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AIBU?

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Original poster

to sell the xbox my son got for christmas to pay his phone bill?

133 replies

fatkatyslim · 06/01/2010 09:12

just checked my bank account and my sons phone bill has gone out,£178!!!
phone was a gift for his birthday and i pay the £30 monthly for chores he does around the house.i phoned vodafone and they have confirmed he has been downloading games,he was given the phone on the trust that this would not happen.so,do i sell his xbox?

OP posts:
Original poster
fatkatyslim · 06/01/2010 09:34

i have spoken to him,he said " it was only a few games!" .he said he knew how much they cost but didn't realise how many he had downloaded.

OP posts:
fiveisanawfullybignumber · 06/01/2010 09:36

If you warned him not to do it, then his Xbox is fair game IMHO. Although you won't get what you paid for it. Possibly confiscate it till the bill is repaid, then you wont loose out financialy.
So many kids nowdays do whatever the want because parents are so soft. Probably gonna get a flaming here but what the hell. My views seem to be different to most peoples.
We work on action and consequence here, seems to work quite well. Even rebellious 17 yr is now knuckling down and revising well for his A levels.

cat64 · 06/01/2010 09:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MrsRigby · 06/01/2010 09:37

NYANBU

Sell the xbox and take away the mobile.

LoveBeingAMummyKissingSanta · 06/01/2010 09:37

Agree with sleeping lion, now is the age to start getting him to think this through. Would have suggested car washing but looking out the window not a wise idea.

fiveisanawfullybignumber · 06/01/2010 09:37

Also, I would get him a pay as you go phone, keep the contract one for yourself or use it for household calls. 13 is very young for that amount of responsibility really.

MmeLindt · 06/01/2010 09:38

Selling the Xbox so soon after Christmas would mean that you lose a lot of money on it.

I would confiscate the Xbox and put a limit on the phone.

Can he get a Saturday job to help pay for the bill?

WingedVictory · 06/01/2010 09:38

Kids are very stupid about this sort of thing. One ad I have seen, for a ringtone download thingie, costs guess how a week?

WingedVictory · 06/01/2010 09:39

"just" £4.50 a week.

WingedVictory · 06/01/2010 09:39

A week. FFS.

MattBellamysMuse · 06/01/2010 09:39

When I was on Vodafone they capped my call limit for some reason at £70, which I didn't know about till I reached the limit and my phone wouldn't work.
So I found myself on holiday in Spain on my own with a six-month-old baby, DP working in the middle east and NO PHONE. I was not happy.

WingedVictory · 06/01/2010 09:42

Plus network operator charges (for WAP to download).

The use of "only" and "just" in advertising is disingenuous at the best of times, for adults, but for kids it really takes the p*.

oldernowiser · 06/01/2010 09:43

You are MAD to get a teenager a contract phone! It's open season on your bank account. I'd take his phone away, get him a pay as you go, give him a regular allowance to use for top ups and get out of the ontract as soom as possible

Marne · 06/01/2010 09:48

This is the reason why we refused to get dss a contract phone. I would say at 13 he is too young for a contract phone and its your fault for letting him have one , on the other hand he should know better not to run up such a high bill. Take the phone off of him.

TheFartShow · 06/01/2010 09:49

a word of warning about the contract phones. a friend of mine got one for her teenager. it was capped. BUT only for a certain time, which was not spelt out to them. The child in question could use the phone until said limit, so took no notice and carried on using it until there was a bill for £350 for a month! It was about 4 years ago so things may have changed, but do check that the limit is forever or until you decide to change it. I think theirs was for the first 6 months or year or something then reverted to normal.

They were furious.

Original poster
fatkatyslim · 06/01/2010 09:49

i got him a contract phone as he was using his credit up in a day and then mithering for more money to top it up.he had to earn it but in the meantime my home phone bill went through the roof.home phone bill is now back to normal.

ok,i have taken away his phone and xbox and he is grounded for a month.he's gutted as he had planned a sledging day with his friends due to schools being shut.

will definately get his phone capped,thanks for all your replies.feeling slighlty calmer now

OP posts:
KimiLovesHerFamily · 06/01/2010 09:49

I would never give a child a contract phone.

Take the phone away from him and sell his stuff, he needs to learn all be it the hard way that he needs to be responsible

MoreSpamThanGlam · 06/01/2010 09:50

I would sit down and show him your income and expenditure...including savings. This is an EXCELLENT chance to show him the value of money and how it works. Then ask him where he thinks you should get the money from.

Then discuss how much you have to do to earn your money and then allocate chores with a payment for each one until he pays it off (car cleaning, gardening, hoover house, clean out fridge, bathroom etc etc).

MrsRigby · 06/01/2010 09:57

fatkatyslim he is your child so feel free to bring him up how you like, but, if this was my child, regardless of how much money I would lose I would sell the xbox and take away the mobile completely. I would never give my DS a mobile and definately not a contract.

If he wants a mobile then he should pay for it, if he can't then no mobile. Simple.

13 year olds don't need mobiles. I'm 30 and I don't even need a mobile.

MrsRigby · 06/01/2010 09:59

Totally agree with kimilovesherfamily.

BrahmsThirdRacket · 06/01/2010 09:59

Yes I think you should sell his Xbox. His irresponsibility has made you broke for this month! That is a big deal. He's not going to understand that unless there are consequences. You won't get what you paid for the Xbox, but at least it will make some of the money back. I think if you say he has to make the money back through chores then a) he won't do enough chores to make the money back and b) it's not actually making you money is it?

Agree that he shouldn't have been given a contract phone - if he runs out of money on his pay as you go that is his tough shit. But he is old enough to take responsibility for this - it sounds like he knew exactly what he was doing. I really think some people are too soft on teenagers. It's not 'unfair' to take his Xbox off him, it's completely fair. He did something which he was expressly told not to do and it's cost you a lot of money.

fernie3 · 06/01/2010 10:00

when my sister did this my dad made a list of things she had to do to pay it off (things like washing, ironing, cleaning etc) she didnt get the phone back until she had paid off what she owed. seemed to work because even now at 23 she is terrified of phone bills!

MrsRigby · 06/01/2010 10:03

Well said brahmsthirdracket, bloody well said.

cleanandclothed · 06/01/2010 10:05

Why was your home phone bill through the roof? Was he phoning other mobiles? Does he know how much it cost per minute to do that? Why don't you get him on to research how much each sort of call costs and find a way to do it cheaply - moneysavingexpert has some good tips, for instance I use www.18185.co.uk so that calls to mobiles are 6p/min and daytime calls to landlines are just a 5p connection charge.

cleanandclothed · 06/01/2010 10:05

Why was your home phone bill through the roof? Was he phoning other mobiles? Does he know how much it cost per minute to do that? Why don't you get him on to research how much each sort of call costs and find a way to do it cheaply - moneysavingexpert has some good tips, for instance I use www.18185.co.uk so that calls to mobiles are 6p/min and daytime calls to landlines are just a 5p connection charge.