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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to just march into the classroom and take my kids ?

398 replies

princessparty · 02/02/2010 17:07

I am SO fed up of them being late out of school when we have to rush off to afterschool clubs.They are supposed to come out at 3.30 and we can just make the 4-6 yo gymnastics session if we leave at 3.30 on the dot.
So today i just walked into each of their classrooms and said 'excuse me Mr X I need to take Y now.' in a pleasant way.I think I'm going to do it every week now
I mean we get them to school on time,they should get them ou on time.

OP posts:
compo · 02/02/2010 18:56

school is way more important than poxy afterschool clubs

one of ds' classmates goes to aftersch clubs every night

not because she is working but because precious xxx has to be an expert at all sports and instruments

pigletmania · 02/02/2010 18:57

how rude! If you were that concerned why did you not have a little word with the teacher instead of showing yourself up and embarrassing your dc. I can imagine the embarrasment that i would have if my mum did that .

atworknotworking · 02/02/2010 18:58

I would flip my lid if a parent had open access to my dd's classroom. AS for having a keypad lock that all and sundry know the code to I'm . The school needs to review its security proceedures pronto, but then after your little escapade they probably already have.

YANBU to be fed up with the children taking so long to come out I've often spent a good 20min waiting in the pouring rain / wind / snow.

YABU however to do what you did, and too worry about getting to after school clubs ontime.

Pozzled · 02/02/2010 18:58

Lavnderbongo- that sounds wonderful, and I wish that could be the case for UK schools. Sadly, I don't see how it could be. I know of too many instances where parents have come in, threatened teachers, or been verbally or physically abusive towards other kids.

nitsparty · 02/02/2010 18:59

Just to refer to the point about after-school clubs being less important than school-my daughter's after school clubs (ballet and music lessons) are now her degree subjects (musical theatre).
I'm shocked about the level of security in the school-they are online for an instant ofsted failure-please tell them this. oh and ask the teacher to please be prompt-he or she might just respond positively. Teaching 30 years now. I think all education is important, not just the bit they do in the classroom.

Jamieandhismagictorch · 02/02/2010 19:01

atwork - thank you for using the term "flip my lid" - have not heard it for a long time and I have missed it.

< mental note to start using it to DCs eg. "If you two don't stop showing your bottoms to each other I will flip my lid !"

Jamieandhismagictorch · 02/02/2010 19:04

I also like "screaming ab- dabs" - that was my MN name for a while

and

"Punch up the bracket"

thenewbornnanny · 02/02/2010 19:04

Madness! No wonder so many kids have an entitlement complex. They're learning it from their loopy parents.

danceswithfools · 02/02/2010 19:04

Is this real??? Is gymnastics really that important??? I don't get it...

skidoodle · 02/02/2010 19:07

"I would flip my lid if a parent had open access to my dd's classroom."

Why?

You people are all nuts. You know in most of the world children aren't locked into schools?

Schools are meant to be part of the community. Although I guess in a country where children are gradually being removed from all contact with adults except their parents the concept of "community" as it might pertain to children is all but obsolete.

"I have close friends in Dunblane who lost their children because someone could walk into the building freely."

No, they lost their children because a maniac who had access to firearms wanted to kill little children.

pagwatch · 02/02/2010 19:07

gymnastics is very important.

It is far more important to be bendy than brainy.

I am almost sure that is true

[bendy]

danceswithfools · 02/02/2010 19:10

I was afraid someone might say that
[stiff and not that bright, either]

IncontinentiaBotox · 02/02/2010 19:13

my children's school has an open-door policy. and I would be appalled if I had barely seen the inside of their classrooms!

I wouldn't have done what the OP did, but I do think some teachers could make a bit more effort not to keep the parents hanging around after school. It's disrespectful - respect cuts both ways, and I think some of the teachers on MN are worryingly unaware of this.

LoremIpsum · 02/02/2010 19:14

Agree with most posters that the OP is BVU, and more than a little snotty and rude.

