to BF my 10 month old in A&E?

[SlightlyDoolally]

Took DS to A&E this morning as he'd nosedived off the bed and got a nosebleed. We were seen pretty quickly by the triage nurse, but then had another wait of an hour to see the paediatrician.

So in total, we were in the waiting room about 90 mins, during which time DS would normally have had a nap followed by a feed.

He was ok sitting on my knee for a little while, then understandably got hungry/tired and wanted a feed. So I fed him, discreetly where we were sitting in the waiting room.

Whilst I was feeding him, the paediatrician came to examine him, saw that I was feeding him, and rushed off embarrassed saying he would come back later. He returned 30 mins later and examined DS (who, thankfully, was fine).

Then the dr said that I shouldn't have BF DS in the waiting room as it was too public, and I should have asked for another room to feed in. I was and asked whether anyone had complained, and he said no but that it was inappropriate to feed "a child of that age" in front of everyone.

I was utterly appalled that he, of all people, had said that. Surely paediatricians should be supporting BF mothers, or at least should be in favour of anything that is comforting and/or nourishing to little ones who've had an accident. FWIW, all the other staff in A&E were brill - the receptionists gave DS a teddy bear, and some other patients were playing peekaboo with him to keep him happy. No-one seemed to bat an eyelid when I fed DS, so I was shocked when I was taken to task for it by the Dr.

So, was IBU?

Have you written a letter yet? If not I'm more than happy to help [stressed mummy who wants to bitch rant emotion]

Seriously though, that's terrible!! I had to take DS up to A&E a few weeks ago and fed him a few times whilst I was up there (couldn't get home...) and most people were fine. A couple of "Oh, um, pardon me...", but mainly from people who had been looking at him saying how cute he was, and then realised I was feeding. I'm really quite annoyed on your behalf at being asked that. There's all this press about how breast is best, and yet then breast feeding mothers are discouraged by making it so antisocial! Though saying that, this Dr sounds like such a prat he'd have probably complained if you had done anything...

Glad your DS is okay

Dollally, yes, there are loads of us, and yes we do meet up. Will post some links in a sec!
Can i just stand up for the hospital in general? While what this paed did was ignorant & stupid, I have given birth to 2 babies there and bf children of various ages (iykwim, that sounds odd) and never had a bad experience. Hopefully all the bad is countered with good - still not good enough i know!

Complain! And please let us know what the response is.

Btw, I have just emailed my mate who is training to be a doctor (he was shocked too), and asked him to get his teachers to remind everyone that it is not ok to suggest a breastfeeding woman should stop!

that's really stupid but it sounds like one man's problem.

I was actually encouraged to BF then-7 month old DS in A&E when he was waiting to be seen, to keep him hydrated and happy. (he had an extremely high fever)

no harm in complaining though to emphasis the point. If she wanted him stuck off I would agree she was going a bit over the top

Actually I think the doctor is breaking the law in the UK as the existing sexual discrimination law can be used to pursue this www.babiesnappies.co.uk/2008/07/20/breastfeeding-in-public-the-laws-made-clear/

NE meet up thread 1

meet up thread number 2

Doolally get yourself over to these threads

First thread we are having a child free night at The Capital Indian in Durham, the second we are taking the tiny terrors to a soft play in Gateshead.

How on earth can a doctor be offended by the sight of a breast anyway? If religious objection is a problem, surely he shouldn't be in a profession which generally involves looking at parts of the human body.

YANBU. I feed my baby in hospital and doctor waiting rooms. He's 13months now and never had a negative comment and would be horrified if I got one from medical staff, let alone a paed.

thank you BT, I am too lazy

thought they of all people will be supporting bf, went to A&E in Milton Keynes and they had stickers on the door saying that they support bf and that it was bf friendly, complain! Anyway hes not child hes still a baby fgs.

I think you should write a letter and point out your (very reasaonable) objections to his attitude. If we don't speak up, then nothing changes. And this sort of thoughtless behaviour needs challenging.

