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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To refuse to eat the chicken MIL cooked for us?

116 replies

fedupintheoffice · 26/10/2009 14:18

DH, myself and our DC went to MIL and FIL's yesterday, as we do every week, only this time they offered last week to cook a Sunday dinner which we very gratefully accepted. Until a few months ago I was completely vegetarian for all of my lifehood, until I decided that I would like to eat meat, but strictly only free-range. As I have been with DH for over 20 years, PIL know all these. Even so, I asked DH to remind them last week when they phoned to invite us round, even offered to buy the meat ourselves as I am very aware how much more expensive free-range and organic can be.

So we went yesterday, meal was served, looked very yummy, I was tucking into my mash and veg, when MIL pipes up..."I already had the chicken in the freezer, it's not that fancy stuff you asked for, but it's all the same, isn't it?"...well I politely refused to eat the chicken, MIL told me I was ungrateful and when African kids are starving, I should be happy to have anything infront if me. DH stood up for me but I was really upset, although managed to stand my ground. WIBU?

P.S. I did eat the rest of the dinner, just not the meat.

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 26/10/2009 15:20

Your husband refuses to have your family to dinner and also refuses to not not buy food you feel so strongluy about.

I would be more pissed off at the husband rather than the MIL, tbh.

AbricotsSecs · 26/10/2009 15:21

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GetOrfMoiLand · 26/10/2009 15:22

Cross posts MP.

fedupintheoffice · 26/10/2009 15:22

GetOrfMoiLand, I begged and pleaded with DH to buy free range for him and the DC but there is no compromise with him and there really is no point in arguing with that man sometimes.

OP posts:
ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 26/10/2009 15:23

1- you should stay veggie for those sorts of people
2 - if necessary you should eat the non fr chicken
3 - you are a weirdo if you started eating chicken after a lifetime of being veggie!

cupcake123 · 26/10/2009 15:24

Hoochie, troll was my first thought too, but everyone else was taking it seriously so I thought again. Perhaps I should trust my trollery instincts - they have been honed over years of wasting endless hours on message boards, so I should have a little more faith!

Alibooobaandthe40phantoms · 26/10/2009 15:26

OP - why don't you take over the shopping and cooking then if you feel that strongly? I don't understand why it is a compromise for him, you are asking him to raise rather than lower his ethical standards.

fedupintheoffice · 26/10/2009 15:27

Thanks for all your replies but GTG, LO are mithering to go out.

OP posts:
AbricotsSecs · 26/10/2009 15:30

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PoisonToadstool · 26/10/2009 15:32

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Alibooobaandthe40phantoms · 26/10/2009 15:33

Hmm - hoochiemomma I think you are right.

fedupintheoffice · 26/10/2009 15:33

...to KFC

OP posts:
salbysea · 26/10/2009 15:34

I think it can be hard for some older people to understand. Meat is a luxury we should be grateful for. To some of them the difference between FR and non FR is that one of them is perceived as posher than the other

it was already dead and on your plate, if you don't like non FR for purely ethical reasons then it makes no sense to refuse to eat it in this case as what is the outcome of you eating or not eating it? its already been raised how it was raised and killed and cooked and served to you? Sorry I dont get your point on that one!

(I get FR BTW, but choosing FR over non FR in a supermarket isle for ethical reasons makes sense - it has an impact on the lives of chickens! your actions at your MILs has no impact whatsoever on the FR/nonFR situation)

alwayslookingforanswers · 26/10/2009 15:35

hmmm

so you don't know anyone that lives near you, your nearest family is 1 1/2hrs away, you're single and haven't had a partner for ages, but you have a DP that works, abroad, but then you're going to marry your long term partner, now you're married to him, and perhaps your DH/DP? doesn't want to buy the FR meat because of money being tight???

whistles

perhaps this is why your DH doesn't want to buy FR - the cost? if things are so tight

hmm

erm ok

cupcake123 · 26/10/2009 15:36

LOL @ ...to KFC

AbricotsSecs · 26/10/2009 15:38

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AliGrylls · 26/10/2009 15:42

I can't believe that some of you would even think it was only a bit rude. If someone invites you over to dinner you have to accept it is not your choice and eat it - particularly if the only reason you don't eat something is on a matter of principle. It is not for you to impose your principles on other people.

Think of it this way, how would you feel if a meat eater said to you - I don't eat vegetarian so could you make me a meat dish. You would hate it.

fedupintheoffice · 26/10/2009 15:43

I wanted to be a funny troll. Guess it didn't work out too well huh? Never mind, KFC is all I have!

OP posts:
PoisonToadstool · 26/10/2009 15:44

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GetOrfMoiLand · 26/10/2009 15:45

Oh for FUCK sake

Why oh why? This had bloody Lola written all over it, all those posters who sang lola the showgirl were right.

ALFA is Miss Marple of MN

cupcake123 · 26/10/2009 15:46

I thought it was funny, for what it's worth!

GetOrfMoiLand · 26/10/2009 15:46

Fed up, for example, is a twat.

What a WASTE of fucking time. Piss off, you loon.

alwayslookingforanswers · 26/10/2009 15:48

there's a few more - but I was getting confused about being single for 2yrs and then having a LDP and then getting married and being with someone for 20yrs

pleasechange · 26/10/2009 15:51

I think IP and Heated make good points

She did put you in a bit of a difficult position to say she'd cater for you and then announce it was'nt FR when you all sat down to eat

I know a lot of people see this as fussiness, but really no different to being veggie/only eating halal etc. It's the OP's personal choice and beliefs.

Personally I probably would have eaten it reluctantly, but then asked for veggie food/bring my own food in future

Sparkletastic · 26/10/2009 15:51

I far prefer the more imaginative trolls - polys, tarzan sex etc. Sunday lunch etiquette is somewhat prosaic....