To not want cut our hedge down?

[worldgonemad72]

Hi All

We own our own home, its semi detached, there is a large hedge (about 9ft high) seperating the 2 back gardens, which was there when we moved in.
In the summer our neighbour asked us to cut it down as she doesn't like it (her dad and the man who lived here when the houses were first built planted it around 30 years ago), we did consider it but tbh i like it, our garden feels really private and it stops her lad kicking the ball over every 5 minutes.
Anyway we refused, although we do cut her side when it needs a trim.
Am i in the wrong for not cutting it down? she refuses to speak to us now.
Honest answers please as i dont think i am but you never know and id like someones elses viewpoint.
Many Thanks

Yes and no. You aren't comprimising at all. Would it be possible to trim some of it down? Half the size say?

I get why you dont wanna cut it down but to refuse point blanc?! I mean your hedge affects them equally. It's not really fair. To stop talking to you all together is a bit OTT.

I think you should compromise by offering to take say the top 18 inches off. This would maintain your privacy and maybe give them a bit more light in their garden and more importantly perhaps restore relations between you. Don't forget if you move you have to declare any areas of conflict with neighbours so it's worth trying to keep it pleasant. It IS your hedge but I think you could give a little ground without losing out too much.

I agree, lop 2ft off will seem like a large step to meeting her half way, and unless the neighbours are giants, they still wont be able to look over.

that seems fair enough i suppose, although she is a funny bint in general, i think she had the same issue with the girl we bought the house off from what other neighbours have said.

I think the hedge law is really unfair. It's illegal to put a fence up higher than 6ft but you can let your hedge grow to 20 ft.

I can't see how, if you took it down by a couple of foot as others suggest, it would impact on your privacy. And it would still stop the ball coming over. If you're planning on living there for a while, I'd try to compromise - it's horrible having bad feeling with neighbours.

what does she want to have instead of the hedge?

Whos garden is the hedge planted in ?

She wants us to put up a fence instead, she wont contribute to the cost though as she said its our hedge so it should be our cost to replace it, i think thats what got my back up tbh, plus she kept sending her partner round to badger me about it when dh was at work. Dh went round after the 3rd time to say that we weren't cutting the hedge down, but we were happy to maintain it on both sides.

BTW its on our side of the boundary, she planted fir trees on her side and were about the same height as the hedge but she cut them down about 2 years ago.

she's being unpleasant sending dh round to keep badgering you to cut the hedge down when she wants you to put up a fence at your own expense instead.

Maybe she can't be bothered trimming the hedge and doesn't like the idea of your dh going on their property to do it either. No idea.

I, like you, would like to keep my garden private as much as possible.

It's a bit tricky, isn't it, if she has her bck up already. Is it because her garden is in the shade a lot due to the hedge? If so, the fence would have a similar effect really, wouldn't it as your hedge trimmed down a bit?

Nah, she can't insist you put a fence up and it's not on to send her DH round. Why don't you and your DH go round together and say you'll cut it down by a couple of foot as a compromise? Then her DH will have to stop coming round

what so she wants you to chop your hedge down to please her and expects you to pay for it too ?

YANBU.

Tell her to Bog off.

tell her, weather permitting, you always sunbathe naked.

If she wants the hedge down, she can put up a fence on her own property at her own expense surely, why is it solely your problem?

Her garden is north facing like mine, so nobody gets any sun in the back garden from about 1 o clock in the summer,i just think she likes to be nosy, the hedge ends about 10ft from the house and there is a wall built (about 4FT high) she used to have a high fence up on her side but took it down so she can now see into our conservatory, Dont think she'll be too happy when my dh puts up some bamboo screening where the wall is on half term

Does your hedge affect their sunshine? Our neighbours have a horrid Leylandi hedge on the SW side of our garden and it is over 11ft tall.
In the summer it's not too bad as it does give shade, but nothing really grows next to it.
I would like them to cut it down to at least 8ft high, but they claim it would look awfull.
But I'm not going to get into a dispute about it.

Cut it to 6 foot. that still gives you privacy but will let in more light.

Your neighbours would probably expect you to pay for any replacement fencing as that boundary is probably your responsibility, whereas the other side of their garden adjoining their next neighbour is in the same respect their responsibility. IMHO, 9ft is excessive, and it's only going to get bigger. What kind of hedge is it? It may be something that you can hack back and it will grow on healthily, but some need completely stripping out if they get beyond useful size as cutting back will stunt/kill the plant.
We've never had any dispute like this, so have no axe to grind, I promise you.
When we moved into our current house (semi) we had a similar hedge along the boundary, and we cut it out straight away for the main reason that it was 3-4ft wide so made the garden look really small - was amazing how much bigger it looked when the hedge came out. There was also a eucalyptus tree that was at first interesting and a nice size but would have reached 30ft, so that came out too - it would have blocked out everyone's light.
Hedges can be replaced by good fencing - can you add height to the 6ft rule by adding trellis?? And some gorgeous climbers?
TBH, your neighbours may think you're being unreasonable/unfriendly to not contemplate some sort of compromise over an issue they see as pretty important, so kind of expected they don't want to be pally with you - probably think that's the last thing you'd want.

I assume you are neighbours side by side, since you mention both having north-facing gardens, and this is along a side of the garden adjoining their garden.

While 9 feet does seem a bit high, I think YANBU considering the request is not only to remove it, but replace it at your own cost.

I'd suggest taking 2 feet off at most, and if her DH comes again, tell him to suggest that they can put their own fence up so your hedge cannot be seen from their side, since you will not cut any more off, and (FX under your breath "they have a nerve to be expecting you to fund a replacement fence, when") the hedge is perfectly good as a boundary, block to any balls going over, and affords you your privacy, and not just that, you like your hedge!!

When I lived in another part of town, the people on the main road (in houses there before the field had the small estate built on it) had a 20' high hedge at the back.

Some years later, instead of it being only visible at gutter level between my home and my immediate neighbours' home, it could be seen 5' above the rooftops - ie some 30'

We each gave the family 50 quid towards the cost of getting it partly cut. That was done (no forewarning, and the cutters parked in front of my house - OK, no easy place on the main road - and dragged everything down the side of my house leaving back garden covered in cuttings - not so happy at that).

It was a compromise, and to be honest I would not have been bothered, but my neighbours were to the north and with 2 small girls, wanted sunshine and air in their back garden (Tracy enjoyed growing herbs etc too), and it was completely overshadowed by that massive hedge - only went half-way along my back garden, fortunately!