I took my then 10 month old to the GP for one of his injections. He wasn't keen and started fussing afterwards, so I gave him a quick comfort BF whilst we were talking about something else (to do with me). My GP looked all horrified and said: "are you still breastfeeding him?" then she said: "you'll spoil him, you know!" double

I pleasantly pointed out to her that she was talking tosh. And then emailed her some BF guidelines for her further elucidation. Silly woman. And she's got two children as well!

WHAT?

@ doc. What a tit. (no pun intended)

When feeding DC3 at a local shopping outlet a security guard came and asked me to move as I was offending people.

So I asked him

a) can you see anything from where you are stood. He had to answer no! I am very discrete.

b) had anyone complained to him. Again he had to say no! My reply was so this is your own personal hang up then? He had the grace to look embarassed.

c) I then went for the juggular and asked him if he fancied me bringing about a prosecution for sexual discrimination? He just looked at me, so I repeated the question, to which he replied no. So I told him what he had done was illeagle and I would be reporting him to his supervisor and if he didn't want me to also bring about a prosecution then I suggested he got on with his job of stopping shoplifters and not to harrass innocent mothers.

He departed pretty quickly

After finishing feeding I went to the security guards room and asked to see the supervisor. The guy was an asshole to say the least and really gave me a mouthful. So I took his details and wrote to the company and the shopping centre management team and the supervisor was moved to another centre and I had an apology and vouchers from the centre. There was also a promise to train staff and a thank you for not going to the press.

Hmmm. I think it's worth writing to the hospital so that the doctor can be 'retrained' on BF.

Incidentally, I've given a talk on BF ( and even given a live demonstration) to medical students near me. The university gets Bf mothers to talk to the students ever tear - and it is shocking how ignorant many of them are.

And how uncomfortable many of the male trainees seem to be around it ( nervous laughter etc)

You do think that surely they have seen worse than a woman BF.

Sorry 'every year'

YANBU
I would write a letter.

Definitly complain, and quote the following:

"UK mothers who breastfeed their children, are celebrating after the government clarified today that mothers are, and always have been, free to breastfeed in public places. Breastfeeding mothers are also protected in law under the provision of goods, services and facilities section of the Sexual Discrimination Act when breastfeeding, whatever the age of the baby, in places such as cafes, restaurants, libraries, surgeries etc."

The whole article can be read here

This is from a year and a half ago. He really should have known better.

i visited my gp for an appointment about bf issues and because i had pnd.whilst in waiting room i fed dd(my pfb and now almost 10) and was told to go to side room as i was offending other people.

i fed her for about 1 more week and gave up sadly.it really dented my confidence.plus the fact i was having troubles feeding and the pnd.

yanbu at all! this is terrible and you must complain. ime most healthcare areas have signs up saying "you are welcome to bf here" certainly all the drs surgeries round here do and I've bf both dc in them without incident.

i'd get in touch with the hospital bf co=ordinator too.

Aaaaarrrggghhhhhh! I just don't get why breastfeeding is an issue at all. Bizarre, weird, illogical ... a natural practice which goes back to the dawn of time, completely undermined by the sexualisation of the female anatomy. STUPID MAN!!!

MRSGOK Perfect way to handle the situation. Tackle it head on at the time it happens.

Thank you MrsGok takes a bow

got told off by a nurse for bf my newborn at bedside of my older son (who'd had an op), without drawing curtains. It honestly had'nt occurred to me - I was pretty discrete (not half naked or anything). I just ignored her but it is very bizarre that nurses or a paediatric doctor should be so weird about this. Hope you do complain. A& E is horrible for kids and you'd expect them to rush you through not leave you hanging around for hours - bloody NHS - they forget we do pay for this service!

Odd Odd Odd!!!!

My DS2 took a top to toe tumble down the stairs when he was about 15 months - I was SOOOOO grateful for the fact I was still BFing as what better way to give comfort and food to your child in distress - no-one seemed to be bothered about me feeding him in a busy city A&E - we were in hospital from 5pm to 10pm before getting admitted to a ward, where I could actually ask if there was a chance of food or a drink for him or me?