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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

childrens names

89 replies

verazafira · 07/09/2009 20:16

a colleague of mine had a baby last week and named her florence. i had twins 3 months ago and one of those is florence, i dont mind this but still find it strange, but to cap it all today someone i know in our village has named her new baby martha which is my older daughters name(her other daughter goes to same nursery) i choose my childrens names as they are individual and have never gone with the crowd i am really mad about this , any advice, am i being unreasonable.

OP posts:
LadyHooHa · 07/09/2009 20:38

Sorry, they're both quite common names (as in 'frequently occurring', not as in 'chavvy'). I can sympathise, though; I gave my DD a name that's about 6780th in the 'popular names' chart, and have not yet met another one!

Hulababy · 07/09/2009 20:39

Martha and Florence are both lovely names, and actually both at the top of my fave list if I manage to have a second DC eventually.

They are not the most well known names around, but definitely not unique or individual.. Both are growing in popularity.

YABU to think other peope should not be able to use them. These people are not drectly related to you or anything, so I can't really see where your issue lies.

SpawnChorus · 07/09/2009 20:39

Florence and Martha are the Deborah and Michelle of this generation. You mark my words.

Pingpong · 07/09/2009 20:43

YABU but I don't know any Florences or Marthas - must just depend on where you live and what circles you move in.

edam · 07/09/2009 20:44

This has got to be a wind-up, surely... can't believe someone would think they have any right to determine what a colleague or someone whose child happens to go to the same nursery calls their own children.

If you really want to stand out, these days you should go for Peter, Jane, John or Mary...

Original poster
verazafira · 07/09/2009 20:54

yes i think you are right about the names just needed reasurance

OP posts:
FabBakerGirlIsBack · 07/09/2009 20:56

about what?

MissSunny · 07/09/2009 20:57

Message withdrawn

ThingumyandBob · 07/09/2009 20:58

Colleagues and people who live in your village come and go?.children, all being well are with you forever?chill, take it as a compliment.

I think they are being sensible, I worked with a women and I shortlisted her child?s name, my OH (who was doing his best to get another name to the top of the list) vetoed it and said he didn?t want to choose the name because it was the same as so and so?s daughter?silly really, 2 years later and I don?t work there anymore so it wouldn?t have made a bit of difference.

Anyway it?s the person who stands out from the crowd as being individual, not the name...

cory · 07/09/2009 21:01

so when you named your own children- did you actually check that there were no other Florences and Marthas in your part of the country or who might be moving there? Or is it only other people who are supposed to keep away from "your" names?

roundwindow · 07/09/2009 21:23

I can understand your exasperation OP but I think you're fighting a losing battle. It's such a bummer with names, you think you've hit on something that's cute and quirky and unique without being too 'out there' and weirdly every other parent who had their child around the same time as you had the same thought at the same time! Someone should study it.... there must be some sort of mathematical formula... something to do with there only being a limited amount of names available before you venture into far-too-wacky-even-for-us territory of rock royalty made-up names.

And to the Nicola who posted, I feel your pain. Born 1973. Named Sarah. Always one of three in every single sodding class I was ever in. 'But when we called you that we didn't know any others!' protested my parents. Hmpf.

stickylittlefingers · 07/09/2009 21:35

If it's any consolation - I have a common (in frequency!) name and I actually liked being one of 4 in my year with my name - being one of the "x"'s. Helped that I liked my name of course!

Perhaps if you called them Flossie and Mash?

LynetteScavo · 07/09/2009 21:40

You have chosen "in" names.

What did you expect?

The name I chose for DS2 shot up in popularity after he was born. I was slightly anoyed at the time, but hey.

It's not as if your sister used the same names as you. That would be odd.

cheesesarnie · 07/09/2009 21:40

rofl

my step sister named her ds the same as mine.she lives down the road.i was a bit at first but who cares!!!its a lovely name and mine and hers arent the only two (with that name)on the planet.

if you wanted your dc to be unique you shouldnt have called them something so pretty -you should have called them- bebop and alula

so yes yabu and a little silly tbh.

PeedOffWithNits · 07/09/2009 21:42

think yourself lucky

my 3rd baby died at birth, 10 months later DHs cousin named their baby the same name.we are stuck with that for life

scottishmummy · 07/09/2009 21:43

advice?worry about something other than your propensity to chose popular names.

or have the bastards who chose same names flogged and run out of town...though that might be tricky

skybright · 07/09/2009 21:46

When i had my DD2 named her what i thought was relatively uncommon at the time,then 12 weeks later my cousins wife had her DD and called her the same name,in retrospect it is not at all an uncommon name.

At the time there were three great grandchildren and two of then shared the same name.

I was not that bothered but she has gone on to have another two kids and used family names for both of them so i guess it is just her thing (or she lacks originality).

scottishmummy · 07/09/2009 21:47

friends MIL called her dog the same name as wee girl. now she and a big slobberinbg dog respond to same name

that is weird

skybright · 07/09/2009 21:49

PeedOffWithNits..Did they ask if they could use the name?that is very insensitive.

MillyR · 07/09/2009 21:54

I gave my daughter a name that I thought was uncommon but not odd. I found out (while searching for something else) that there are 2 girls with the same first and last name born in the year before and after her.

I really wish I had called her Mary.

My DS has a very popular and ordinary name, and yet he doesn't know any children with the same first name. The school is full of Joes and Judes instead. My only thoughts on it are that his popular name is dispersed across the whole country rather than congregating in particular social and geographical groups. I suspect Marthas and Florences congregate.

scottishmummy · 07/09/2009 21:56

old lady names are VVpopular at the mo

Jude68 · 07/09/2009 22:01

My DD1 is called Charlotte (DP chose it) and everywhere we go we hear some parent screaming "Charlotte!"
It's just one of those things...as others have said you don't own a name.
It beats me why these Victorian scullery maid names are so popular. They're freaking awful but hey, just my opinion.

LynetteScavo · 07/09/2009 22:03

Marthas and Florences congregate in villages.

PeedOffWithNits · 07/09/2009 22:04

skybright - no they did not ask, or inform us beforehand, as you can imagine we were shocked/devastated. DH mum and cousins mum did all the inbetweening and it turns out they had always wanted that name for a DD - in which case they had 10 months to tell/ask/break it to us gently or whatever

And opinion of some was that we should be over it and looking forward to our own new baby instead (I was pg again by then)

it has got easier though. family gatherings where MY dc are calling her name, which would have been their same age sibling, are the hardest.

dogonpoints · 07/09/2009 22:04

Unfortunately you have gone with a crowd as Martha nd Florence are all teh rage in some circles

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