However, we're now in Australia and it's just as Lavenderbongo describes NZ. No locked doors, and most parents I know would be horrified to find their child's school locked. Of course there's an office, but most schools have many different entry points. If you need your child during the day, to give medication or pick them up for an appointment, you just let the office know and then head to the classroom but if you're just dropping something off, a lunchbox say, most parents would just run in and drop it off.

You wouldn't get far with an attitude like the OP's, but most teachers are welcoming and most parents polite. There's no way that abuse or harassment of any teacher would be tolerated at our school, but incidents are rare (I'm only aware of one in the past six years) are dealt with on an individual basis rather than blanket rules being imposed on the whole parent body.

LIZS · 02/02/2010 19:15

Am I right in thinking these are infant school children ? Isnl;t it mreo imrpotanat that they come out in an ordelry ancd controlled fashion . If one parent gets away with it, it could start chaos. Hardly make or break if they miss the start of the session surely, or you'll have to find a later/weekend club - or are they scheduled for something else then ?

HarlotOTara · 02/02/2010 19:19

Security locks etc. have only been used at schools since the Dunblane tragedy, my eldest dd was the same age as those poor souls and I remember safety precautions being installed afterwards.

Why would a school be an instant Ofsted failure because of security locks? This is a new one to me

AmazingBouncingFerret · 02/02/2010 19:24

This takes me back... At primary school, I remember being in lesson, we were all just packing up for the day, one boys mum comes storming in grabbing him and his stuff, shouting at the teacher saying that she had more important stuff to be doing than waiting around all afternoon for her son.
The boy was ridiculed for months afterwards, bless him (we all thought it was hilarious at the time) But looking back you could tell he was really mortified.

atworknotworking · 02/02/2010 19:26

skidoodle I work with children who are under protection orders, children need to be kept safe and sadly there are people out their who need to be kept away from children be it their own or other peoples.

And yes those poor children in Dunblane may not have been killed if the madman was unable to gain access to the building.

The school is in severe breach of protection guidelines by having this system so poorly monitored, they have a duty to keep children in their care safe they are failing miserably in doing this and quite frankly should be reported.

5inthebed · 02/02/2010 19:29

Pag, you are correct in your thinking.

What school doesn't have a full time secretary, and allows the parents AND kids to have the access code? Dangerous situation if ever I heard one.

gorionine · 02/02/2010 19:30

Even if the teacher finishes the lesson on the dot at 3.30 surely it does take a few minutes for the children to actually get out of the door? (pick up their book pack, put their coats on, tell a joke to a friend...)

DcS (mine) tell me that when the bell goes in their school, the teacher stops the lesson but insists on the children going out of the classroom in a quiet manner (fair enough) which possibliy will take a couple of minutes to get out of the class.

I think it was really rude and a poor example to barge in .

atworknotworking · 02/02/2010 19:31

Thank you 5inthebed.

I was beginning to think I was loosing the plot.

Northernlurker · 02/02/2010 19:37

OP - I wish I could say that I can't believe your posts - but alas I can. What is it about blithering gym club that turns normal human beings in to raving monsters? I don't get it. Round our way people practically kill to get their kids in - what am i missing? Is there an associated free bar or orgy?

Jamieandhismagictorch · 02/02/2010 19:41

Northern - ask pag about the orgies - she is very "bendy"

MrsBadger · 02/02/2010 19:44

Northern, it's because they come home absolutely knackered and fall straight into bed at 6pm

miles better than violin / yoga / french / kumon

GettinTrimmer · 02/02/2010 19:46

It's out of order to march into the classroom, YABU, as other posters have said it would have been more respectful to ask for a quiet word.

Teachers have to put up as well with parents who are routinely late to collect, that extra 10 minutes could be spent doing other things.

Having said that, my ds is occasionally late out of school because he sometimes can't find his hat, coat, pokemon cards, etc, etc, only very rarely has it been due to the teacher not getting them out of the door at 3.30pm.