to interfere and ring this mum's HV?

[smokinaces]

Was in supermarket this morning. Took the boys on the 50p ride ons, and as we were finishing another boy came over with his mum telling him he couldnt go on.

We were trying to get the kids in the trolley, as she was trying to get her son to come with her. The ride ons are in a lobby bit at the back of the shop, leading onto the pedestrain access.

Anyway, she stormed off, shouting at her son that if he didnt come now, he could stay there on his own. Fair enough, I have done that a few times myself.

We followed her round, thinking she'd be waiting for him to chase after her, round at the newspaper bit (round a bend, my kids get freaked by the time I get there and catch me up)

But she didnt stop.

She stormed through the supermarket, to the other entrance/exit. She left the shop and stormed off to the other end of the car park to her car. Without really a backward glance.

I didnt see anyone else with her or the son - when we left him he was most definately on his own on the rides, and didnt see another adult (though they could have been at the cigarette counter)

He definately didnt follow us out of the shop.

Now, I know of this mum through a friend of a friend, so know she's a single mum and had a real hard time of it - but I cant stop thinking I need to do something. I wish I had gone back into the shop to make sure he was ok and she came back. I wish I had stopped her and asked if she was ok.

I know who her health visitor is - and know them quite well. Do you think its interfering too much to ring them? I just think she might need help - we've all threatened to leave our kids, but she went too far IMO.

so AIBU to ring her health visitor and mention this?

And you refer to someone smacking their children in public, and wishing you had done more. What do you mean ? It is not illegal to smack your child. You do know that don't you ?

Take it from someone who knows. As another poster said. Refering to HV, who might very well refer to social services, is not helpful or supportive to the mum in question.

Trust me. I KNOW.

Was totally not expecting this to still be at the top of the threads!

I have made moves to contact the mum, and will see what happens from then. I have decided after sleeping on it that I will not contact the HV or anyone else.

The way she acted (i.e. not looking back) does make me think she had someone else with her I just didnt see. I had someone with me, but was dealing with my other son - when I mentioned it today to them, saying I wished I'd done more they said they thought they saw someone else with the child (they couldnt really remember the incident as it didnt stick in their mind IYSWIM, but remember a mum storming off and leaving boy, but someone else round the corner waiting for him)

Goes to show what you see from one angle is not what actually happens, and me sticking my nose in whatever way wouldnt have helped. I will still see if she gets in touch with me and offer a coffee when I see her.

I really thought it was a strange and almost unbelievable situation, which is why its prayed on my mind. But talking to the other person today seems I didnt catch the whole story evidently.

Next time anything like this happens though, I know I will stick around until I know the full facts - a simple case of asking the boy if he was ok and had someone with him would have done it wouldnt it?

I hope that is what happened smokin. Sorry if I came on too strong earlier. I know you were beating yourself up about it

OP has proved my point. Turns out she didn't know the full story.
I agree with the poster who said that society, or labour government or whatever/whoever, has made us over-zealous at sticking our nose in where it is just not needed or wanted.
And what a total over reaction to refer to the baby P case, by one poster.
You guys have no idea how damaging it is and how it is impossible to remove things like this from your medical records once someone reports you.
Bet none of you thought about it from that perspective, did you ?
maybe you should.