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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To claim a sexual fantasy I don't actually have just because I think DH is taking the piss with his?

99 replies

Maidithappen · 18/11/2009 13:53

Namechanger obviously. I nearly put this in relationships, then I realised I was asking AIBU so I thought here was better.

Back story: together 9 years, married 5. Have two small DCs. I work 2 days per week, DH works 4.

Ever since we have been together, I have done almost all of the housework except cooking the evening meal, which DH has always done. He doesn't mind (and so he bloody shouldn't as I do nearly everything else) and I think the main reason he does it is because he likes to eat earlier, say 7, whereas if I am cooking we're lucky to sit down at 9, what with putting the DCs to bed etc. But, as I say, it's not a problem, although MIL makes the odd dig, like they do.

DH occasionally puts a wash on, sometimes irons. What he hardly ever does, however, is the traditional "man" things. He will cut the lawn, that's about it. As for DIY, decorating, minor repairs, flat pack furniture . . . well either I do it or get someone in. This does irritate me a bit.

Right, back story done. We have been thinking about ways to liven up our sex life (which was good anyway but needed a touch of spice, we thought). I got the idea on here to do the thing where you both act out a fantasy for the other.

DH's was to come home from work and find me cooking dinner dressed as a sexy French Maid. Um . . . . . . so I did, and it was er . . . a great success.

So he has asked me to do it more often. I have done it five or six times now.

The thing is that the last couple of times I suddenly got the feeling that it's actually nothing to do with the outfit, or the sex, that actually he just wants his dinner cooked for him. Call it women's intuition if you like .

So, here's the AIBU - given that I don't really have any fantasy that I want to/could act out with DH, would it be unfair of me to say that my fantasy is to come home and find him in jeans, workman's boots, checked shirt and large tool,belt putting up some shelves or something similar?

I can see this all working out quite well but I feel guilty about being underhand, even though I think he may be himself be being a little less than honest.

OP posts:
mumof2point5 · 18/11/2009 21:22

i haven't laughed so much in a long time.
yanbu!

Maidithappen · 18/11/2009 21:29

mishmashmoon, well the timing was one of the things that led me to believe that the sex side wasn't, erm, the nucleus of the issue.

I feel bad - I have had a quiet night tonight.

DH cooked me a lovely dinner, and we sat and watched TV so Fifi La Frou-Frou* and her "Oooh Monsieur, what 'ave you got zere? It ees so verrry big! Mon Dieu! Let me 'elp you wiz that. And would you like some . . . ow you say? . . . carrots? Zut alors! And what do you Engleesh call Petit Pois? Quelle domage!" etc, has not been required.

  • we don't really call her that. Honest. It's just so you get the jist.
OP posts:
purpleduck · 18/11/2009 21:36

yes!!!
yes!!!!!!
OH, YES!!!!!!!

HerBeatitude · 18/11/2009 22:06

ROFL, how do you keep it up (as it were)?

The french maid thing I mean, obv.

katie3677 · 18/11/2009 22:12

Brilliant. I once told DH that watching him cook for me without his shirt on really turned me on, cue not having to cook for about 6 weeks

sanfairyann · 18/11/2009 22:16

lolol

ThatVikRinA22 · 18/11/2009 22:18

i like.

i have a very leaky tap...(ooooer) am wondering how i can utilize this idea to incorporate plumbers with big spanners...

LeQueen · 18/11/2009 22:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UpYourViva · 18/11/2009 22:32

ROFL

JustAnotherManicMummy · 18/11/2009 22:47

I think LeQueen has quote of the week!

ABetaDad · 19/11/2009 08:08

LeQueen - fanastic. Vote for a quote of the week from me too.

TreeTrunkThighs · 19/11/2009 08:12

Just marking my spot so I can find this easier at work later when I need a

Sidge · 19/11/2009 09:13

Maidithappen I may need you to write me a script

Arwenwasrobbed · 19/11/2009 09:23

Love it - starting to have gardener fantasties

booboo78 · 19/11/2009 11:43

I am completely pmsl!

HerBeatitude · 19/11/2009 20:52

I do think people should make more of an effort to make up a few domestic task-based fantasies for Maidithappen

Maidithappen · 19/11/2009 21:53

Yes, HerBeatitude, I agree.

Fantasies based around the following would be most welcome:

  • flat packed furniture assembly
  • re-painting of door which has been chewed or scratched by previous house owners' pet dog/cat/toddler/vampire
  • replacement of washer in bathroom tap. Scope for spraying and ooh-let-me-help-you-out-of-those-wet-things with this one.
  • toilet seat replacement (perhaps not my first choice)
  • re-decoration of bedroom. Wallpaper paste, a sturdy trestle and a good stripper will all be useful tools for those of us handy with a double-entendre.
OP posts:
carrieboo75 · 19/11/2009 22:15

Love it, what a great way to get the jobs done

Bramshott · 19/11/2009 22:24

I am crying with laughter Maidit!

Poledra · 19/11/2009 22:25

ROFL!

I think you need to make that a steam stripper, OP.

LeQueen · 19/11/2009 22:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mezley · 19/11/2009 22:43

No one evr shot their husbabd etc

ABetaDad · 19/11/2009 22:47

LeQueen - "No woman ever shot her husband whilst he was washing the dinner pots."

That made me LOL this morning and at your 'male psyche' comment elsewhere too.

LeQueen · 19/11/2009 22:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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