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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think if I can't get home from work then I can't go.

155 replies

whatisreasonable · 09/01/2010 16:32

I work at night in a residential home and am due at work tomorrow night. I've called in to advise I may not be able to get there and back and to find out what the procedure is.

I've been advised I will be expected to go above and beyond what I would normally do to get there.

I live in a very rural and isolated location and we don't have a 4wd so the road is undrivable for normal cars outside our house to the main road. (A distance of about 2 miles). We did try and get out today and had to be towed home by a friendly landrover.

I can get a lift in from a friend in 4wd but the only way to get home is to walk 3 miles at 6.30am in the morning.

I'm not really happy doing this. No decisions have been made yet as I need to call tomorrow lunchtime and advise what's happening when we've looked at the road.

What do you think? (I've name changed as I know people from work sometimes look at this site)

OP posts:
gaelicsheep · 09/01/2010 21:54

OP - you mustn't even consider doing that walk in the dark after your shift. Please promise you wont'!

abra1d · 09/01/2010 21:57

I am a keen walker--walked 5 miles round trip to buy milk, soup and newspaperpaper yesterday. Thought nothing of it. Last time it snowed badly we walked and tobogganed the same trip into school.

BUT, walking on icy roads in the dark is not wise. Unlike the town there are no pavements in most rural lanes. If you slip over in the dark it's serious. And that's without lunatic drivers on ice.

Harriedandflustered · 09/01/2010 21:57

Thanks op

I've just realised you're not getting anywhere near enough sleep. Seriously.

Because if you are doing the school run after a night shift then the earliest you can be back in bed is 9am, yes?

And then you are getting up at lunchtime to collect from nursery.

So you're sleeping only around 3 hours when you do night shifts.

That's a real issue IMO, will seriously affect how you operate, and not healthy for you. Is there any way you can arrange care so that you can sleep until school pick up?

Poor you xx

ImSoNotTelling · 09/01/2010 22:03

stupid question alert...

If you are in a rural lane type area, and it's night, how can you see where you're going?

I have bague memories of wandering around in pitch black fields as a teen (can't remember what I was doing there )

I guess take a torch? or is visibility good enough from moon/star/ambient light from wherever?

ImSoNotTelling · 09/01/2010 22:04

*vague not bague

Wastwinsetandpearls · 09/01/2010 22:05

3 mile walks are not equal IMO.

I live in a rural area, my house is isolated and I would be required to walk along a major road that has no footpath. It would be suicidal. If this is the case for the OP she should not be walking especially with ice and snow in the dark.

gaelicsheep · 09/01/2010 22:09

ISNT - sometimes ambient light is enough, but not for any rogue cars to see you and of course you can never guarantee it. All depends on the cloud cover. It would be suicidal to even attempt such a walk without a bloody good torch and a spare set of batteries.

cheeset · 09/01/2010 22:11

those in favour of OP walking alone in darkness in sub zero temperatures tired etc;can you suggest what the OP should do if she slips/falls/gets lost and can't get a reception on her mobile?

herbietea · 09/01/2010 22:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Wastwinsetandpearls · 09/01/2010 22:13

I agree, we have no lighting on our road.

I was walking the dog a while back on a neighbouring hill and rather stupidly was not watching the time. I only had to walk down the road for five minutes in the dark - which is full of bends - and I was nearly hit a few times and drivers were understandably angry with me

ravenAK · 09/01/2010 22:13

OP, sorry if you've said & I missed it, but how isolated is your walk home - if you fell & broke an ankle say - how likely is it that someone else would see you do it, or be along within a short space of time?

Sounds bloody dangerous to me! YANBU.

Obviously a 3 mile walk with other people around would be a reasonable expectation; even if there were two of you walking I'd think that fair enough, but under these circumstances they are unreasonable to expect it.

IggiBurns · 09/01/2010 22:17

Your employers have a duty of care regarding you, getting you a lift/taxi home would seem perfectly reasonable. Or not expecting you to come in. I understand them not wanting everyone to be off at drop of hat but this is clearly not the case if you have a 3 mile walk.

Original poster
whatisreasonable · 09/01/2010 22:19

Harried and flustered - Thank you for your concerb but I work very part time just one night a week but different nights depending on the rota. During school holidays I get gp's to have children. From this term we are going have playdates for 2 year old to alternate with a friend. However I will need to go with her the first couple of times on days that am not working so in a few weeks time I should get until 3pm.

