Have just had a huge row with a friend over DS finding his willy!!

[JacksmamaInAPearTree]

DS (22 months) has found his willy. He's found that it wees (to his huge amusement) and that if he plays with it, it will (in the way of all penises ) stand up and it feels good. Also hugely amusing, and, IMHO, completely normal.

I don't quite know how this came up when talking to a friend today. She has a DD a tiny bit younger than DS. And she said that I shouldn't let him play with his willy because if I did, he'd turn into one of those boys who expose themselves in the school yard . WTF?? And that normal babies shouldn't be pleasuring themselves (thereby implying there was something wrong with my DS.)

So I asked what she thought her DD was doing when she scoots up to the post in the middle of the room and hugs it and wriggles. She completely freaked out and called me a filthy-minded cow , whereupon I called her a hypocrite - this being the woman who felt free to tell me that her Rabbit got quite a workout when she was expecting her DD as her DH was too tired for sex at the end of his work day.

I don't know whether to laugh or be . As I can be a bit squeamish when discussing sex it's a novelty to be called a filthy-minded cow .

But AFAIK it's normal for toddlers to discover their bits and play with them, and provided it's not done out in public or to an abnormal extent, I see nothing wrong with it! I leave DS to it when he plays with his willy in the bath and he loses interest in about a minute... it's not like he's obsessing with it.

AIBU?

She's nine Lizzy but thankfully doesn't do it anymore in public. I used to be pissed up laughing at her father when he would bring her home after having her for the weekend, 'she was doin that thing again in front of everyone'. He thought it very embarrassing altogether! Oh how I laughed hearing how he tried to stop her instead of just letting her be. Idiot

YANBU. My DS likes to fit things on his willy (like bath toys etc), and you feel a right fool saying 'ds, take the eh off your willy please'

YANBU my ds is nearly 5 and loves being naked and flapping his willy around. i do usually tell him to do it in his room as its not the sort of thing you do around other people, but its perfectly normal and natural for them to 'play'

DS1 was obsessed with his willy at one point. I once caught him playing with it while very big - he was in the buggy and we were in M&S, it was fully exposed

My 14mo DS plays with his 'wee willy winkie'. I just say with a giggle 'no play with winky sweetheart, you'll be doing that enough when you get older'

I think nothing of it. He wants to know what the little thing down there that changes when touched is, and so, has a right good YANK! His daddy is the one who really doesn't like it. I do laugh at him!

I remember when I started school aged four comparing winkies and woohoos and we all turned out perfectly normal. It's just one of those things isn't it?

YANBU at all!
perfectly normal stage of development and people who have issues later in life (flashing or worse) ar often those who have been brought up to think of sex or genitalia as dirty or disgusting.
At most would gently remind him not to do it in public

my little boy 2and 9 months and mid potty training so naked from waist down a lot when at home but he is constantly playing with his willy i just tend to ignore but my partner tells him not to do this not sure which is the best way to deal with this problem

By far the cheapest and best played with toy.

Your friend sounds quite disturbed. Its really an abnormal reaction.

YANBU

Pagwatch - that is so funny.

DD announced the other day that she wanted to go and buy a willy, she is jealous that DH and DS has one and she wants one.

is NO ONE else wondering why the op's friend has a post in the middle of the room????

LOL ChasingSquirrels I did actually wonder that (just didn't post the questions)!!

So go on tell us why does your friend have a post in the middle of the room?

ds is three and a half and occasionally loves to play with winkie. is normal. I just stop him if he gets it out when guests are over.

PMSL at "why does she have a post in the middle of her room". She lives in an old converted farm house, or maybe it used to be the barn (it's certainly cold and draughty enough) and it's a load-bearing post so couldn't be removed. It's fairly useful for attaching the surround-sound speakers and Christmas decorations!

I rang her up earlier this evening to see if she was speaking to me again... the, er, reception was rather frosty .

Cow.

YANBU. Ds (5m) discovered his a few weeks ago. Funny in the bath, less funny during nappy changes as the hand goes to the willy then straight into the mouth
Am now the fastest wetwipe draw in the west as a result.

JUst nearly wet myself laughing at this one, YANBU they all do it, hell I'd probably be worried if they didn't. My DD1 now 10 use to rub everytime she was out in then car seat, as she got bigger she did it in shopping trollys as well, pretty much anywhere with a strap betwen her legs but she grew out of it and at 10 she definately dioesn't go around exposing herself at school either!

I definately recall my younger brothers doing similar things, in fact my youngest brother (also not a flasher or pervert) used to pull on it like it was chewing gum or something, the family joke was he was trying to make it bigger lol he was only 2 or younger at the time, it was realy accessable coz he was being toilet trainied.

I would worry more if they didn't.

Although I have started to explain to DD (5yrs) as she lies legs akimbo in front of the TV with her hands in her pants that somethings are best done in private!

my ds1 played happily for his for a couple of months but then lost interest. ds 2 loves his !!!! let them play. they grow out of it(well in public anyway!!!). ds2 also found it very funny that it wees!!! sometimes the boys will see whos got the biggest when they share a bath but thats about as far as it goes!! let him play

My DS had a phase of furious fiddling at around 2. We just gently explained that you didn't do this in public or in front of visitors.

This led to a day when a friend was visiting and DS behaved beautifully throughout. As she was saying goodbye DS looked up at us and said in a loud voice, as clear as a bell, 'Can I fiddle'? Fortunately she was extremely laid back about it!

He is now quite civilised and just has a quiet fiddle in the bath every so often, which I would say was normal behaviour for males of all ages

Don't worry about it!

my eldest used to stick his finger up his arse! Your friend would have had a bloody heart attack!!!

ds (4) has been trying to stretch his so he can 'lick it'
yanbu. She deffo has some ishoos

Maybe you should show her this

DS always watched TV with his hand down his trousers, and DD used to pat her Tushy when she was tired.

It isn't sexual at that age, it is just a sensation that feels nice (still is IMO!.

Why do boys 'stretch' them? It made me wince when DS used to do it.

I mean, thinking about it (like you do at 7.55 on a school morning), That is definately not sexual is it, I don't know of it being a regular fella request to give it a good stretch!

I don't have a boy but I've seen (and winced) at several friends ds' stretch them and twang them. It has to hurt.
DD was always envious of them and asked if she could have one for christmas. Your friend was DBU.