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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that it is cruel not to allow your children to go trick or treating?

272 replies

treatortrick · 31/10/2009 16:34

And mean not to open the door to trick or treaters?

Friend has told her children that they cannot go trick or treating as it is begging.

She has also said she will not be opening the door to anyone who comes calling.

Her children are missing out and IMO this is cruel.

OP posts:
ilovesprouts · 31/10/2009 19:17

ive had lots of tts tonight ,the little ones said thank you ,happy halloween bless em its the big kids i wont give to

VampireSoupAndPeachyPie · 31/10/2009 19:17

FB we did too, and as soon as it passed wemoved on to carolling.

octopusinabox · 31/10/2009 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WartoScreamo · 31/10/2009 19:21

No trick or treating here thank god. They have s fair in the next town so we've been tonight. Someone has organised a scary walk in the woods so everone turned up on costumes with lanterns . Looks much more fun.

famishedass · 31/10/2009 19:21

i just had the prettiest 3 year old little witch knock on my door with her mum and dad, trick or treating.

Now, they must live in the same street but I've never met them before but NOW I KNOW THEM and guess what, their not strangers anymore.

lovechoc · 31/10/2009 19:21

i would rather have the penny, rather than the sweet. saves on tooth decay, it's bloody expensive getting cavities filled these days

Dumbledoresgirl · 31/10/2009 19:24

Letthereberock: yes Scotland is part of the UK still, but I don't live in Scotland! Or Ireland.

I don't begrudge others doing whatever they are doing but I deeply resent having "traditions" pushed on to me that are not traditional to where I live and who I am. I don't like the concept of trick or treat - it does sound like "Give us some sweets or else..." which is not something I would want to encourage in children (or adults).

Those people who say their children tell jokes for tricks or simply say happy halloween etc - yes that is fine, but what about teenagers and pre-teens roaming around without parental supervision? Let's face it, they are the ones who give the concept a bad name.

Oh and btw, I am not a complete killjoy. Ds2 and ds3 spent the afternoon carving a pumpkin which is now lighting up our sitting room, and making and decorating bat shaped biscuits. So we are celebrating Hallowe'en in our own way.

lovechoc · 31/10/2009 19:24

It's not known as trick or treating where I live - we call it guising. Same thing I suppose. Lights still out...may have to get the wee torch out to read my book tonight...

MamaGoblin · 31/10/2009 19:24

It's just a bit of fun...

It's NOT begging if the ToTers only go to the houses with pumpkins displayed - they'll have bought in some sweets or whatever and be expecting it! ffs...

I always wanted to do this when I was a child, because I read a lot of American children's books. I'm perfectly happy to indulge ToTers these days (as long as they're not surly teens who haven't made an effort) - what's wrong with being friendly to local children?

Divatheshopaholic · 31/10/2009 19:26

one of the guy up our road was wearing proper dracula costume with combed back hair and teeth, little kids run back
my next door was all dead pirates. its been fun night, dd 4 yr old did her first trick or treat and was so excited.

LetThereBeRock · 31/10/2009 19:26

I was speaking of Lovechoc who said it isn't a U.K tradition.

I personally have never felt intimidated, or had a trick played on me or had eggs thrown at our home.

I can understand disliking it if that has what has happened to you in the past but some posters seem to think that it's part and parcel of Halloween everywhere when that isn't the case.

MuttOfTheBaskervilles · 31/10/2009 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alwayslookingforanswers · 31/10/2009 19:27
lovechoc · 31/10/2009 19:27

Mutt I am a miserable sod too, so you're not alone. We can join the miserable sod appreciation society LOL

LetThereBeRock · 31/10/2009 19:28

The you being a general you.

I've always known it as trick or treating but I know it is often known as guising.
Really I fail to see the difference other than that with guising that it involves a song and dance routine that I'd rather not have to watch.

Dumbledoresgirl · 31/10/2009 19:31

Oh sorry Letthereberock - I thought your comment was directed at me.

I think Fannybanjo explains indirectly why I against trick or treating. She said she did it in her childhood. Well, when I was a child I knew nothing about T and Ting and knew no-one who knew differently. The first I knew of it was when I saw ET when I already an adult.

LetThereBeRock · 31/10/2009 19:31

I really don't get the religious objections,particuarly when people complain of it being a pagan tradition, so that's no Christmas or Easter too then?
But so long as people don't try to prevent others from enjoying it I don't care if they do or don't celebrate it.

Divatheshopaholic · 31/10/2009 19:32

thanks it was the highest of my social life
im glad there is miserable sods society

alwayslookingforanswers · 31/10/2009 19:32

like I said I don't have the energy to argue about it.

I don't "celebrate" Halloween -

I do celebrate the birth of Jesus and his death (Christmas and Easter).

LilyBolero · 31/10/2009 19:34

The tradition started by people asking for 'soul cakes'. The idea being that the number of cakes they received would be the number of souls of people who had died that they would pray for when they got home.

Hope you're all partaking of the WHOLE tradition.

LetThereBeRock · 31/10/2009 19:34

I'm not looking for an argument. I was going to post that anyway as I'd covered the other type of objectors those who don't like the idea of 'begging'.

It's been discussed to death on plenty of other threads anyway.

Grendle · 31/10/2009 19:34

YABU

I am not allowing my children to knock on strangers doors and effectively say "give me something nice or else". It's not a nice concept, no matter how light-hearted or in fun people think it is. If you want to arrange to do it with your mates at their houses then that's fine by me.

We don't have a pumpkin out and aren't expecting friends and yet the dorrbell has gone lots tonight.

I'm not cruel. My kids are having a fab time watching SCD .

LetThereBeRock · 31/10/2009 19:35

Well I don't believe in such things as souls but I did make cakes. Muffins really. Is that good enough?

GrapefruitMoon · 31/10/2009 19:35

I've never been keen on T or Ting but the dcs were desperate to go this year - their grandmother took them out last year in Ireland. I have to say that I'm glad we went out - we live on a main road in the city centre so not many families on our street but lots of houses on the side streets had pumpkins out. As someone said earlier it's nice to get to know your neighbours! We only called to people we knew or who had pumpkins out - went to about 10 houses in total which was more than I had planned. I did see one group calling to all the houses on our street which I thought was not on.
I wouldn't bother people who didn't want to be disturbed.

pointyhat · 31/10/2009 19:36

Guising is not the same thing. I have a group of 13 year olds in the living room practising a song together, dressed up and looking fabulous, and soon they'll go guising. I've had a couple of fantastic guisers at my door so far. It's ace