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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at my neighbours dog barking in the garden at 6.15am today?

64 replies

TheLemur · 21/08/2009 10:33

It's the second time it's happened this week, the last time was monday morning when it woke us all up at 3.15am and again at 6.15am

If it was just me and I could go back to sleep I wouldn't mind but the fact that it wakes DS (2) who is then grotty really peeves me (we all usually wake about 8am)

However, I am genuinely very ignorant as to the mechanics of dogs. Maybe it needs to be let out when it needs a wee? It's a Yorkshire terrier (I think) and I really don't mind it barking in the daytime (despite working from home), I just object to feeling like a zombie all day and not being able to concentrate at work due to being so tired

I don't know the neighbour other than a quick smile and hello so I really don't know what to do. I don't want to come across like a selfish arse so maybe I should write a letter (or is that worse!?!) The last thing I want is bad feeling between us but I have been quietly seething about the barking for over 6 months now.

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 21/08/2009 10:42

Any chance it is the Parcel Force van arriving? Or the bin men.

For ordinary dog barking there isn't anything to 'do' unless it goes on for ages (which would suggest it was being left at home).

I just think 6.15 isn't early - but I live in a town centre where it's getting noisy that time in the morning.

mosschops30 · 21/08/2009 10:47

Thought you might be my neighbour then
It is of course horribly early if youre still sleeping, dh and me both up at 6am weekdays for work, so let the dog out for a wee and he barks as he runs out the back door, but doesnt stand there barking or anything.
I would say that if its just the odd bark then not much you can do, but if they leave it out and it barks for an hour thats different

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 10:49

Its a dog, that's what they do. Our dog goes crazy sometimes in the middle of the night if there's foxes or badgers around.

I'm sorry its disturbing you, but its entirely normal.

We recieved a letter from the council the other week with a complaint about a dog barking - turned out they'd got the wrong address entirely and was "road" instead of "crescent", which is about three miles away - and what annoyed us most was that the individuals hadn't come to speak to us, had just gone straight to the council. If you really have a problem, and its happened over the last six months like you say, go round and talk to them. Just be prepared that they won't nessicarily appriciate it, and will probably just roll their eyes.

Danceaway · 21/08/2009 10:50

I don't think there'd be much your neighbour could do about it. Sorry 4 u tho. Letter would be worse than a direct approach. Do you think you could ask your neighbour, nice and casually, if there's anything she could do about it as its affecting your ds? The answer will prob be no but at least you'll have done something and neighbour shouldn't take offence. V tricky. Hope dog calms down as it gets older!

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 10:52

Also - is it a new dog? Especially if its a rescue dog it might still be settling in.

CaresMildly · 21/08/2009 10:56

As my dog is getting older his bladder control is weakening - hence we have to let him out in the early hours nowadays. Outside is obviously different to daytime - foxes, bats, cats, etc so more to smell and more to make him have a woof. It's annoying (for us as well as we're shivering by the back door waiting for him to finish so we can get back to bed) but not really sure of the way around it.

Something stirs in the bushes, he'll bark - me then adding to the row by telling him to hush probably wouldn't make the neigbours feel much better.

In all honesty though if it was affecting someone else (and twice in one week doesn't sound too excessive) I would rather they had a word than wrote me a letter. I don't want to offend the neighbours but if it were you and I explained that it's because he's old and I'm not doing it for fun, would you understand? I think it's reasonable-ish - in a neighbourhood there does have to be some give and take. So I think you're being a tiny bit unreasonable as twice isn't a lot, but if it carries on then definitely have a word and explain why it affects you.

themoon66 · 21/08/2009 10:59

YANBU

I have dogs on three sides... one gets let out at 5am to bark, which sets off the terrier in the next door garden (lives out). On my third side, the neighbours keep 3 dogs in their garage. They are very big dogs with big loud barks. They also hurl themselves at the metal garage doors.

Sometimes I feel like I'm living in the middle of a rescue kennel

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:03

Can't believe there are people on here who are saying it is OK to disturb people, because that's what dogs do! If your dog is disturbing people that much, get it a muzzle. FGS, a child's sleep is way more important than letting your dog get excited by a fox. The odd bark OK, but not several times through the night, that is just not on.

CaresMildly · 21/08/2009 11:07

Muzzling dogs does not keep them quiet, it stops them biting.

