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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to get a twitchy eye when women refer to their husbands/fathers of their children as 'Daddy'.

48 replies

pootle09 · 28/09/2009 20:55

He's not your daddy. He's your husband/partner/father of your kids. Call him by his name when you are speaking about him to me. Purlease.

OP posts:
SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:01

i call my DH "daddy". I don't want the kids to call him ny his first name. I wouldn't want them to call me by my first name either - I like them to call me mummy so DH calls me mummy.

The thing that is embarassing is that due to thsi I have accidentally referred to my own dad as "daddy" a couple of times recently

But then when DD1 was first born he accidentally said "well I am her father" - yikes! So I guess we are even

IDriveaRedCar · 28/09/2009 21:03

Oh my word I hate it too. My MIL does it referring to her husband (my FIL) even though her sons are in their 30's and haven't called him Daddy since they were 4. And she calls him this even when its just the two of them - aarrggghh!!
I find it really creepy.

paisleyleaf · 28/09/2009 21:08

I've never heard anyone actually do this
but yanbu it's ewwy
It can't be that good for your relationship either can it?

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:09

You have never heard a woman say "daddy please can you pass DD her milk" or something?

Do all of your kids use your first names?

Although yes when I was at school a lot of children called their parents by their first names so maybe we are weird!

Original poster
pootle09 · 28/09/2009 21:12

I can understand calling him 'Daddy' when speaking in front of the kids (such as: Go and take it to Daddy, DS) but there's no need whatsoever to call him Daddy to ME when none of the kids are even there (as in 'Oh I can't meet then as Daddy gets home at 4'). He ain't no one's daddy in that situation!

OP posts:
hatwoman · 28/09/2009 21:14

i hate it too. children are perfectly able to understand that Daddy is not Mummy's Daddy. in fact my two would laugh if I addressed him as Daddy. and would point out the ridiculousness of it. I refer to him as Daddy when talking to them but never address him as Daddy.

my dilemma is what to call him when I'm talking to the dog. but maybe that's not something most people worry about...

paisleyleaf · 28/09/2009 21:15

Sardine, I can't say I have....not when talking directly to him.
and nope, my DD calls me mummy, and DH daddy.

traceybath · 28/09/2009 21:20

Well talking to a friend I say his name.

But if asking one of the children to go and get him I would say 'go and get daddy'.

Thats normal isn't it - I mean its not like i call him daddy in bed [vomit emoticon]

crockydoodle · 28/09/2009 21:21

MIL calls her dh Daddy all the time and their kids are 40! I always think of Hyacinth Bucket. MIL resembles HB in other ways too

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:22

Oh I see

I probably do that sometimes as well. Th ekids are so small and my brain is not firing on all cylinders! I hope that doesn't make me a creepy loon Plus see hideousness of being so used to saying "mummy" and "daddy" that I have been saying it to my parents [cringe]

paisleyleaf · 28/09/2009 21:25

I'll say "go and get daddy" / "pass it to daddy" etc as it's talking about daddy.
But I wouldn't call him daddy myself, as in "daddy can you do such and such".
I think there's a difference.

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:26

Oh whoops so I am creepy and weird after all. Must admit I thought it was normal to do what traceybath and i do.

Have to say I have tried to explain to DD that her granny and grandad are my mummy and daddy etc but she hasn't got the hang of it at all. She must be a bit daft.

paisleyleaf · 28/09/2009 21:28

Sardine - perhaps she doesn't get that grandad is your daddy because you call your DH daddy.

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:28

So what I mean is if DH and I use each others names all the time when they are there I'm not sure they will realise that they have to have different names when they are talking to us IYSWIM.

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:29

I say to her "can you give that to daddy, no, dad, no I mean grandad".

No wonder she is confused the poor little devil.

megapixels · 28/09/2009 21:40

YANBU. He is daddy only to my kids so that's how I refer to him to them, never to others! Most cringeworthy was when I heard someone refer to her husband as that, when they don't even have children!

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 21:48

I have really fucked up with this one havent I.

Original poster
pootle09 · 28/09/2009 21:52

Not sure Sardine - what does your psychiatrist think?

OP posts:
fishflange · 28/09/2009 21:56

I went to a show for kids at the theatre and a bloke came into the foyer and shouted, presumably without thinking, 'Mummy!'
50 odd women turned round and went 'What?'

made me laugh

SardineQueen · 28/09/2009 22:06

St this rate it's obviously the children who will need the psychiatrist.

honie · 28/09/2009 22:07

I call DH Daddy quite a bit. Daddy is a fairly traditional name for the main male in a household in various cultures, which is why you get the 'whose the daddy' type stuff. If you listen to soul music and the likes of Nina Simone you hear examples of women refering to the man in their life in this way too. When referring to DH for the eldest I call him 'dad' - as this is what DS calls him. Littlest still calls him Daddy though.

I would never call him 'daddy' to anyone else though - thats creepy! So I dont think yabu in some ways - but only in the 'in your face' examples

CuntWhacker · 28/09/2009 22:22

oh god, pukesville.

YANBU at all!

RumourOfAHurricane · 28/09/2009 22:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CuntWhacker · 28/09/2009 22:44

I felt like a namechange Shiney - and this new name suits me down to the ground

ThatVikRinA22 · 28/09/2009 22:44

lol shiney...

my thoughts exactly! wiping up coffee as we speak...