to think boys have become the less trendy, or wanted, or something-or-other gender these days....

[agingoth]

I will declare an interest from the start as I have two boys.

I am noticing so much anti-boy stuff both out there (in media etc- stories about underachieving boys) and in day to day talk and chat.

All the threads on here about being disappointed at a scan seem to be about getting 'another boy'. Excuse me for generalising if I am wrong but they do seem more prevalent.

From other mums etc I constantly hear 'oh girls are so much easier/cleverer/more sensible' etc...

The worst was, when expecting ds2, to be COMMISERATED WITH by people saying 'oh you must have REALLY WANTED another girl'...er, no, I wanted another little person actually....

Am I reasonable to be seeing this trend everywhere now? and if so what do we think it means for future male generations?

The less wanted sex (in this country anyway), the 'stupid' sex, the unpretty sex you can't put in 'lovely dresses'....how is this going to pan out for them, poor things?

All I wanted was 2 healthy & happy babies that would grow into healthy & happy children and I give thanks everyday that that is what I have.

However these are some of the comments I have had since having DS2 4 months ago....

"you must be gutted you didnt have a girl"

"when are you going to try for a girl"

"i suppose you are going to have another one now - what if it's another boy?"

"i didnt bother buying DS2 a present as there is no point buying boys clothes" still miffed about that one (from very girly & pink SIL) do boys not wear clothes too???

I think though that it is more about "having one of each" than them both being boys.

I am so glad that they are the same sex though as they will have alot more in common (hopefully- as only 20months between them) and get on much better than i ever did with my brother!

I'm pretty sure I've said this before on MN, but when I expected my third I was asked more than a few times "oh, is this a little surprise baby? I wouldn't think you'd want any more, you already have one of each"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also, from my experience with my own children and the 114 children I have worked with over the years, Boys might be louder, but their quite placid compared to girls.

Girls are much MUCH more challenging as they have their minds set on their preferences from a very young age...

And I didn't mean to sound so matter-of-factly, just my thoughts

?and I was feeling guilty for letting out a cheer when we saw a little wily on the 5 month scan picture! We would have been utterly happy with boy or girl, but as we have a girl already and OH would really like another male in the house we were over the moon to be having a boy!

I hadn?t noticed that people want girls TBH?most of my friends with children have boys, of those that have both they reckon that boys are ?easier?. I?ve also got 3 friends who are having or had trouble getting pregnant so complaining about the sex wouldn?t entre my head.

I think there is something of an issue with behavioural expectations for boys commonly being lower than for girls. Plus there is a problem with the media-reflected perception that men are simply boys that have got taller. Not to mention the view that is widespread in some areas that men who are actively involved in childcare are somehow less manly.

On the other hand, overall it's still a largely patriarchal society that is, in most areas, governed and managed by men.

It's prejudice and sexism either way but I don't see that they cancel out; I see it more as sexism in either direction is unnecessary and unhelpful.

my eldest DD was a delight and still is shes 18 and my best friend but youngest 13 is just a little brat who thinks the world owes her a living my son who is autistic is a lot easier to live with than her.

on another forum i visit there does seem to be a very strong feeling that girls are better. peopel passing on sympathies when people announce they are expecting boys and congratulations for those expecting girls.
i have 2 of 'each' now and have to say so far my boys have been much easier and more loving than dd1 dd2 is only a few weeks old so can;t answer for her yet.
dd1's tantrums are spectacualr and even though shes never been treated any different to the boys has a real 'princess' attitude.
i think its really sad to want one sex of child that you are disapointed when you have the other. i just feel greatful to have my 4 regardless of their gender and am thankful for them especially when i see friends struggling through procedures l=such as ivf just to get any 'gender'

I think people just flap their jaws for something to say mostly.

I have a DS, only ever wanted a boy, mainly cos I always wished to have a brother. I was sure he was a boy from the moment i knew i was pg.

I know it must be lovely to dress up a little girl, but the idea of the cost of it all... I remember my sister was a shocker for clothes, hair bobbles, and bits and pieces. Still is, nasty shoe and bag habit.. well, until recently..

She just had a DD, so i have a little princess to spoil, but when I can afford it!

I think a reply of, 'I'm happy and that's all that matters and if anyone says 'Shame' well then it really IS none of their business.' They are just wasting breath.

Boys are not any less trendy, wanted etc. Sure they are different to girls to raise, but swings and roundabouts, what's easier with one, is more difficult with the other?

Oh, but I totally disagree with the T-shirts, especially from baby sizes that say Monster, Trouble etc.... that to me is labelling. Call them that, and the expectation isn't set very high for him is it?

I've had a cheeky monkey t-shirt, but that's cos DH has his best toy monkey that travels with him when we fly anywhere etc. Cheeky Monkey is also a totally different kettle of fish to trouble and monster...

I took back a pack of blooming t-shirts that had it printed on the back of one of them, as i hadn't realised when I bought them.

Had DC2 in August by planned CS - a second beautiful DS. When in recovery the couple who were after us in theatre came into recovery too. The midwife who was looking after me asked them what they'd had - they'd had DD2. Now I know she was only joking but what she did seems so inappropriate to me - she pretended to swap the babies over so we'd have one of each!
That still bothers me a bit for some reason although I know she probably didn't mean anything by it. For the record she has one of each and I think that is what most people assume to be a perfect family and is the root of most silly comments.