In thinking that a couple living in a one bed flat with 2 kids should not have decided to get 2 dogs ?

[nevereatbrownsnow]

Am watching tower block of commons and really don't see the logic in this.

Both dogs are peeing everywhere, those children have no beds and there little playspace is saturated in dog urine.

Children deserve a bed at least and cleanish floors to play on, makes me feel

Seems selfish, they have little money and feeding two dogs of that size is not cheap.

Feel really sorry for the poor girl in temporary accomodation tho.

[MorrisZapp]

This thread isn't about people who take great care of their kids and dogs and then fall on hard times.

Nobody would dream of criticising such people so it's irrelevant to the topic.

Do people care about their kids' health, cleanliness etc then stop caring because they've fallen on hard times, and then let them play around dog shit?

[sweetkitty]

Whilst I don't agree at all with the MPs expenses thing, two wrongs don't make a right and yes he did have a point about her handing over £40 a week for cigarettes.

Most people working cannot afford to waste £40 a week, we certainly can't. My pleasure is my children and doing the best we can for them. £40 a week would pay for a nice wee holiday for them all. Maybe it's just me I cannot get my head around smoking being a pleasure, it's a nasty addiction, that if it doesn't kill you early will rob you of your looks, money and make you stink, where is the pleasure in that exactly?

I remember going to school with holes in my trainers and begging my Mum and Dad for a new pair to be told "we cannot afford it" whilst both of them smoked like chimneys

And the father whose children didn't have bedding and he smoked cannabis and played the horses, he should be ashamed sorry but he should.

Most of us would go hungry and without things for ourselves if it meant feeding our DCs or buying them clothes and other things they need, I think that's why we cannot understand parents who chose to drink and smoke whilst their DC go without.

[nevereatbrownsnow]

And my mum raised 4 kids in the 80's completely alone, it was made far worse as we lived in a fairly wealthy area and were the only single parent family in the school.

It was crap but we didnt have dog pissy carpets !

[slightlystressed]

Sorry havn't seen the programme.

I guess this is an arguement for people to have licenses to own dogs. That way the dogs and children would be alot happier I guess.

Anyway surely children wondering around in dog piss and nothing to sleep on is neglectful, are social services involved in this?

[LoveBeingAMummy]

I am certainly not saying anything about me being a better parent.

No I have not lived like that and would not wish it on my worst enermy. My parents came from council houses. My DH came from a very poor background, his childhood would not be out of place in a documentry.

My comments were directed at the example we were dicussing from the programme and the research you had mentioned and was not personally directed at your history of which I knew nothing about.

Its a fact that many of the very old who are forced to move pass away soon after. I would hope that you can see where i am coming from.

I have made comments simliar or the same as other posts and yet i am the one who is being called names because I dared to say an old lady shouldn't be forced out of her house.

The real problem is the lack of housing, not my gran.

[MorrisZapp]

Well people could do all kind of ill advised things if they had a mental health issue, from the comical to the criminal. But if we can't say anything about anybody's parenting in case they have depression then we might as well go home now.

[junglist1]

That's the thing, living in poverty does make you depressed. I really don't think all these people are making it up. Lack of money leads to lack of freedom, lack of choice, all you are is a puppet on a string. I stopped smoking when I got pregnant but sometimes I needed a fag because of stress. It wasn't daily but it did calm me down sometimes. I was told I'd have to move to Birmingham with my first son to live in a hostel and if I didn't go they'd close my case. That's the reality of it. I don't agree with smoking like chimneys some effort should be made to cut down obviously

[nevereatbrownsnow]

I suffer from depression,I've been a carer since I was 17 and have little to no sleep.

I have never had a night out with my partner

My life is pretty crap tbh.

But I don't waste money on shite because I can't freaking afford too.

We have no dogs to piss on carpets as well, can't bloody afford them either grumble, mutter, mumble !!

[junglist1]

I suppose everyone on here talks from personal experience. Definetely the system that's crazy, not the fault of the elderly or asylum seekers or anyone else

[junglist1]

Only mentioned Birmingham because I'm from London and never lived anywhere else by the way, not saying it's a horrible place to live or anything

[nevereatbrownsnow]

So they're depressed because they're skint so they spend they're precious money on fags and booze which will make them more skint thus making them more depressed. And therein lies the problem.

[MorrisZapp]

Of course telly progs are edited to enhance the drama. But I don't think the camera actually lies - you could equally say that politicians on telly have been edited to look bad.

If they said something, they said it. And if they were filmed doing something, they did it.

[LoveBeingAMummy]

I never said it was her house(quickly reading the thread), but it is her home and the council seem happy for her to be there thanks.

[LoveBeingAMummy]

Maybe i find it hard to undertsnad the somking bit cause i never have, i can't see me spending that much money like that when the kids are in need of so much (same goes for the dog tbh)

[DoingTheBestICan]

One of the problems imo is a lack of motivation,once you are on the bones of your arse it is very,very hard to have the get up & go to try & better yourself.

I,myself grew up on a council estate with a Mum who worked in the evenings cleaning offices & a father who worked sporadically due to redundnacy from the steelworks.We were very poor but we were lucky enough to be homed in a 4 bedroomed council house & we always had a warm bed at the end of the day & a full belly.

Sure we never had flashy clothes or trainers & i was teased in school about my clothes,neither of my parents smoked but they did used to go out on a Sunday evening for a drink with their friends.

Money was very tight but the estate had a camaraderie about it,neighbours would knock to borrow 50p for the meter or tv,We all looked out for each other & tried to make the best of what we had.

I dont understand how people can put animals before their own children,but i bet their are people who own their own homes that live in exactly the same circumstances.

Things need to be done to give people back a bit of pride,not charity,but something to bring a community together.

Maybe that way they will 'want' to live in better conditions & try & help themselves.At the end of the day people need to get out of the mindset of what will the govt do to help me to what can we do to help ourselves?

[LoveBeingAMummy]

Smoking is an addiction - i understand that bit, my mum is also, my dad was until 20 years ago. But to spend that money and set fire to it when your kids need stuff, can you understand it?

[nevereatbrownsnow]

I think even the bones of my arse have worn away

[Morloth]

It is hard to have sympathy for a smoking addiction cutting into kid's necessities when you know there are people who without food so that their kids are looked after. Food is quite addictive as well.

[amber1979]

I'm an ex smoker and there is no excuse not to quit if you can't afford it... you can get Champix, patches etc on your free prescriptions if you're on income based benefits.

[expatinscotland]

'But if we can't say anything about anybody's parenting in case they have depression then we might as well go home now. '

That's pretty much how every single one of these threads has gone.

There's apparently no one on benefits at all who isn't depressed or had bad luck and hit hard time.

People like our downstairs neighbour or the guy in the next close who peddle drugs and are awaiting sentencing - the rumour is he will get a custodial sentence this time - don't exist.

People like my SIL's ex-partner, a man who has never worked in his entire adult life (he's now in his 40s) save for dealing drugs, because he is 'depressed' don't exist.

All these people are made up.

[expatinscotland]

'I'm an ex smoker and there is no excuse not to quit if you can't afford it... you can get Champix, patches etc on your free prescriptions if you're on income based benefits.'

That's the most sensible thing I've read all day.

[bronze]

re the smoking
my husband gave up this week because we cant afford it (we're lucky we are ok really) but he decided that there were other more important things. The patches and inhalator are cheaper than the baccy for the next couple of months then after that we will have more money. It can be done especially when other things are more important.