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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To sink into depression after watching supernanny

71 replies

fernie3 · 19/11/2009 14:08

My husband and two older children have gone away for a whole week (!) on holiday with his mum. I am left at home with our baby (who is too little to enjoy a canoing holiday). My baby is happily napping and I turned on the TV to see supernanny.

I have never been so depressed about life!. Does anyone in real life spend all day playing?
and do these people have cleaners? my house hasnt looked that tidy EVER. Also the children who were supposed to be out of control didnt look that bad to me. Whats wrong with letting kids make a mess and play on their own?

where have I gone wrong!!

OP posts:
Iklboo · 19/11/2009 14:10

It is not asseptabul to be depressed after watching supernanny

IMoveTheStarsForNoOne · 19/11/2009 14:10

I think the general consensus will be that YABU to watch supernanny

Original poster
fernie3 · 19/11/2009 14:14

I have never watched supernanny before is it bad all I wanted to to was watch tv and crochet a hat, now I see I should have been doing "productive play" instead.

OP posts:
pjmama · 19/11/2009 14:16

I used to quite like Supernanny... then I had kids

When I read her saying in a magazine that fussy eaters are made that way by their parents, I wanted to give her a good hard slap but I was too busy scraping shepherd's pie and veg into the bin at the time.

Seuss · 19/11/2009 14:18

watching tv in the day?? To the naughty step with you!

Pitchounette · 19/11/2009 14:18

Message withdrawn

Original poster
fernie3 · 19/11/2009 14:20

The worst part is that I got up to get a drink and put the crochet hook down and its just vanished (in the tip that is my house). So now I have watched supernanny AND I have a half finished hat!

OP posts:
mrscrocoduck · 19/11/2009 14:28

I think she's on the ball

JemL · 19/11/2009 14:34

I want Supernanny to have children. I want to see her resorting to all the tacticts (threats, bribery, pleading) which she has spent years lecturing other parents about.

IMoveTheStarsForNoOne · 19/11/2009 14:35

iklboo

hee, she does wind me up with her weird ways, but I have to say that some of the techniques are working with DS (the annoying getting down to his level and explaining stuff...)

PeedOffWithNits · 19/11/2009 14:36

her methods work, most of the time the kids behaviours ARE the product of parent behaviours - so they are trying to get attention because they get none, or are playing up because they are too tired/thirsty to be dragged round tesco, or are pushing the boundaries cos threats are never carried out, or are on a chemical high cos of the crap they are fed etc

but i can't stand the way she says "asseptabul"

to whoever said about putting shepherds pie in the bin. dont . offer it at the next couple of meals with no alternative and no snacks instead. they will eat it!

Iklboo · 19/11/2009 14:38

Yeah - I want to see how 'productive' she feels after 2.5 hours sleep, walking round with Readybrek in her hair
DS would much rather play on his won than with me anyway. Mummy is for cuddles, kisses and lovely boobies. So says DS and I'm sticking with it

PeedOffWithNits · 19/11/2009 14:38

jem is right - if she has kids she will find it different. friend of mine had worked as a private nanny for 20 yrs before having a baby herself, and could not believe the way the emotional bond interfered with what she knew and had always successfully used as the right way to train them to go to sleep etc

Iklboo · 19/11/2009 14:39

Play on his own - a won is not some strange musical instrument or anything

jobhuntersrus · 19/11/2009 14:40

I don't agree with all that she says and does but she does seem to get results. She has no children of her own though so can have no idea about the emotional aspects of it imo. If she had kids of her own I think she would understand why it is not as easy as all that.

Original poster
fernie3 · 19/11/2009 14:41

PeedOffWithNits I agree about the methods she used to get the kids to behave etc, we have used some of them for a long time, getting down on their level etc. What depressed me was the routine on the wall thingy. If I had to live by a routine like that I would probably kill within 48 hours.

I think I have been lucky with my kids so far in that they have always been quite well behaved although my son does have this thing about weeing on the floor

OP posts:
thumbwitch · 19/11/2009 14:43

I admit I used to find Supernanny strangely compulsive viewing - until I had DS. I still catch it very occasionally but I am more sceptical of some of her tactics now and think, like others, that she might have trouble putting them into practice herself when she has her own.

I don't think I ever found it depressing though.

I also let DS do lots of free play - I know when he's had enough of it because it becomes "naughty" play, or he comes and grabs me for "cuds" (cuddle). Actually, he has taken to grabbing my finger(s) in a vice like grip and leading me forcibly away from MNing working to play or sit with him. (he's nearly 2)

Tee2072 · 19/11/2009 14:45

The one and only time I have ever watched Supernanny was when I was in the hospital having my son. He was a CS and was in SCBU for several days. I was still recovering and it was the only thing on.

It made me cry.

I am still not sure if it was hormones or the fact that I was thinking 'well the kids are brats, but at least they aren't in an incubator!'

Jujubean77 · 19/11/2009 14:48

I do like her but after I watched an episode where the Mum just popped a little spoon of food to her 2 yo at mealtime and SN went ballistic at her "HE IS TOO YOUNG FOR FEEDING THAT IS NOT ASSEPTABLE" the Mother looked to the floor and said "oh sorry is that a no-no".

On the same episode she waltzed in and threw all the bottles into the bin "NO NO NO". The child was only 2 FFS I thought she was all wrong; her rules don't bend from family to family they are too black and white.

Poohbearsmom · 19/11/2009 14:52

Part of me wishes she wud turn up at my door and sort us out... Part of me knows id leave her knocking and go hide...

Jamieandhismagictorch · 19/11/2009 14:58

I quite like some of her techniques, BUT I think she does sometimes over-reach her abilities in dealing with some wider relationship difficulties within the family.

Tee2072 · 19/11/2009 15:00

Juju she said you shouldn't spoon feed a 2 year old?!?!

moonsquirter · 19/11/2009 15:11

Fwiw, I've watched quite often and think that her methods are pretty sensible - and work if carried out consistently. Of course it's difficult when it's your own kids and you have the emotional angle but that's part of being a parent: doing the tough stuff.

Can't pretend I'm that perfect, but stepping back and trying some of her methods sometimes have stopped me and DD getting into a real cycle of bad behaviour. Children do respond well to firm boundaries.

I also do get depressed watching, partly out of sadness for how families have ended up in such messes when the intentions were all good and partly because it reminds me of all the times I get it wrong...

smee · 19/11/2009 15:12

Peedoffwithnits.. do you really do that? ie keep presenting the same food for days afterward and make them eat it?? Each to their own and that's great if it works for you, but I couldn't not note that that's what my mum did to me as a kid and it put me off no end of food - to this day I can't eat meat for that very reason.

Flibbertyjibbet · 19/11/2009 15:15

Not having kids of their own seems to be the main qualification for supernanny and another certain well known child care 'guru'

Whereas we MUMS know different.

jujubean you spelled it wrong
its

ASSET-TIBBLE.

And, OP, if you knew a camera crew was coming round, wouldn't your house be looking spic and span

(someone will be along in a minute to mention supernanny and the getting babies off the breast...)

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