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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU To think that if you are not on a doner register you should give up any rights to a donated organ?

324 replies

littlemoominmamma · 04/12/2009 14:04

Do you think this would be a reasonable idea? If you have an organ donation card you should be entitled to an organ.... if not then that is your choice?

OP posts:

Hollyoaks · 06/12/2009 14:11

So then, like I asked before, there will always be people who either don't opt in who want to or don't opt out who want to, but which situation would be worse?

Is it not better to save a life unintentionally than letting someone lose theirs because you didn't join the register? Are we really harming the person who didn't opt out but wanted to by donating their organs? Obviously this is still based upon the consent of next of kin, but perhaps it was a discussion that never took place.

noddyholder · 06/12/2009 14:13

You can't specify who gets the organs because there is a huge list of criteria wrt tissue types blood group the height and size ratio of donor to recipient condition of organs age etc.You may assume as his daughter that you will be a perfect match but not neccesarily.When I had my 1st transplant there was another teenage boy had his the same week.Both donated from our mums.Mine lasted 15 years and his failed in 3 months and he went back on the list and got another kidney from an unknown donor and it is still going now 24 yrs on!

LetThereBeRock · 06/12/2009 14:25

Yes I do think it'd be harmful.
As far as I'm concerned my body, my choice, in all things, even after death,and no one else should have the right to dictate that I'll become nothing more than spare parts.

And look at how much distress the Alder Hey scandal caused the families.

alwayslookingforanswers · 06/12/2009 14:27

but hollyoaks - as it stands now even people who optIN can still have their decision vetoed by the family.

Someone pointed out that if it were presumed consent that they would have to be VERY certain that someone hadn't opted out before using the organs/tissue. I wouldn't trust any computer system set up to make sure that the information was accurate and up-todate.

Do they actually check the register when someone dies?

Original poster

littlemoominmamma · 06/12/2009 14:29

Just to be clear.... no-one would be forced. It would be a choice each adult could make for themselves, at any time ..... no element of force, a carrot not a stick.

OP posts:

noddyholder · 06/12/2009 14:35

LTBR I am assuming then that you would refuse an organ if you needed one?

Hollyoaks · 06/12/2009 14:37

Alwayslooking - It was a hypothetical question assuming the family trusts and follows the details on the register. If we had an opt-out system and an individual had not opted out and their family consented to donate their organs what harm would it do?

Letthereberock - the alder hey scandal caused so much grief as nobody had given permission for the organs to be taken and they weren't used for transplants so difficult to compare the two situations. However, I would assume that the majority of people who disagree with donation would opt-out pretty quick if the changes were made. But, for those that didn't what harm would be done realistically. The individual concerned would be dead and so presumably (as thats a whole other debate) never know anything about it and the family would have consented to the donation and so have no issues with it.

If the family consent against someones wishes what is the comeback for the transplant team? Who could argue against the decision?

InMyLittleHead · 06/12/2009 14:39

"no one else should have the right to dictate that I'll become nothing more than spare parts."

But at least as spare parts you would be of some use. What's the point of being ashes?

AMumInScotland · 06/12/2009 14:52

twinkley - what benefit would there be to your dad in you temporarily cancelling your donor card? If you died, and he wasn't going to get your organs, then at least by donating them you would hopefully get one person off the queue. I don't suppose it's a "first in first out" kind of a queue, so that wouldn't mean your dad would move up a place, but still you'd have helped one of the people in the same situation as him, and slightly reduced the list of people waiting. Then maybe the relatives of the person you helped would think about becoming donors themselves, with the possible result of more donors therefore a higher probability of your dad getting offered an organ.

So - even if your organs would not directly go to your dad in the unlikely event of you dying in a suitable way while he needs them, you being a potential donor still benefits him along with all the others who are waiting.

Ladyanonymous · 06/12/2009 14:57

I haven't had time to read the whole thread so apologies if I am repeating pps.

I have a blood borne virus so am unable to donate blood or my organs even though I would very much like my situation not to be so. It is highly likely I will need a liver transplant at some point in the future, so does this mean I would be "struck off" on the OP's proposed system?

Seems to be a good way of shooting the transplant system in the foot as I suspect many people who need a transplant are unable to due to the very reason they are on the list?!

