to think that BF beyond 6 months is not exactly hard?

[lowrib]

DISCLAIMER! Let me be very clear - I'm not saying that BF is easy full stop - I know from experience it can be very bloody painful (I got blocked ducts and mastitis - ouch!) and I in no way mean to underplay the considerable achievements of many mums in establishing BF in the who first place in difficult circumstances. Nor am I having a go at people who choose - or have no choice but to use formula.

But ... once BF is established and you, your baby and your body are all used to it, it's hardly hard work to carry on, is it?

I'm asking because I keep coming across people who seem surprised that I'm "still" feeding my DS at 11 months, and either congratulate me - or say as "Are you still feeding him" . The WHO recommends 2 years and we're not even half way there ffs!

The last person actually said "Are you still BF lowrib? You wanna get him off the boob!"

If my DS is hungry, or tired, or needing comfort, I simply put him on my boob and he's happy. How is that in any way harder than faffing around with bottles and making up formula, or worrying about how long it's been out of the fridge or warming up milk when out and about?

I think the subtext behind the "get him off the boob" comment was so that I could have a proper drink. Look, my social life for the last 20 years has revolved around heavy drinking (and I've thoroughly enjoyed it, for the most part), but hello, I'VE HAD A BABY!!! I think it's a pretty bloody sad reason to give up BF - for some boozy nights down the pub. The pub will always be there, but my little one won't be a baby long.

I don't think this is what everyone means though. So what are they on about? Why is it such a big deal? Is it the social stigma? Do people find it easier to move on to bottles because they feel it's what's expected of them? It's a pretty bloody sad indictment of our society if so. Women should be celebrated for BF, don't you think? Not made to feel like bloody social lepers.

Sorry for the long post, feel a bit ranty this morning

I BF DD til she was two in the end stopped admitting to it in public (I was only feeding her in the morning by then so no one saw). The reactions I got were akin to admitting I was some sort of weirdo. I just felt it was easier to keep quiet. In fact the reactions I go were quite similar to the looks of distaste I got for bottlefeeding my 1st DS. Strange isn't it you breastfeed for too short a time and it's wrong and you breastfeed for too long and it's wrong ! You just can't win !

Possibly because bfing is restrictive not just re drinking.

suppose it's not so long ago that people weaned a couple opf months before 6mo as they had to go back to work, so that's seen as the norm. expressing to ex feed a 6 mo can't be easy (sure it's not impossible, but not easy!)

That said, I am feeding ds at 17 months and do agree that if it suits you and your child it doesn't really need thinking about- I intend to feed til we both want to stop. I fed my dd for 10 months and chose to stop as I was just too busy and couldn't cope with all the expressing I had to do. With ds I am a sahm so have none of that pressure.

I know what you mean - have just stopped bf'ing DS at 23mo, mostly because am trying for another baby and it isn't happening yet so trying to remove one potential obstacle.

Had lots of well-meaning types (including MIL) asking when I was going to stop, as though I was some kind of freak for still carrying on. Mind you, I always thought I would stop when his teeth came in but he didn't bite (well, only very occasionally) so I carried on. So much easier! We got it down to night times only when he was 21mo and then it was just a case of getting him to go to sleep without it, which happened really easily (luckily for me) - slight panic the first night, asked for it twice the second night and only once the 3rd night and then no more.

I often get the feeling that everyone thinks they have the right to tell you what is right for YOUR child, regardless of their own knowledge. It's just one of those things - you are the mum and therefore you don't actually know much, so obviously you need someone else to tell you all about your own child. It really pisses me off some days, and other days I am resigned to it.

Depends on whether you have gone back to work or not, whether you have another child etc (thinking demanding toddler for example). But really I guess your friends are just surprised cos it's unusual. Not wrong, of course, just not the norm.

I stopped BF at 6 months as I was going back to work. Yes, I could have expressed, but honestly it was too much of a faff and it probably would have seemed very odd to my colleagues who were all childless (not that I'm saying that we shouldn't be challenging these attitudes, but on top of dealing with the juggling work and childcare, it just seemed a bit much).

Also, DD started getting teeth then and kept biting me.

But if it's working out for you, then fantastic.

I agree expressing at work can't always be too easy! If I was I'd lap up the congratulations! But as I'm still on maternity leave it's really not hard.

Can I just ask, when you go back to work do you have to express during the day, or could you cut back to mornings and evenings - would your supply readjust?

lowrib, i did at 11mo, think 6mo prob too young to go all day with no milk

supply should be fine tho id think., so formula during the day an option

For me, if I only expressed mornings and evenings I would have exploded. Also, I'd have had no milk to actually feed dd with when I was home. It is possible, but dd was in childcare full time from very early on and I had to express to keep up my supply. It was managable as it was a priority but as I got busier (I was at uni rather than work per se) it just wasn't viable. Not to mention the lack of a suitable place to express, I was literally sat expressing on the toilet several times a day.

I BF and couldnt imagine still doing it at 11 months (but i have teeny boobs and imagining a huge baby on them - well it just wouldnt happen) I had to stop - i started drying up at six weeks

Once i stopped and moved on to bottles i realised how much extra you have to do on your own when they are young and only on milk. I enjoyed every minute thoguh. At 11 months i suppose it would be easy if you can still do it when they are eating other things as well. I see nothing wrong with BF up until they are about a year, maybe 18 months depending how big they are. My 13 month old is HUGE (so tall) for his age so even if i still could i prob would have stopped by now anyway.

BF is something that shouldnt need to be celebrated - it is natural and just a part of life. I think it is odd how people make a big deal either way.

Actually I think bf does get a bit more challenging once babies have teeth.

I admit I am a wimp though

But melted chocolate why should it matter how big they are?? An 18 month old is an 18 month old.

I totally agree,it's ludicrous that people give up after a couple of months when the hardest bit is over and it becomes so much easier.

agree it's nothing to do with size

Just because it makes it harder for mum. It isnt something that would bother me even if i saw a HUGE HUGE HUGE 2 year old BF if mum and baby were happy but personally i would stop (this is if it were possible for me to still be BFing) when i felt baby had become too big for me to be comfortable. Having said that i only managed to BF when DS was little and so have no idea what it is like to BF a bigger baby. Maybe if i still could I would want to continue? I dont know.

Like i said, if mum and baby are happy then i see no issue.

fair enough. I haven't had to cradle DS for ages, he tends to just kneel or sit beside me (or lie beside me, but trying to stop that!)

Message withdrawn

YANBU.

But I did drink wine whilst bfing - just less of it. I also took them everywhere with me so that there was rarely an issue with needing to leave feeds at home. If there was I usually used formula as I couldn't express enough. Just took the road of least resistance with everything and, yes, it could't have been easier.

IME, it's easier as they get bigger (and dd was 25lbs at 25 weeks so big was something I got used to pretty quickly). None of that faffing with cushions and sitting just right and blah. They have the dexterity and tone to position themselves while you relax instead of latch checking/adjusting pillows etc.

And I'm the laziest person ever so it must have been easy as I went 17m, 3yrs and about 4 yrs respectively with mine.

I chose to give up bf at 6 months. Conscious decision. Well it was 7 months actaully, but. It is allowed. You are allowed to stop whenever you want, you know !!