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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to let DS go to school without his glasses?

21 replies

DontWannaHaveToMoveAGAIN · 14/09/2009 16:02

He (7) forgot to put them on this morning and I did not notice until we got into the playground (!). Have 3 DCs to get out of the door in the AM so forgive myself for that .

I was cross when I saw that he did not have them on so said he would have to manage without them (he is not that shortsighted and he has been wearing them for 2 years so why does he keep forgetting them!!). Whereas normally I would go home and take them up to the school for him.

He came out of school and said that he kept on having to go up to the blackboard to see what the teacher had written and the TA had to help him. Now feel like complete shit! Was IBU??

OP posts:
addictedtomn · 14/09/2009 16:10

i often dont realise i havent got my glasses on untill i get in to the car and start pulling out of the drive thinking, why cant i see today!

your not bu tho, your ds, even at 7 needs to lern to take responsibility for his sight. he wont do it again in a hurry!

maybe i'm just harsh!

katiestar · 14/09/2009 16:34

YABU a bit anyway.
Forgetting PE kit or homework OK But leaving him without something he needs to cope with a 'disability' is unkind and unreasonable.He could have given himself an eyestrain headache.Thank goodness teh TA was a bit kinder than you are.
And what aboput the chilren the TA should have been helping if she hadn't had to cope with your DS

randomtask · 14/09/2009 16:38

I can see why you did it but personally I wouldn't have as I'd feel bad and know it was a waste of a school day plus, it could give him headaches, make him feel sick etc.

DSS is a pro at forgetting his lunch and I did once tell him that I wouldn't remind him the next day and he'd starve. However, when he did forget (two weeks later) I just told him to take a piece of pasta out of his 'reward jar' and pick up his lunch. He hasn't forgotten it for a few months now which I'm hoping means he's grown out of it (he's now 8).

lucykate · 14/09/2009 16:39

i suppose it depends on whether he was being a bit of a drama queen by going closer to the board, or if he really couldn't see. how strong is his prescription?, dd's is very strong and is blind as a bat without hers, she's also 7.

anyway, it's done now, at least it'll be a while before he (and you! ) forgets them again.

PixieOnaLeaf · 14/09/2009 17:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

pickyvic · 14/09/2009 17:22

how shortsighted is he? yes you were a bit unreasonable if he genuinely cant see without them.

Cheepz · 14/09/2009 17:26

i wear glasses - not sure i would class it as a disability - certainly doesn't enable me to get a car parking sticker and place outside my house for my neighbour to complain about......

YANBU - if you always come to the rescue he will not learn to be self sufficient and 7 is old enough

chimchar · 14/09/2009 17:27

can you get him a pair just for school to keep in his drawer?

i work in a school where a lot of the kids wear glasses...it really does make things difficult for them when they don't bring them...

Sassyfrassy · 14/09/2009 19:37

I'd definately try to get a second pair to keep at school I'm a teacher and it's a right faff for everyone, child included, if they don't have their glasses.

teamcullen · 14/09/2009 19:55

YANBU. Your DS managed, he is just trying to make you feel bad because he was probably asked why he didnt have them. If he is forgetting them regulary, he might just be trying to get out of wearing them. At least now he knows that he is not doing anybody any favours by forgetting to put them on. Least of all, himself.

LynetteScavo · 14/09/2009 20:01

YANBU -I speak as the mother of a very long sighted child who needs his glasses.

I don't consider him to have a disability.

Hopefully it will stop him forgetting them again.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 15/09/2009 08:33

Could you put a check list on the front door? We have one for lunch, book bag, school bag, pe and swimming kit, glasses.....

thesecondcoming · 15/09/2009 09:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
DontWannaHaveToMoveAGAIN · 15/09/2009 10:20

Well, I had to shout remind him to put his glasses on again this morning before we left the house so yesterday did not do much good. The TA said loudly 'Good, you've got your glasses on today' just to make me cringe even more. He is not that shortsighted (his prescription is quite weak) and I do not consider it a disability either . He does have asthma as well and I always make sure he has his inhaler .

I will be putting up a checklist thanks and if he does forget them again, I will take them up to the school as I can't live with the guilt .

OP posts:
paisleyleaf · 15/09/2009 10:24

That's a good idea to leave a spare set at the school
I'd be worried about headaches, and the whole day being a struggle - but that might be be because I've got no personal experience of wearing glasses.

InMyLittleHead · 15/09/2009 18:28

Alright katiestar, wind it back in re the TA comment.

YANB that U. OK it would have been better if he had had them, but it was a mistake, you have 3 kids to get sorted out. He's going to have to start remembering his glasses himself at some point. I know so many kids who never remember anything themselves because their parents always do it for them.

katiestar · 17/09/2009 14:07

InMyLittleHead - I'll make whatever comment I feel fit thankyou very much.

Seriously if you can see his face and not register he is not wearing them, then I think it is a bit much to expect him to.

Sassybeast · 17/09/2009 14:14

DD wears glasses ans it's certainly not a disbility. I have to remind her EVERY morning to put them on - along with reminding her to brush her teeth, put on her shoes etc etc. YANBU to forget them and YABU to be feeling guilty because shock horror the TA had to help him.

katiestar · 17/09/2009 15:59

A disability is something that hampers you doing something

Stigaloid · 17/09/2009 16:13

Get him a glasses necklace and plonk it around his neck - he will soon remember to keep them on his face!

TheLadyEvenstar · 17/09/2009 16:24

ds1 is 11 and I always have to remind him to check he has his glasses in his bag.....I am 34 and forget them sometimes.

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