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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want my nanny to eat a whole box of chocolates in my fridge?

119 replies

PanicMode · 13/11/2009 14:30

I have had a box of Guylian chocolates (not that it's particularly relevant) in my fridge for a couple of weeks, and my brother was here yesterday, so went to open the box - to find that all bar 8 of them had been eaten. I immediately accused my husband, as he is known to be a bit of a secret treat eater, but he absolutely swears blind that he only had 2.

She's also finished two enormous bags of crisps this week and most of a packet of biscuits. I don't begrudge feeding her breakfast and lunch as her contract states, but is it unreasonable of me to expect her NOT to eat my 'treats'?!

OP posts:
fillybuster · 13/11/2009 16:17

I don't get it. Why shouldn't the OP keep a 'nice' box of chocs in the fridge for an extended period and expect them to be left alone? And what is this obsession with having to eat everything chocolate-related immediately?

I can't stand Guylian but last time I was given a box of Leonidas I think dh and eked them out for about 3 weeks - and I would have been absolutely gutted if my nanny had snarfed the lot.

FWIW, I do buy 'nice' bics for my nanny on a regular basis (we're not a 'snacky' household, so they are just for her). Our nanny has a very sweet tooth whilst dh and I only rarely eat chocs/biscuits and our dcs likewise; I don't see why something that is a bit special/a present shouldn't be left alone - or why my nanny shouldn't buy herself chocolate/crisps if thats what she wants to eat. Obviously I'm not proposing that I or my dcs eat nice things in front of her without sharing!!

btw, I was joking about the empty box. but never mind...

ChunkyKitKat · 13/11/2009 16:23

Does your nanny do a good job? Could you see it as extras for a valued person, not to be taken for granted? Seems a small price to pay for someone who looks after your children.

Maria2007loveshersleep · 13/11/2009 16:26

Fillybuster, sorry but the need to eat something chocolate related immediately can't be explained to someone who has never experienced it

As for the question at hand (if we are to discuss it seriously, which is a bit laughable tbh) for me its the principle for the thing. Anyone in my house (visitors, family members, nanny etc) are welcome to eat anything they fancy. End of. It's basic good manners & hospitality.

(and if I were particularly keen on something that I fancied eating, say, later on, I would just bloody hide it!)

belgo · 13/11/2009 16:27

'I can't stand Guylian but last time I was given a box of Leonidas I think dh and eked them out for about 3 weeks '

You absolutely do not get it do you filly

ChilloHippi · 13/11/2009 16:28

I'd have eaten them too. Don't you know that's it's a crime to keep choclate for that long?

fillybuster · 13/11/2009 16:29

Ah. I've been known to get like that with pickled cucumbers, but that doesn't seem to cause as much social disruption

OK, I agree this thread is ridiculous but I still would expect to be able to leave 'boxed' things in my fridge for an unspecified amount of time and find them there (probably growing odd bits of fluff) at the end of it.

fillybuster · 13/11/2009 16:30
LynetteScavo · 13/11/2009 16:30

Well, is she a large girl? If so, and she was large when you offered her the job, YABU. What do you expect?

Sainsbuys do Guyalin ( well fake ones, but i BET THEY ARE FROM THE SAME FACTORY) as part of their basics range. Go and buy her a stash and tell her to leave yours alone.

I think providing some treats for her is reasonable, buiscuits for example for when she has another nanny round for coffee a play date.

ChilloHippi · 13/11/2009 16:33

OMG Lynette. How fatist are you????!!!!!

stuffitllllama · 13/11/2009 16:33

yup sorry I normally would say yanbu but box of cheap chocs, fridge for two weeks, and you haven't said mind those I'm saving them

not worth getting worked up over unless you want to say Oh my lord you ate all the chocolates I was saving, just so she doesn't do it again

but steaming over it? upsetting her? no don't you are mad to consider it

lesson learned

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 13/11/2009 16:36

Yes Lynette, larger people don't go around feeling they have to eat everything in sight you know!