As there is an acute shortage of suitable organs available (esp livers) due to the amount of alcohol we, as a nation, are drinking I would wholly support an "opt out" system.

misdee · 06/12/2009 14:59

well said amuminscotland.

LetThereBeRock · 06/12/2009 15:22

I'm not going to be ashes. I'm having a green burial.

Actually I am on the organ donor register,and am happy for them to use anything they can, but I still believe that it's our right to dictate what is done with our bodies after death.

The thought that our bodies could become mere commodities and the property of the state,regardless of our wishes, is a disturbing one for me.

LetThereBeRock · 06/12/2009 15:24

Noddy I am on the organ donor's list and when I die, if I am a suitable candidate to harvest organs from, I wouldn't,in life, care if one or all of the people I donated to were not on the list.

Hollyoaks · 06/12/2009 15:25

But that won't occur, if you don't agree with donating your organs you opt out and inform your loved ones. Your wishes will be considered, except in those few instances where someone helps to save a life unintentionally.

LetThereBeRock · 06/12/2009 15:29

But as ALFA keeps saying not everyone will be aware of the right to opt out, or the means, just as not everyone is all that aware of, or knows how to join the organ donor register.

expatinscotland · 06/12/2009 15:43

YABU.

I am on the donor registrar and I don't give a toss if the person who might get anything I have to use donates his/her what-have-you or not.

I'll be dead and beyond all that.

Besides, tbh, the very idea put forth by the OP strikes me as spiteful.

I wouldn't give a pound coin as a gift with conditions, why would I do that with my organs/skin/long bone/corneas/whatever else is of use to someone else?

Hollyoaks · 06/12/2009 15:51

So, do you think it would be worse to take someones organs who did not consent in life but their family consented for them than it is for someone who wished to donate but their family didnt consent?

For me, when your dead your dead, if you didn't take your name of the list for whatever reason, its not doing you any harm now. Why are you so worried that peoples organs will be taken against their wishes if their family are fine with it?

JjandtheBean · 06/12/2009 15:57

not sure how i feel about this,

i can see it from the point of view that 2 patients need organs, ones donor, ones not, that the donor is maybe, erm, more deserving, for want of a better word.

BUT

when ds was critically ill under no circumstances did i want my precious baby on the donor list, how does it work out then?

LetThereBeRock · 06/12/2009 16:13

I don't believe that family should be able to go against the deceased's wishes, if they wished to donate or if they didn't.

That said preventing the family from making the final decision does also pose some problems and ethical issues.

alwayslookingforanswers · 06/12/2009 17:19

"For me, when your dead your dead, if you didn't take your name of the list for whatever reason, its not doing you any harm now. Why are you so worried that peoples organs will be taken against their wishes if their family are fine with it?"

See doesn't that already happen? Were ALL of the people whose body parts were used after they died on the register? If not - then why DO we have a register - how is actually used (I have looked on the website several times, and asked on this thread - and no-one has answered me yet).

"What" is the register actually for? As being on it doesn't mean that your organs/tissue will be used. Or even that they're all "suitable" donors that are on it does it?

And as it stands family can override the decision anyhow (if they're actually asked - ShelleyLou's family weren't asked when her DB died recently - and that's not the first time I've heard of families not being asked).

What happens if someone is on the list - and there's no family/next of kin to ask?

NeedCoffee · 06/12/2009 17:36

not sure if posted as not read the whole thread but if you have a Boots advantage card you can register through that.

here

Hollyoaks · 06/12/2009 17:43

Is this list not just there as a guide for families who weren't sure of their relatives wishes?

StrictlyKatty · 06/12/2009 17:49

I assuming OP doesn't mean that for under 18's....

serinBrightside · 06/12/2009 18:10

I have donated over 50 units of blood but am not on the organ donor register. I would trust my relatives to make a decision about this at the time. If I was actually dead then no problem, if I was still 'alive' and the organs were to be 'harvested' then I am not sure how they would feel.

Where does that leave me then Littlemoominmama?

Original poster

littlemoominmamma · 06/12/2009 18:19

Serinbright - if you have already made the decision to donate, why not join the register? ................ I don't really understand what you are asking? ......... Let your family know your wishes.

OP posts:

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