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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to tell my nan that I thought this was a bit young for DS or is it not too young for DS?

67 replies

Coldhands · 14/01/2010 19:20

Its my DS's 2nd birthday soon. My nan usually asks what to get/does he have thie etc. I assumed she would again and thought of something to tell her. Now it is a shame and I feel very guilty but she is known in the family for not picking great presents. I feel awful as she tries really hard but it got to the point that I had to tell her I wanted no more lavender stuff/drawer liners/slippers etc that she usually gets. I hate the thought of someone wasting their money on something I won't use.

Anyway, she said she has got DS a spinning top for his birthday. I said I thought this was a bit young for him. He is quite advanced for his age anyway and I can't see him playing with something like this when he is so car/train mad.

AIBU to think that this is a bit young for his age?

OP posts:
compo · 14/01/2010 19:21

yabu to tell her

i can't honestly beleive you told her you dont like the gifts she gives you that is really rude. would it be so hard to give them to charity if you don't like them?

Morloth · 14/01/2010 19:22

DS is almost 6 now and was playing with his spinning top thing (the sort where you push the handle down and it spins really fast and makes a woooooo noise) just the other day. It was driving me up a feckin' wall.

LetThereBeRock · 14/01/2010 19:23

You actually said that to her? How mean.

And YABU.

IncontinentiaBotox · 14/01/2010 19:23

I think if she's already bought it it was very rude of you to tell her it's wrong

also I don't see how a 2yo is too "advanced" for a spinning top

my dh is pretty advanced for his age - he's big into astrophysics - but he's not above spending twenty minutes trying to get the loudest possible hum out of a spinning top

LetThereBeRock · 14/01/2010 19:24

Make that YABVU. He's 2 not 10. It's a lovely gift.

kinnies · 14/01/2010 19:25

Not if she wont be upset.

When an older person in my family buys presants that are not really any good for DC, I skirt around it by saying "thankyou" and putting them aside for somone else or if they are from ELC, asda or tesco (own brand) you can take (only if they are un-opened) back to swap.
Shes none the wiser and everyones happy

NomDePlume · 14/01/2010 19:26

nearly 2 ?!

YABU.

kinnies · 14/01/2010 19:27

Oh yabu- if shes upset
yanbu if shes happy with it.

zapostrophe · 14/01/2010 19:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

LetThereBeRock · 14/01/2010 19:29

And if he's so advanced you could always use it to teach him about physics.

coldtits · 14/01/2010 19:30

no it's perfect. Your nan has her head screwed on.

EccentricaGallumbits · 14/01/2010 19:31

2 and a bit advanced for a top?

YABVU to actually tell someone their present is 'too young' - even if it was - which it isn't - Very Ver bad manners.

pagwatch · 14/01/2010 19:31

ROFL at a child under 5 being 'too advanced' for a spinning top. a very strange position to take. Spinning tops have nothing to do with intelligence or abilities -
They are strangely pretty and slightly compelling things to most children under 5 or so.

The money she spends is not a waste as long as she feels she is giving wanted gifts. The only point at which is becomes wasted is when you tell her you don't like them.

In future keep quiet and tell her they are perfect.
It is a simple matter of manners and kindness.

TBH I am a bit that you told her that her gift was no good. What were you trying to achieve?

JaneiteIsAWimpyTeacher · 14/01/2010 19:32

YABU. 'Advanced for his age' at two? Christ. Have you got his Oxbridge application in yet?

Anyway, spinning tops are FAB - adds it to 40th present ideas list.

I can't believe you told her it was wrong. Don't be surprised when he gets nothing next year.

overmydeadbody · 14/01/2010 19:32

a 2 yr old is not too advanced for a spinning top! Even a very advanced 2 yr old wouldn't be.

My DS collects spinning tops, has done since he was about 2, he is now 6 and still loves them and loves spinning them.

Do you realise spinning tops are actually quite hard to get to spin and playing with them improves fine motor co-ordination?

YABU and mean

diedandgonetodevon · 14/01/2010 19:33

YABU- at 2 he really is not too old and will probably love it.

kinnies · 14/01/2010 19:33

Hang on, op hasnt said the gift giver was upset or if they were happy to change the gift.
I once got a friends child somthing and told the friend what it was. She said thanks but ummm.... "hes not into that so much now, would you mind changing it? If not I could do it if you give me the receipt"
I didnt mind a bit and was happy to give my friends kid what he wanted.

overmydeadbody · 14/01/2010 19:34

And who are you to decide whether or not a toy is one that your DS will play with? Let him decide for himself whether or not he plays with it.

So what if he is car/train mad? Children need variety.

you sound ungrateful and immature tbh.

Pozzled · 14/01/2010 19:34

Yes, YABU. A gift is just that, and should always be received with thanks, even if it gets taken to a charity shop afterwards. Do you want to teach your DS that he can specify what he wants and send gifts back if they don't meet with his approval?

KurriKurri · 14/01/2010 19:35

Most spinning tops seem to say 3 years and over. I'd say a two year old would find something to challenge them in the action required to get it spinning. I think its rather a nice present, you never know he might love it.
I Definitely wouldn't hurt your Nan's feelings just because you don't like it.

TheFallenMadonna · 14/01/2010 19:35

What does he play with?

DS was a bit older when we bought one for him I think.

Eve4Walle · 14/01/2010 19:35

YABU.

Also ungrateful and mean. Don't be so bad-mannered.

My almost-two year old plays with his older sister's spinning top all the time. She doesn't bother with it much now she's 6 but he has wicked fun with it.

maristella · 14/01/2010 19:36

what i wouldnt give to have my grandmothers alive, with their worldly wisdom, unconditional love and scary presents - appreciate her

frogetyfrog · 14/01/2010 19:36

Actually my 8 yo still loves the spinning top! To be honest I like to sit and spin it too. I think its a bit unkind to have told her. I too cant believe you told her youd got enough lavender things - she probably gets really worried buying for you now!! I would!!

TheFallenMadonna · 14/01/2010 19:37

Oh right. Cars and trains.

But he's never had a spinning top. Really, they are great toys. I'd forgotten too until we got one for DS.