To think this lady should count herself lucky I didn't punch her in the face?

[TAFKAtheUrbanDryad]

Dd (just gone 6 months) in the sling on my hip, with her head tilted back looking at the sky. In no danger whatsoever, perfectly secure. Middle-aged woman comes rushing up, pushes dd's head up, whose head snaps up alarmingly and shrieks, "She's not safe in there!"

I was very close to smacking her one, but was more concerned for dd, just turned my back on the woman so dd was safe and walked into the nearest shop - which, luckily, was the comic shop where I know the owner very well.

OMG I have fantasy fights all the time makes my anger dissipate much faster!!

YANBU - she could have said something if she was worried, she had no right to push your baby's head up, that was out of order.

So those of you who think IABU, it was ok for the woman to essentially assault my dd then? Would it be ok if I pushed you around, and then claimed I thought you might be in danger of some hypothetical situation?

You should have dialled 999 if you felt she had assaulted your dd.

And said what? "Hello officer, a woman pushed my baby's head up rather roughly 10 minutes ago." LOL. Police wouldn't have given a shit!

So it's ok for people to push babies around then?

Tafka, no you should have called the police there and then if you felt the woman assaulted your dd.

TAFKA - if you really did think that I was in danger then you'd be free to shove me as hard as it took. If you saw a dc about to run out into the road you'd grab them, wouldn't you? Although I still think the woman who grabbed your baby was way too rough. If it was that bad I think it would be reasonable to mention it to the police, because the way you've described this woman makes her sound downright dangerous. No need to phone 999 though.

Of course I would grab a child about to run into the road - I've already said I think it's great that people look out for kids. But if the "saving" action causes more damage than the what the person's trying to save from (IYSWIM) then it's a bit pointless, isn't it?

Dd has been really unsettled and whingey since the incident, especially at night which is not like her at all. It's probably teething but there's a nagging part of me which wonders if the force of having her head shoved up has done some damage to her neck. Now I'm probably being panicky and unreasonable but I'm wondering if lying flat is causing her pain.

Had dd been in any actual danger - ie, about to fall out, or actually falling - I'm sure I would have welcomed the intervention. Even if the stupid old twat lady had come up to me and said, "Ooh, she doesn't look very secure in there, are you sure she's ok?" while putting a hand on dd's back, or head gently, that would have been fine. But shoving her head up so that her neck may or may not have been hurt - no, not cool at all.

TLE - you do make me laugh.

If some1 did that to my baby I would have something to say. That is rude and disrespectful as well as dangerous.

If she honestly felt baby was in danger you say something you dont physically man handle some1 elses child.

Not good.

YANBU (I take it punch in the face, means got effing irritated by?). I carry my DD in her Didymos all the time and the range of muttered comments I have received is quite ridiculous. I don't mind the questions or compliments it's the insults and 'ooh she can't be comfortable in there' type ones that p*ss me off. Hasn't anyone ever noticed that if a two stone toddler is uncomfortable they kick up a huge fuss rather than cuddle up and go to sleep?????

I would be furious if someone touched my child in that way.

I've got a Didymos too oranges! Still can't quite get the hang of a back carry though, and I like the pouch sling for quickness!

I don't think these comments are actually positive actually, or to do with being helpful. Strangers don't generally make them as often to men. The reality is that it's easy to have a pop at mums and be critical in order to make yourself feel good/more knowledgeable/superior in some way, because nine times out of ten mums won't say anything back or just automatically feel guilty anyway.

My DH has noticed that quite often in the past people have had a go at me for lots of reasons that have nothing to do with me or which are simply down to misunderstandings (eg someone else's bag blocking a path, other people's children kicking off, my kids wearing full body sun protection swimsuits in outdoor swimming pools when they think this is something that is banned when it's not, that type of thing) whereas they never make these observations to him.

People are a lot less quick to help IME than criticise. That having been said, now I have four of the buggers the general public is leaving me alone and assuming I know what I am doing, although I have to say I don't do anything very differently to the first time around ...

TAFKA, YANBU. my DH used to get this sort of thing a lot when our son was a baby and he was a SAHD. Some (old) ladies seem to think that a man cannot look after a baby. I wonder if she would have done it if a woman had the baby in a sling.

I am a woman! Yep, definitely a woman!!

I don't understand why you didn't say anything to her? If she assaulted your baby, why did you just walk away?

YABU.
If it had happened to me and my baby, I would probably have thought, in order:

a) eh? what's going on?
b)is my child upset at being shoved a bit?.. seems to be ok
c)Hmm, lady a bit odd, I wonder what that was all about?

I would not think in a million years:

'that woman is glad I didn't punch her in the face'.

And I know you didn't mean 'punch in the face' literally.

boobs - the reason I didn't say anything was because I wasn't sure that she wasn't going to try and shove dd around more. Dd had already had her head pushed up, and I didn't know that the woman wouldn't try to take her out of the sling, which would have been very dangerous.

That was my thought process, really, such as it was. I just wanted to make sure dd was safe!