Surely I'm not?

[SWALK]

DD (17) has recently got a new boyfriend, which is fine. However, his name is Chris, which is a name I hate, and would rather not have to say a lot, especially if he is going to come to the house all the time. I told DD last night that if she wanted to bring him round, then I would be calling him Luke, which I think is an acceptable name (and very nice - it was going to be DD's name, had she been a boy). Very unreasonably, I thought, she flew off the handle at this, even though I know that she likes the name Luke.
Now I have three options:

1. Call the boy Luke when he is at the house
2. Call him "Mr " when he is here
3. Don't let him come to the house.

He is a lovely boy, but I just can't stand him name! So, is it unreasonable?

SWALK - do you ever eat apples or crisps?

Do you have synaesthesia? That would be the only rational explanation for finding it so difficult to say a certain-sounding name.

PS We are 'a sensible bunch' - that's why we can't believe that someone would even imagine that it was okay to call someone else by a different name just because you don't like their given one! You sound like some upper-class woman who calls all her maids Mary because she they don't deserve the faff of remembering their real names!

is this a joke??

yes.

Or if it isn't, the op is a total lunatic who needs to go to the GP to get her meds upped!

As I have said before, this is not a joke.
I never 'camm all my maids Mary b ecause I can't remember their real names'. I call the cleaner Liz, because that is her name.
I don't have synaesthesia, but that doesn't stop me disliking the name. I would never have called my children that name, because it sounds like somebody biting an apple, as I said. I do eat apples, but only cut into slices. I don't eat crisps because I find the texture is too rough, and scratches my tongue.

Swalk - call him dipshit and be done with it

i think you should call him Dave, like trigger(the dope)calls rodney out of only fools and horses

I'm sorry, 'call my maids Mary because I can't remember their real names'.

weirdo

Well, if you don't have synaesthesia then you have 2 more common complaints: rudeness and humourlessness (re maids and cleaner). Just because you don't like a name doesn't give you the right to decide not to use it. If this isn't a wind-up then you are uptight to the point of needing to speak to someone. Seriously - you don't want to call someone by their name because it's the sound of biting into an apple? Does that sounds rational and normal? Or acceptable?

How do you cope with everyday life if this sort of thing bothers you? I mean that genuinely, not bitchily.

is your rl name HYACINTH BUCKET by any chance

Topher is an acceptable shortening of Christopher in America

Can't you just say 'Oooh, young man'?

Well if you ARE serious, you are quite clearly barking mad .

But the first part of Luke sounds like 'Loo'. Which means that you would think of the toilet every time you said it. Better to bite an apple than take the piss.

I used to know a Christopher whose nickname was Titfer - you could try that.

Or you could try calling him Fred.

Or if you really want to piss off your daughter, callhim by her previous boyfriend's name, and if that doesn't work, by your DP's name. That should cover it - you obviously have ishoos and this is a covert way of getting rid of the poor boy intruder into your family circle - he's probably best off out of it anyway.

I presume this is a windup but if not get over yourself and call him Chris!

ok you get to call him luke if he calls you Grimelda

I like Titfer. They could make it a little game to bond over. The OP can be Shitfer. Works best if her surname is Brains.

lol BOF!

Why not ask the young man what he would like you to call him rather than deciding on Luke? I'm sure he will be understanding (and never some around again anyway after that).

ask your dd what she calls him when he's banging her brains out

not sure that "Fuck me, big boy" is any better than Luke.

i like fuck me big boy,pass the gravy boat please