to think this is INCREDIBLY rude?!

[Disenchanted3]

I was walking round a carboot this morning DH was at a stall buying crap so I walked on with DD,

2 rather portly women walked up to mea and one handed me a leaflet and the converstaion folled as such ...

Her : "Hello, can I interest you in joing my weight loss programme?"

Me -

Her - "Don't look so offended, we are trying to help you"

Me - -

Her - just staring at me.

I handed the leaflet back and said "Thanks, made me feel great about myself today'

Her " cheer up, why don't you smile, you have a beautiful daughter"

and she walks away.

I won't lie, I filled up, I was feeling pretty good this morning, I'd put a dress on for the first time in a while and it was sunny, I was happy until she came over, then had the cheek to say 'cheer up!'

DH was fuming when he found out why I was upset,

AIBU to think that weigh loss services are sought out by people who want to loose weight and people should not 'target' people they percieve as overweight and offer them this service??

moondog, you know that really wasn't necessary. I'm another one that would rather be fat that one of the BMI police like you clearly are. What a way to live.

That is pretty mean. Try to rise above it. Remember that you were feeling happy before these idiots approached you. Don't let them spoil your day.

They were being a bit insensitive. I'm not sure about incredibly rude. But moondog was being rude. With a baby of only 6 months, and 3 DC under 5, it is natural that you might be carrying a bit extra. So you will work on it if and when you're ready.

it's a business, the people handing out leaflets. Remind yourself that they make money out of people losing weight.

Can you imagine if someone came up to you asking if you wanted breast enlargement surgery, if you wanted laser surgery on acne scars, creams for hair thinning, waxing for a lady moustache.

It is rude to look at someone and assume a physical attribute needs 'sorting'

Moondog, why so rude? And as someone who works in the NHS, you must know perfectly well that being underweight is equally bad for one's health. And that bulling people doesn't do anything to help them change their behaviour.

If you are seriously interested in interventions that actually work, rather than just sneering, go and have a look at Lifeworks in Newcastle.

ilovemydog - no, they make their money out of people trying to lose weight and failing. If diet plans and clubs actually worked, they'd go out of business. The stats show most people who diet put the weight back on again with a little extra on top within a year or two. Losing weight permanently is hard.

I stand corrected.

moondog - you never used to be like this! Blunt and to the point maybe, but not rude for the sake of it

I eat a relatively healthy diet compared to most, i am overweight, i should do something about it, i will, when the time is right. I certainly wont be enroling on some ridiculous weight loss plan.

To lose weight is simple, eat less shit (thts different to eating less) and exercise.

Most of the weight loss programs promote a very unhealthy way of losing weight too quickly.

disaenchanted-your pic on your profile shows a beutiful lady!
dont let it get to you-if you are happy thats all that matters.

I think you are being over sensitive. They weren't rude, they handed you a leaflet. Clearly you are overweight (by your own admission) and a lot of overweight people want to lose weight.

If you truly were happy with your weight at this point in time (due to motherhood) then you would not be this upset.

No soup, ive got baby weight,

its not like im 15 stone or anything like that, this is not a reflection of my lifestyle.

Its down to pregnancy.

And I never said I was truely happy with my weight.

I just don't want random women questioning me over my weight in the middle of crowded carboot with all surrounding eyes looking at them as horrified as me.

It was highly embarressing.

Was her name Marjorie Dawes? It sounds like her.

Plenty of people have looked back and realised this sort of moment was the wake up call they needed.
Still insensitive but would you like to lose weight ?

I would at some point, but when I decide I want to I will find a away that suits me,

I don't want people approaching me.

If you had a crooked nose and you decided you wanted surgery you would go to see a plastic surgeon.

Would it be acceptable for a plastic surgeon to walk round town looking at peoples noses then approaching those he deemed inperfect?

Thats my problem wiuth this situation.

YANBU at all

you should be able to tackle weight issues as and when you are ready, in your own way and at your own pace. Being shanghaied by portly women bearing leaflets is not on. It would have spoilt my day.

Your annoyance might have burned up the odd calorie or two.

Must go, time for a pie.....

I bet you all think I look like Beth Ditto, I don't I need to loose 1.5 stone thats not a massive amount.

It may well be heading in that direction, people approaching you in Sainsbury's and saying christ have you considered sorting that nose/boobs/double chin out ?

lol @ Beth Ditto

You are completely FINE, if you only have 1.5 stone to lose then there is NO WAY anyone but yourself is noticing it

people thought nothing of approaching me about ds2's birthmark when he was littler though (on my profile if you're curious )

we had comments like "what a shame, you really should have had that off by now"

"he looks like he's been hit by a train"

"can't you get something done about that"

bsatards

Disenchanted, I was just reading on the other thread about Colin Hendry's wife, who died after a botched liposuction op because she thought she looked fat compared to other women. She's left four children, who I've no doubt loved her just the way she was.

One and a half stone is not a huge amount to lose so don't be discouraged. Lose the weight when you feel good and ready. Good luck with it.

What I meant, before I was (rightly) corrected, was that weight loss is a business. It preys on women's insecurities.

How lovely that your DH was outraged for you.

"Im not happy to be overweight, but right now I don't give a toss"

That is what I meant by "happy" - that you don't give a toss about being overweight right now. However, clearly you do give a toss.

They didn't question you about your weight, they handed you a leaflet. Like they'd handed them to loads of other people at the boot sale.

They didn't do a hard sell routine, they didn't call you a fat cow, they didn't say "no, really you need to do this". They were polite about it.

I could probably do with losing a stone or toning up but I wouldn't be at all offended for someone to hand me a leaflet, I'd just take it, think not for me right now and bin it. Just like I did to the man touting for business from LA fitness at our school fair. Except I also laughed at him (in a friendly manner).