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 13/11/2009 16:37

It would be a greedy moment if she had eaten 14 in one go - but one a day for two weeks? Not really a big deal. And when you say she finished two packs of crisps were they open?

Ok I do think it's a bit cheeky to eat things like boxes of chocolates if you aren't offered them but it isn't a huge deal. If you don't want her eating certain things you will have to put them away, it would be very weird if she was rooting through cupboards for your snacks!

Maria2007loveshersleep · 13/11/2009 16:39

The need for chocolate has little to do with being large. My DP is a huge huge chocaholic & is one of the thinnest many I know. I know for a fact he cannot leave chocolate alone in the fridge for a day let alone 2 weeks ().

dreamteamgirl · 13/11/2009 16:39

Is nanny live in?

To be honest if she is living in your house then she should be entitled to eat anything that is not clearly set aside

I must admit I was a bit when my AP opened a variety pack type thing- you know the big boxes of Celebrations which I had bought as a Christmas present, but then I figured I had left it in the kitchen and not said it wasnt for consumption, so how could she have known?

That said if she is only with you for 4 hours a day I think helping herself to stuff out of your fridge is a bit cheeky!

MilkNoSugarPlease · 13/11/2009 16:41

"Well, is she a large girl? If so, and she was large when you offered her the job, YABU. What do you expect?"

fucking hell! nice attitude there love...

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 13/11/2009 16:41

LynetteScavo you cheeky bint! Yes, all fat women can't help scoffing everything in sight even if it doesn't belong to them, unlike our slender sisters with willpower and manners. Excuse me, I just have to go scoff some cake, it has been an hour since I last ate and I'm getting faint

MilkNoSugarPlease · 13/11/2009 16:41

not

rookiemater · 13/11/2009 16:42

YABU and I'm not entirely sure what her size has got to do with it, I know some very skinny people who snaffle loads of chocolate.

If you leave opened chocolate around what on earth do you expect ? I was babysitting last Friday night and there was an open box of maltesers with about a third left, took every ounce of my will power not to eat the lot.

Presumably as they were sitting uneaten for weeks on end the nanny assumed you didn't like them and she was doing you a favour by eating them.

LynetteScavo · 13/11/2009 16:42

Do I sound fattist? Sorry - DH is the biggest fattest in the world ever...not that he's exactly thin himself. When I met him he was fattist and a bit homophobic...he's no longer homophobic, so we'll both have to work on the fattist one.

But two things I have observed over time;

Fat people eat more (as in consume more calories) than thin people. (Yes I know it's a complex issue and even loosing a couple of pounds nearly kills me, well, not literally,)

Nannies are (90% of the time) fatter than thier employers. Even if the annnny is slim, the emplyer wlll be Mrs Flat Belly.

I know that's not really relevent to the OP, but hey.

MilkNoSugarPlease · 13/11/2009 16:44
belgo · 13/11/2009 16:45

And the need for chocolate has little to do with willpower. I have smoked one cigarette in my whole life; I go from one year to the next without touching alcohol. I've never taken drugs.

But a box of chocolates in my fridge is a whole different matter!

LynetteScavo · 13/11/2009 16:46

Was she babysitting late? If so YABU, because I scoff loads of chocolate if I'm baby sitting, just to help me stay awake.

The last time I baby sat for my firend, I ate about 6 penguins and a bar of fruit and nut from her fridge.

Maria2007loveshersleep · 13/11/2009 16:48

LynetteScavo: what a bizarre, bizarre & unnecessary comment 'nannies are (90% of the time) fatter than their employers'. Do tell, where on earth are you getting your facts?! And yes, completely irrelevant to the OP you're right (plus completely irrelevant to anything really as it's clearly your own weird prejudices talking)

rookiemater · 13/11/2009 16:49

Lynette that really takes the or 6 ( am loving using the biscuit smiley inappropriately)

KurriKurri · 13/11/2009 16:51

If you've had them for two weeks, your DH has eaten two, and you've eaten none, she probably assumed you didn't like them. I expect she thought she was doing you a favour.