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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think ds Christmas list is asking for too much ?

72 replies

billynomatesmum · 13/12/2009 12:04

Background is this

Ds is almost 7. Last year top of his Father Christmas list was a nintendo ds which he got as his main present. Just lately his younger sibling who is 4 has been wanting to play on it too so they have had to take turns. (This currently nicely limits the time they each have and encourages sharing).

Top of Ds's Christmas list this year is an Xbox 360 then he wants a particular game for it but then he added "a red nintendo ds" to his list as the next item and is telling his younger sibling that "after Christmas you can have my old nintendo ds because I'm getting a new one".

Now I'm absolutely against two major electronic games console purchases at the same time like this but Dh seems to have no opinion one way or the other so I've brought it to the court of MN for opinions.

Funding the Christmas list is not a problem but it seems "greedy", for want of a better word, to me and I want to try and explain to ds why that letter will not be floating up the chimney in post combustion particles until it has been cut back by one games console.

Some of his classmates are getting TV's for their bedroom plus asking for mobile phones and there will no doubt be comparisons of who got what, in the playground in January.
Other stuff on his list is fairly small and doesn't cost much. He has also enquired politely after Father Christmas's health and added a PS "please don't forget the poor pepole (sic)"

What do you think, am I being unreasonable ?

OP posts:
kormachameleon · 13/12/2009 12:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JaneiteMightBite · 13/12/2009 12:08

Fine for him to ask but not for him to get. I hate this assumption that things must be updated or replaced all the time when a 'new' version comes out.

So what if there will be comparisons in the playground. Christmas is not a competition about how much money is spent - and if children think it is then that is very, very wrong imho.

And at almost 7, even one games console is more than many of that age will have.

DoesntChristmasDragOn · 13/12/2009 12:08

I wouldn't get both a DS and an XBox. I'd be tempted to get DS1 an XBox and DS2 his own DS.

(DD, 4 in Feb, is getting her own DS for Christmas to stop her borrowing mine)

tinierclanger · 13/12/2009 12:08

Oh my god YABU. No WAY should any child get two presents of that magnitude for Christmas. I don't know how you get the message across though, good luck! (DS is only 16m so we haven't run into this yet).

Sweet of him to put the other stuff in the letter though. He sounds lovely.

tinierclanger · 13/12/2009 12:08

Ooops, YANBU!

FiveGoMadInDorset · 13/12/2009 12:09

My Grandmother always told us to put anything we wanted on our Christmas list, but never to expect anything from it as it might get lost on the way to FC.

I wouldn't but them I don't like to many e;ectronic gadgets.

MUTTletoe · 13/12/2009 12:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

magentadreamer · 13/12/2009 12:14

If his one year old Nintendo DS is in perfect working order then why on earth are you replacing it? My DD got her's 5 years ago, still works and won't be replaced till it breaks. Buy your 4 year old one if sharing is a problem. Sweet of your DS to demand £300+ of electronics and think of the poor. A list is surely suggestions for Santa not a I will get list, or it is in my house.

tobago04 · 13/12/2009 12:15

That is too much imo,get ds2 his own ds and d1 the xbox like dcdo said,that way its fair and you've got their main presents sorted,also can't you get covers for ds? Maybe get him a new cover for his old one?

kormachameleon · 13/12/2009 12:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tinierclanger · 13/12/2009 12:17

Hey magenta, steady on, he wrote a list, where does demand come into it?

Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 13/12/2009 12:18

I would get ds2 a nintendo ds and I wouldn't even think about getting the xbox he's 7!

muggglewump · 13/12/2009 12:19

I wouldn't buy the same gift two years running if there was nothing wrong with the first.

I'd buy your DS2 a DS though if that's what he wants.

As for the cost of the gifts, well if you can afford it, then go for it.

magentadreamer · 13/12/2009 12:19

The OP stated her DS had told the younger one he could have the old Nintendo DS - sounds as if he's expecting to get a new one. Apologies if I took that to mean a "demand"

tinierclanger · 13/12/2009 12:22

I wouldn't classify an expectation as a demand. He is a little boy, not a grown man. He probably thinks he will get everything... that's where it's up to OP to explain that the list for Santa is a list of suggestions, not an order book!

TulipsAndTinsel · 13/12/2009 12:22

i'd get him the xbox and younger ds a DS of his own, dd is 4 and is getting one this year as she played with ours til it fell apart! (result beinmg mommy is getting a second hand one too )

ILoveChocolateKnickers · 13/12/2009 12:22

Are there many xbox games for a 7 year old? I thought they were geared for older gamers.

magentadreamer · 13/12/2009 12:25

Agree with you Tinierclanger but I suspect the child will get both.

Original poster
billynomatesmum · 13/12/2009 12:28

Magenta, believe me we are not replacing it if I have anything to do with it !

Janeite - he doesn't want an updated one, just not to have to share his current one and has asked for a different colour so that he knows which one is his.

MUTTletoe - we have very short lists by comparison and the rule in this house is that you can ask for as many things as your age , eg 4 year old has only 4 things on the list but ds has 6. Father Christmas takes things into his own hands to even up the present numbers by recognising what the younger children would benefit from but not think to ask for iyswim. The plan is that by the time the age is high enough to create a list that is too long they will know why it can't be that long or that expensive

They do get "surprises" too and this is always the last thing in the list that they ask for, it is No 4 and No 6 on their respective lists.

OP posts:
DaftApeth · 13/12/2009 12:33

I'd get xbox/wii for both of them and maybe a ds for your ds2.

Also buy them a few games.

I'd also have a conversation withthem both to help managetheir exepctations. We need to do this every year still.

MollieO · 13/12/2009 12:36

Obviously up to you what you buy your dcs but I would have thought that 6 or nearly 7 is too young for an Xbox. I think you will have difficulty getting age appropriate games, although I know people do get their dcs non-age appropriate ones.

I also wouldn't buy a second DS. If you are happy for your 4 yr old to play with the DS then you could get him his own one.

Ds is 5 and had two things on his list!

JaneiteMightBite · 13/12/2009 12:40

Well my 14 and 12 year olds still share one DS.

The 12 year old has four things on her list this year:

  1. a monkey
  2. a Rubik's cube
  3. a t-shirt
  4. a sketch book

That was easy!

I just think that if, aged 6, they are asking for all of this expensive stuff, what on earth will they be expecting aged 12?

TulipsAndTinsel · 13/12/2009 12:40

dd and ds1 are 4 and 3 and have one thing each on their lists [smug]

we get them other non santa presents on top of that but they don't ask for those really so have no expectations

themildmanneredjanitor · 13/12/2009 12:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AllThreeWays · 13/12/2009 12:43

I agree on the age appropriateness of xbox games, there are very few. Playstation and Wii could be better options.

In our home such big purchases are family presents.

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