Will definatley NOT walk home, will look at alternatives and speak to boss with more clarified position.

Thank you for all your help its been great to hear everyones opinions and stories. Really appreciate it.

Off to bed now.

OP posts:
ImSoNotTelling · 09/01/2010 22:22

Well then you would need to wear reflective vest.

So reflective vest, torch, good hiking shoes, country lanes with no pavements, ungritted, we don;t know how deep snow is, very few people passing if anything happens, possibility of snow while making journey, sub zero temperatures, dark maybe limited visibility/not able to see where going without torch.

I wouldn't do it sounds like madness to me.

Someone earlier said someone they knew walked 2.5 miles in 35 mins in snow - that's 5mph in adverse conditions. Normal walking speed is around 3mph (average) so maybe 2mph in snow and ice maybe less. The person they know must be supercharged I guess

AnnieLobeseder · 09/01/2010 22:22

Perhaps I think nothing of it because I have lots of flashing lights, head torch, high-viz clothing, good grippy walking and running shoes... I would consider myself qutie safe. I forget that not everyone necessarily has these things lying around.

I also agree with the posters who say you should wait until it's light to start walking, but it gets light only a little after 7am now so not long to wait.

I still reckon that a lot of people are taking the piss and not going to work when they're quite capable of getting there.

Could your DH not do the school run before work? He might be late but he'd still be at work, and I don't think anyone is doing full days at the moment. Then you could get a bit more sleep.

BTW, I didn't say my job was demanding at all. Just, apparently, essential. Farmers depend on us getting diagnostic tests done so they can import and export animals. We stop work, no animal movement, lots of money lost, and farmers have a hard enough time as it is.

gaelicsheep · 09/01/2010 22:25

Annie - aren't you forgetting about the idiot drivers who could easily skid into you? I can never understand people walking down roads with no pavements in these conditions. And they always stand far too close to the road when stopping to let you past. It terrifies me.

Missus84 · 09/01/2010 22:25

Harriedandflustered - not really about being fit enough to walk three miles is it? Walking on an unlit, icy road in the dark is foolish, regardless of your fitness level. If you were a driver and came round a bend on an ungritted road on a dark morning to be confronted by someone walking along wouldn't you think they were stupid to risk it?

ImSoNotTelling · 09/01/2010 22:28

You are aware annie that your average standard person does not go in for that type of activity? Donning loads of protective equipment and heading out into the night in subzero temperatures in the middle of nowhere for a laugh?

A bit like me saying "well I can't understand why you don't want to swim across a lake to get to work I would do it in a flash... Oh yes I forgot I am a member of the walrus club

cheeset · 09/01/2010 22:29

it gets light a little after 7am? your having a laugh After 8ish more like! check bbc weather site for more exact time.

Missus84 · 09/01/2010 22:29

I'd also be worried about drivers skidding.

Anyway you look at it, it's a risky activity. No job is worth taking that big a risk for, especially when you have little children at home.

cheeset · 09/01/2010 22:30

ImSoNotTelling lol

AnnieLobeseder · 09/01/2010 22:30

Fair point ISNT. Yes, I do like running through the woods in the dark, and snow and rain just make it more fun for me. I forget that others aren't quite so.... well, you fill in an appropriate adjective!

Doodleydoo · 09/01/2010 22:30

don't go walking in the snow!

I appreciate that many people think the op should walk in the snow the 3 miles home, but please have a look at the link, it is not a very nice story and in 4.5 hours made a huge difference!

OP - it seems very u of your employers who obviously know you live in a slightly more rural place than some of your colleagues. Due to the adverse weather perhaps it would be possible to swap shifts with someone else and do more when you are able to and the weather isn't so crap. It isn't just the 3 mile walk, there are stupid idiots on the road, sub zero temps and also snow drifts. With the proper equipment you would be daft to do it, without it insane. I am sorry but that is just my humble opinion.

Wastwinsetandpearls · 09/01/2010 22:31

Just to add to the complications there is no mobile signal near us either. So if something happened I could be left stranded for ages

AnnieLobeseder · 09/01/2010 22:31

cheeset - I run in the mornings, and by 7 it is well light enough to not even need a torch.

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