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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think retailers have no right to dictate

20 replies

Glitterknickaz · 05/10/2009 20:30

which of their products are purchased by pregnant women?

When I was pg I was on my way round to a friend's house and they asked me to pick up a packet of cigarettes. Now, I wasn't refused service but the lady serving me gave me a withering look of disgust and told me exactly what she thought of smoking in pregnancy. I'd given up quite some time previously....

I also was going round to my parents' house for dinner and decided to get mum a bottle of her favourite wine as a gift. This was also commented on by the person serving me (different shop).

I was reading the BBC News website and came across this which reminded me of these two incidents.

So, AIBU to think that what you buy whilst pregnant is your own business and the retailer should butt out?

OP posts:
slowreadingprogress · 05/10/2009 20:42

YANBU. No business of theirs to comment. Unless you were rollicking drunk in the aisles and smoking a camberwell carrot in the shop, they should serve you without comment.

SixtyFootDoll · 05/10/2009 20:45

yanBU But when we have a govt who tell us how to live our lives then shit rolls downhill

TrillianSlasher · 05/10/2009 20:46

Actually retailers can choose to serve you or not just because they feel like it. Offering things for sale does not oblige them to accept your money.

But it is silly of them to judge when they don't know it's for you.

nickytwotimes · 05/10/2009 20:52

But they aren't dictating, Glitter.
They sold you the items.
None of their business tbh but, hey, people make assumptions and judge. You should know that, being a mner.

ThingumyandBob · 05/10/2009 20:54

It?s as stupid as being refused alcohol because you have your teenage daughter with you?www.cravenherald.co.uk/news/4481530.__You_can___t_buy_beer_in_case_it___s_for_your_daughter/ I agree SFDoll the shit is indeed rolling downhill?.

MorrisZapp · 05/10/2009 22:45

Retailers have no more or less right than anybody else to dictate or comment on what you buy.

It was just a comment, they didn't try to dictate anything, though as somebody else said, they aren't obliged to sell you anything.

TheFallenMadonna · 05/10/2009 22:52

They allowed you to buy what you wanted and used the privilege of free speech to tell you what they thought.

Sounds very democratic actually...

MillyMollyMoo · 06/10/2009 08:41

Shop online it's much better for the blood pressure.

Disembodied3 · 06/10/2009 08:50

God, this is like what happened to my mum the other say,

My 21 year old sister tries to buy beer for her engagement party in tescos, she has no ID so they wont let her buy it (she looks well over 18 but not over 25 ... why shopuld she - shes 21 and you have to be 18 to buy beer NOT 25!!)

So she gives the beer to my mum who tries to pay for it, they refuse to let her as they say shes buying it for her daughter, my mums says well shes 21 - she can drink!'

They still refuse,

my mum goes to 3 different tilla nd they FOLLOW her and tell the cashiers not to serve her.

She goes out of the shop - come back in and picks up a different crate goes to a different till and the manager follows her and tells the cashier not to serve her,

my mum argues sjhes been out of the shop, has noone with her - she is 43 and buying some beer.

They wont let her!

By this time there are 3 managers / staff with her!

Customers were saying its ridiculous etc and they would not budge!

So what if she came back an hour later, 2 hours to buy it, the next day?

Is a 43 year old woman not allowed to buy beer because she ha a dauhter under 25 now ???

kreecherlivesupstairs · 06/10/2009 10:01

So glad I live in Switzerland and can get dd to nip to the shops for my fags and beer

boundarybabe · 06/10/2009 10:11

I got id'd buying a bottle of whiskey at Christmas for a friend's present - I was 7 months pg at the time (and presumably looked like a teenager). God knows what that must've looked like.

differentWitch · 06/10/2009 10:25

The thing that makes me laugh is that it is not illegal for a parent to give alcohol to a child over 5 years old in their own home.

sockmonkey · 06/10/2009 10:41

A till operator was explaining the alcohol thing to me. She thinks it's a pain too, but said she would have an £80 fine taken out of her wages for selling alcohol without seeing ID. The supermarket also gets a fine. I think it's also a 3 strikes & you're out situation.

She can't afford to lose that kind of money, so does not take any risks.

AnnVan · 06/10/2009 11:18

Well I generally get ID'd when I try and buy alcohol anyway. Apparently I look about 19 (I'm nearly 28) I think it is silly for people to judge like that though. Being pg gave me a great out once though. A couple of kids walking behind me asked me to pop in the shop and buy them some fags. I turned round, showing my house sized belly, and said I'd look bad buying cigarettes (I never buy fags or alcohol for minors)
There was a news story a while back about supermarkets refusing to sell if you had children with you (even if the child was a baby ) DP and I plan to let DS have a taste of wine with his dinner when he's older, as a way of encouraging a responsible attitude to drink. Making it a complete taboo (and making this much fuss about it) only encourages kids to want to try it.

Original poster
Glitterknickaz · 07/10/2009 09:59

sorry.... meant to come back to this

my bits in a way were to illustrate the scenario, it's the link that I find much more interesting

a retailer that refused to sell cheese until the woman promised she wouldn't eat it herself!

OP posts:
NorbertDentressangle · 07/10/2009 10:04

There was a case in our local paper where a 21 yr old young woman wasn't allowed to buy teaspoons from Tesco as she didn't have any ID on her.

Now that is taking it to extremes!

Squishabelle · 07/10/2009 10:15

The answer is - dont buy fags and beer in the supermarket. Get them at small corner shops - they will sell anything to anyone - at least they do in my neck of the woods.

funkybuddah · 07/10/2009 10:24

Retailers can do whatever they want (while i thin YANBU about being lectured)

shops and alot of shopping centres are private property and you are invited as a guest into them, we can refuse service ..

LadyMuck · 07/10/2009 10:26

For anyone who missed this link the first time

MorrisZapp · 07/10/2009 16:37

Totally agree with funkybuddah. Shops are private. If you want to leave at any time you can - they have no obligation to sell anything to anybody.

They also have no obligation to let you use their staff toilets, but that's another discussion.

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