(Dear IPOATthe Fourth, that a happy ending is altogether unlikely?

[Hullygully]

Or not?

Ahh widow, twas a recon mission of sorts, I have scouted and discovered myself (allowing time for the delusional but darling Hully to claim her 'throne') and I am hoping I can persuade you all to return with me

Umami . I fear you are now taunting darling Hully somewhat withyour grandiose displays of nightwear. Showing off is very vulgar.

Gibbon , you look most well dear but I worry about the draft, shall I fetch you a nice cardigan. I think you are quite lucky not have have been sunburnt dressed as you are.

Any news from India?

Hully dearest, can you help me? I can't quite make out what you were just saying. Is it some new modern talk? Do share - you know I always like to be a la mode.

Pag

Have some flowers! You did so make me smile last night

Yes I feel a covering of sorts is indeed in order. I must leave my new wild and free ways behind for now.

(Hey Gibbles - That thread was and .
Dh asked what I had been doing and i told him I was reading a haiku for my cunt. He won't ask again I think...)

Anyway - I am plaesed to see how you have managed to combine warmth, style and enlightenment in one outfit

I know it was, I very rarely use that word and never in RL but I was appalled at the attitude (and maybe a tad overrun with pregnancy hormones)

DH also asked what I was laughing at and was and when I told him.

What with my posts and links I am becoming very risqué, I blame Hully quite frankly.

and yourself, the widow, mimi et al.

Infact I blame all of you for my moral abasement.

What what what?

Been to India? Without us? You are demoted to fifth lady of the chamberpot herewith.

You can blame me for nothing. I am shortly to be Queen now that the Prince Regent has so sadly drowned in the overflowing spittoon and therefore brandish my divine right and infallibility, I have added infallibility to monarchical attributes as I fear there was an oversight in its direction, and therefore am beyond you, the law and, I fear, all reason.

(What I would like to know is how is it you can leave your garden entirely unattended for some weeks and then find it brimming with dogs' leavings and largely dug up by badgers. What an unpleasant morning I have spent and no mistake.)

I am concerned about the combination of infallibility and unpredictability all in one monarch.

Will there be feasts?

Poor Prince Regent. How did his head get so far into the spitoon, and what is this mysterious footprint on the back of his neck...

What underbred viper do I see attempting to usurp my throne?

A natural half-sister you say? Ha! There are lodges full of 'em at Windsor, and you shall join them anon...

Take away this badly attired buffoon and bring me my pink coat..

Fear not! Graciousness and an elegance unimagined in one Queen shall be my comportment. I shall hardly execute anyone.

The footprint is from where he fell backwards onto the upturned spring laden shoe of one of my dwarves and catapulted himself back upwards and over into the spittoon where he became unfortunately and irrevocably wedged. Goodness how sad.

This crown? Or this? Perhaps both? Oh I do look forward to my coronation! I must find me a consort.

yes yes. we will remove him imediately

no? the wrong one you say? Badly dressed what?

But you are quite deceased, Sir!

Are you yet within my portals, foul pretender! Your comportment, your language and your morals show how unfit you are to be seen in public....

Lord Chamberlain, eject this miss at once!

oohhh I say!

Leave, I say, or else I shall have my dragoons forcibly eject you!

if I had a guinea for every wench who claimed to be my sister I should have no need of parliament to clear my debts....

Blackadder, come hither at once!

ah, Blackadder, use your cunning wiles to rid me of this pest!

Damn.

I am going out to inspect potential future queenly residences. I may be some time. Understand this, Sir, upon my return I shall take my rightful throne by one means or another. There shall be no more shilly-shallying.

Perhaps they have need of a Queen in India? I am sure they would like to be part of an Empire. Who wouldn't care to be yoked under the glorious,er, yoke of fair Albion?

+++Not enough biscuits error+++

In India you will leave these worldly desires behind my dear friend. I can assure you. enlightenment awaits!

Come Hully. I am sure you will make a fine Rani for some wealthy Mughal. Let us away to the.....boat again, I suppose?

Will there be jewels and willing servants?

Don't encourage her widow, she must aspire to enlightenment.