to think women who use their husband's email address are submissive stepford wives who don't have a life of their own?

[Picante]

Seriously, is it that hard to work out how to get your own email address?

The ones that share are bad enough e.g. '[email protected]' or whatever, but I've seen quite a few that simply have the man's name as the email address.

Yes I know there are more important things to worry about, but come on ladies, this is 2009!

well with

a) you could argue that a letter can be taken out of the envelope and put back in.....

and with some of the seals on most of the letters we get these days wouldn't be too hard to do that with a still unopened letter.

And I have to ask again - when someone gives you your email address - do you actually ask them who else has access to it or whether they share it with anyone???

I open DH's snail mail as well when I feel like it.

We are just very boring, there is never anything good.

gah - when someone gives you their email address

I totally agree. I am sending out some info for the school this evening and I have a list of email addresses in front of me. I nearly gag when I see [email protected]

it is ludicrous. an email address is free.

bizarre. I really can't quite believe it. There were about 4 out of 25 with shared email addresses.

well if you know how to set up extra email addresses on your ISP account then that's fine. Then again you've still got the problem that you can have only one account holder for most ISP's - meaning that person could still find out your password and access it.

Personally having had several different web based email accounts hacked into I don't touch them with a barge pole. Which does leave the options limited (although of course most ISP's you can access your emails online as well)

I think some of you forget that a LOT of people don't spend 3/4 of their time online, not everyone has multiple computers or the knowledge of how to set up separate log-ins on one computer (again that has the issue that you still have an administrator who can go and change the password and get onto your account).

Really life is too short to be fussing about wether someone "might" read their emails if it's coming into the same place as yours.

Just because your friend's DH knows something you've written in an email to your friend doens't mean he's read it........perhaps she's told him.

Haven't read the whole thread, but it seems to me that the OP makes huge assupmtions about things she knows nothing about - you have no idea who is reading anyone's email regardless of the address you're sending it to, do you? Just because the address says [email protected] doesn't mean that Mr Picante isn't reading them.

FWIW, we have an account in my name (the reasons for it being in my name are lost in the mists of time. As it happens it was DP who set it up, iirc), and DP uses that, too, probably more than I do. But it's crap (technologically) so we both have our own gmail accounts too. But since I can't be arsed to log in every time and am liable to forget the password (doubtless that'll be my Stepford gene )I have it set to remember the password, as does DP with his. It means if either of us is away, we can check each other's messages if we need to. But, since we respect each other's privacy, we don't make a habit of going into each other's accounts.

All of which to say, YABU.

nearly as bad as buying your dp pants.yes hate that coupley homogeneity,the joint answer-phone "hi this is doris and boris we are not at home please leave us a message" and joint email addresses ^CoupleySchmuckley^@hotmail.com

ha ha ha at [email protected]

V.v.good!

alwayslooking - I would always assume that somebody's email was private, unless it was of the dorisandfred variety. However, when friends' partners consistently comment on things that I have written in emails, then it quickly becomes clear.

It's true that the friend could have told her DH - but tbh if a friend was telling her DH private things that I had written in an email, and he was insensitive enough to bring them up in front of me, I'd definitely avoid confiding in future!

Interesting thread - people clearly have very different ideas about how to use email. I hadn't really realised that before.

anybody can set up a gmail account in about 3 minutes.

I'd also think huh? at a man giving out [email protected] as his email addrss.

Just completely yanbu for even thinking it and bothering to start a thread.

Why would you be judgmental about people's email addresses. Why would you bother?

"I nearly gag when I see [email protected]"

Ffs, that really annoys me, why the hell does it make you feel physically sick that some couples have a shared e-mail!?

My husband and I definitely have separate e mail addresses, although we do know each others passwords. We do use our e mail accounts a lot though, partly for work related things too.
I have to admit that I find shared e mail addresses strange. If I were to send an e mail to a female friend, I wouldn't particularly want their husband to read it- not because it would contain anything offensive to him but because it would be for the friend.
I think it is different in situations where one or both partners don't really use e mail at all but otherwise, I find it odd.

"alwayslooking - I would always assume that somebody's email was private, unless it was of the dorisandfred variety."

rather a dangerous assumption don't you think? The only people I know who don't share their email address (or at least their inbox) with someone else are you lot on here .

And they all have a variety of email address, their name, their DH's, names, combinatioin of both, totally made up etc etc

yes wet boak at any couple sharing email address. it is evocative of losing one's identity and becoming a homogenous mass.two previously separate individuals co-joined in a barftastic manner.not individual names or accounts anymore

bolleaux sm

Scottish - is this something else I've missed........buying your DH pants...........is that some sort of social faxu pas as well??

always looking - yes, you are right, v. dangerous assumption! This thread has opened my eyes.

(Although I suspect I could mentally divide my friends into Might Share An Email Address and Password Protected Til I Die lists....)

oh my god the rage over half a pair of a gnat's testicles

you all need rescue remedy

It's true I can't be sure if my emails get read by someone else even if I send them to a friend's own email address. But at least they're giving out the general impression that they are an individual and manage their own communications. I mean I can't stop a nosy partner opening their postal mail from me either, but I'd still send a card or letter to just them if it was for just them.

apparently soem women in MN buy their dp pants.infantalising him. a grown man who works,gets on/off buses on his own needs the missus to buy his chuddies

buy your children under wear- yes
your adult partner- wrong

Rescue Remedy?This will turn into another homeopathy debate now.

er

stinky smoker

lol wombat.. yes you can all get cross about that but email addresses is a most drippy thing to get cross about

having an opinion about people buying underpants is