity can have a problem with that.

thesecondcoming · 23/02/2010 20:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LeQueen · 23/02/2010 20:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

runnybottom · 23/02/2010 21:03

Ah, did I misread? Very distinct possibility.....

BritFish · 23/02/2010 21:48

i've only read the first page of this thread.
well, you can hardly turn around and go 'ooh its a shared space so my kids should be there' if you specifically signed something telling you the wedding was there....

and so what if your child wants to join in?

she's not invited! thats it!

jasper · 23/02/2010 22:03

I would be delighted if I was asked to a wedding and my children were not, much as I love them dearly

Heated · 23/02/2010 22:14

Am grinning at mental image of wedding-on-the-green and competing birthday banners, balloons and perhaps tinkly ice-cream van for birthday boy's party guests.

It's a public space - unless she is erecting a marquee - then the bride will not be able to stop gawpers and lookers-on.

PeedOffWithNits · 23/02/2010 22:55

have not read ALL of the posts, but am wondering how the bride is going to stop traffic coming and going down the street ruining her ceremony and what about all the dog walkers, thats what our communal green gets used for

we have had people take it over for private parties and it is not on, makes you (in this case your DC) feel a prisoner in your own home

PeedOffWithNits · 23/02/2010 22:57

the more I think about it the odder the situation seems - am now imagining dozens of tesco/iceland/ocado lorries etc turning up with deliveries and traipsing through the proceedings.

minxofmancunia · 25/02/2010 08:53

i'm with tsc LeQueen and runnybottam on this one, for as much as their are bridezillas ther are also childzillas too. It's one day, let her have it her way, your child is not more important than the bride, end of.

I was bullied into including people I didn't want at my wedding, my mum insisted some of her posh friends come who I hardly knew (just so she could show off) and a couple of male friends who I'd known for years had aquired neurotic, jealous, whining girlfriends who I'd never met. Although the invitation was for the friends only their pita gorlfriends forbade them to go unless they were allowed too. Because I wanted friends there I was forced to include these people in thr numbers, costing me £80 more and taking up 2 seats. Yes I was incredibly pissed off with bloody good reason.

Give your neighbour a break. Don't stress her out.

Carseatcrazy · 25/02/2010 09:01

I'd throw a lovely childrens party for your DS's birthday You could even do a bit of chalk drawing on your front path as a way of entertaining them- and what about a lovely picnic on your "front garden"!!! Sorry I'm wicked!! naughty naughty me!!!!

Blondeshavemorefun · 25/02/2010 13:48

the bride can choose if she wants children there - if she has other neighbours children there then yanbu but if no others are invited yabu

and if only has got siblings/relatives/immed family there then yabvu

sure your children will survive not being invited to a wedding, they can sit and watch with tear filled eyes through the window, or they can go to a friends/gps for the day/night

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