Dogs are part of people's families and they have a right to behave in a natural manner. If they need to go into the garden at night and then they make a bit of noise then so be it.

The problem could easily be a delivery van, for eg my milkman quite often wakes me up at 4am because he tends to sit outside my window with his engine running, but I just have to live with it. It's part and parcel of life.

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:10

No, dogs are dogs, CM, not people. Yes, people have a right to do what they like within their homes, but not to the extent that they constantly disturb their neighbours. the occasional bark, like I said, is fine, but if your dog is regularly disturbing your neighbours, and you cannot control it, then I think that you have to rethink your decision to keep that dog. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but your neighbours did not choose to be disturbed by your animal.

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:11

Oh, and people have a right to sleep.

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 11:13

Unless the owner is actually out in the garden, poking said dog with a stick to make it bark, its hardly the owners fault. Would you complain if it was a young baby crying in the middle of the night? Dogs become like another family member - we had our last dog for fifteen years.

CaresMildly · 21/08/2009 11:15

You are so right, people do have a right to sleep, would you have a word with my baby about that??

You can sound as harsh as you like, I doubt you'd persuade a single dog-owner that their animal was making an unreasonable noise. I don't think my dog is, but my neighbour may disagree.

CaresMildly · 21/08/2009 11:18

Entirely in agreement with you ErikaMaye - my boy is 11 now and of course his habits are changing as he's getting older.

The proposal to "rethink my decision to keep" him because he needs to have a slash in the middle of the night is laughable.

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:21

I would absolutely not complain if it was a baby making the noise, because the baby is a person. that is what babies do, and will, hopefully, stop crying during the night after several years.

Yes your dog may be a part of your family, but, as stated earlier, it is a dog. Not a person. And therefore not subject to the same "rights" as a person. And I suspect noise enforcement officers would have more to say about a dog barking through the night than a baby crying through the night.

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 11:21

Maybe I should stop waddling to the loo in the middle of the night incase the light or sound of the loo flushing bothers my neighbours... What do you think CaresMildly?

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 11:22

"that is what babies do"

Yes - babies cry to communicate.

And dogs bark to do the same.

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:23

Erika, you seem to have a few issues distinguishing between humans and pets... I have already stated no issues with unavoidable human noise...

Danceaway · 21/08/2009 11:23

Uh oh, lay down your arms stonethecrows you'll never persuade a dog lover/owner that their dog has less right to a good bark than someone else's child does to a decent night's sleep...

However 6.15 isn't that early, dh wakes me up that time every day to get ready for work. A neighbour starts his van up before then and prob wakes dd1 most days. It is just part of life; try not to let it bother you; shut your windows; buy some earplugs!

ErikaMaye · 21/08/2009 11:25

And you seem to have a few issues with recognising that dogs cannot be forced to stop barking on all occassions. You're willing to accept that humans make noise, but not animals?

Danceaway · 21/08/2009 11:26

that last bit directed to thelemur sorry to be sloppy

stonethecrows · 21/08/2009 11:28

Oh FGS Erika, if you had read my posts you will see I have no problem with dogs barking occasionally, it is just those that bark constantly disturbing everyone around.

As Danceaway so rightly says, I will never convince you that your dog's needs are not as important as a human child's sleep, so will have to agree to disagree with you.

OP YANBU

Danceaway · 21/08/2009 11:29

Erikamaye do you think it's reasonable for a noisy dog to regularly disturb people between 11pm and 7am?

CaresMildly · 21/08/2009 11:31

If dogs are out barking all night, every night then yes something should be done, not least because there is an issue about their own care, as well as the effect on everyone else around.

If a dear old family pet staggers out at 2am for a widdle and a yip then no, get a grip. Noises occur in neighbourhoods and you have to live with that.

I never said that dogs were people but dogs do have a right to express their own natural behaviour. Barking at strange noises in the dark is a natural behaviour - and one which has worked in humankind's favour over the millenia that dogs and humans have lived together.

GetOrfMoiLand · 21/08/2009 11:34

"Dogs are part of people's families and they have a right to behave in a natural manner. If they need to go into the garden at night and then they make a bit of noise then so be it."

What a ridiculous statement.

OP - I would be the same as you and highly annoyed. There is nothing more annoying than a dog barking repeatedly. TBH I would have a word with the neighbour, and if she is as dismissive as some of the people on this thread are, go to the council if the problem persists.

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