to ask this woman to move away from us?

[Mummy2Scarlet]

I was in town with DD(6) this morning after taking her to the dentist and we were waiting to get the bus back to school.

As we sat and waited on a wall, a lady came and sat next to us and lit a cigarette. DD has asthma and so I moved us away, but the wind was still blowing the cigarette smoke into her face and she started to get wheezy from the smoke. I need both hands to manage her inhaler and spacer and so we had to sit back down on the wall again next to this lady so I could give it to her. As the lady's cigarette smoke was clearly making DD wheezy, I asked if she would mind moving away a little and I think I was as polite as I could be when I asked her. She refused and so I had to sit, trying to give DD her inhaler next to someone who was smoking a cigarette, which really upset me.

Anyway, the bus came shortly after and we got on and DD was fine, but was I being unreasonable to ask her to move?

YANBU - what a selfish woman. Chosing to smoke is one thing. Choosing to smoke next to a child is quite another, even without your DD needing her inhaler, the woman was BVU.

YANBU. The woman was very selfish and rude.

YANBU but the woman was. How rude!

i think the lasy was being unreasonable, considering she was outside and could have moved anywhere whereas you needed to be sitting to do what you you needed to do. she didnt need to sit on that wall to smoke.

lady not lasy

YANBU this happened to us expect that our son was a baby at the time and had one of those little masks to breathe through for the inhalor, he had recently come out of hospital and we were out for one of the first times. We were sitting outside in a cafe and the woman refused to move so we complained to the manager who asked her to move. She seemed to think she had more right to smoke than my son had to breathe which made me very angry.

yanbu

Of course YANBU, she was a cow. And I say that as a smoker. Wouldn't dream of smoking around someone who is using an inhaler, or who I know is asthmatic, FGS!

What a tosser!YANBU at all!

You should have wee'd on her shoes.

No your definatly NBU. This woman was obviously a complete cow! What an awkward situation for you.

I agree that the nice thing for her to do would have been to move. However - re Fernie's complaint about someone smoking outside a cafe - why didn't you just move inside the cafe where smoking isn't allowed? The smoker wasn't doing anything wrong - and you had chosen to sit somewhere wher smoking was allowed?

I smoke but I would never light up on the street next to a child, especially once I saw the child needed an inhaler because of me!! I would be horrified.

I wouldn't even sit down next to an adult and light up a cigarette, if I really needed to smoke on the street I stand in a corner. But can't remember when I last smoked on the street.

Think smoking on the street has become v. common in the 'lots of people do it' sense since the ban. (Always used to be regarded as common in the 'as muck' sense, too.)

lal123 we sat outside because it was a lovely day and we wanted to be out in the sunshine why should we be hidden away inside because we chose not to smoke? . We were already sat there when she came and sat next to us she could have chosen to sit further away.

yanbu, no one should smoke next to a child who was already there. Fernie's not unreasonable either. Smoking is antisocial because it's unpleasant and healthy for people nearby, and that's why it's banned practically everywhere.

You should have been hidden away out of the smoke because your baby was on an inhaler? If you choose to sit outside in the sun where smoking is allowed then thats your choice?

YANBU. Also, why should someone move their child and themselves into a cafe. It may have been a lovely summers day.

Fernie had not chosen to sit where smoking was allowed, she had chosen to sit in the clean, fresh air (until someone came along and polluted it).

YANBU, what a horrible person. I also hate it when smokers light up in bus shelters when it's raining, giving everyone else the choice of inhaling the smoke or getting soaked.

Another experience along the same lines... was in the antenatal clinic waiting room at the local hospital and one of the assistant midwifes was outside smoking right next to an open window. Bad enough that she was smoking in the 'strictly non-smoking' hospital grounds, but she didn't even have the grace to look ashamed when I got up and closed the window.

Members of the general public are just so horrible sometimes.

I think I live in a little bubble - drive everywhere, work in a small team, don't go out much...and I forget sometimes actually how rude, inconsiderate, and downright self-centred folk can be. What a nasty woman - she must have been able to clearly see your daughter was suffering.

I have to say most smokers I know would have been profusely apologetic and moved the instant you asked. So YANBU.

When I was at Uni (quite some years ago ) I got on the train in the city centre to travel to my local station. Shortly before the train left the station, a man got on a little further down the carriage. It was one of those old-fashioned carriages which have a relatively limited number of seats in a carriage and you couldn't move between carriages - and doors for each set of seats (so rather old fashioned!)(even then).

He started to get a cigarette and lighter out, and I asked him politely if he would refrain from smoking as it was a non-smoking carriage. He refused, and lit up.

I'm allergic to cigarette smoke - I get to the stage where I struggle to breathe and cough a lot. However, I admit that I overdid the symptoms somewhat (already having done what I could to be as far away as possible, and opening windows etc... He was so shocked at the result that he immediately stubbed his cigarette out and appologised... I wheezily accepted

No, YANBU!

Oh YANBU, although i read your title as though you were going to ask her to move house .

Definately not being unreasonable. I am an anti smoking militant and feel no shyness about asking people not to smoke near my non asthmatic DD. It fucking stinks. I will often pass comment if people are walking in front of me in the street and i have to breathe in their noxious fumes. Never mind that it is lethal - it makes me feel sick. They all tend to hold their ciggarettes down by their sides too - i am paranoid about DD getting burnt - oh and god help anyone if they did!!!

YANBU.
LEM I feel the same way. People hold their cigarettes at face-height for small toddler and little ones in pushchairs. I dread to think what could happen.