to let all the home grown produce go to waste because I'm too lazy/depressed to pick it?

[GertieGoat]

We moved into our dream home 5 years ago and it has a lovely big veg patch which I have tended over the years.

I now find I am unmotivated to pick the fruit and it is going to waste, I am horrified at myself.

Please help motivate me, as I think there is a link to laziness and depression.

You are not lazy, you may be depressed.

Instead give yourself credit for all the hard work you have put in over the years

When you get up tomorrow take a colander and fill it and go back inside. Only do a few minutes, it will make you feel better.

And do not beat yourself up for what you don't manage to do.

What's the easiest way to save it, in a freezer bag? Stick it unwashed in a freezer bag if you don't want to do more and then when you feel better in a few weeks get it out, defrost and wash it and make a crumble or something.

And when you've picked your colander full tomorrow make yourself a nice cup of tea and enjoy your garden.

And remember there are other years....

depressed is not lazy. if you are depressed you should seek some help for it, and find out why you are depressed.

If you are not depressed and are therefore being lazy, then I am very of your circs that you can afford to let it go to waste, when you have a great opportunity to reduce your grocery bills.

If there is too much to use, then pass it out to friends, neighbours and family. Have a Pick Your Own day and invite friends/neighbours/family over to clear it all out - then you can feel Noble as well as Not Wasteful

What makes it worse is that I feel I should not feel down but as a SAHM I'm lonely so don't want to do more mindless things.

My dc pick some of it but not the quantities to make a difference.

I once offered others to pick it and they were so grateful with the bags full it made me feel worse.

It could well be sheer laziness which is making me depressed .

I am living the life I had dreamed about.

???
why did it make you feel worse?

If you are having troubles being a SAHM then have a Pick Your Own party - invite people over for a coffee and a bunch of peas/rhubarb/cabbage/whatever it is.

Have a jam-making party! Or a pickling party! Join the New Look WI (they're trying to recruit Bright Young Things now)

what is there around for you to join?

So if the problem is loneliness how long have you felt like this?

Feel for you.

ah now, maybe it is because you really don't have enough to stimulate you - can you find something to do that fires you brain cells more as well, e.g. a part time or online course?

In good years I would make 100s of jars of jams and chutneys to give away to friends, fetes etc. I have been very generous I think.

It made me worse because they picked with a gusto and excitement I used to feel but now don't.

There are recipes I would love to try but I feel sad instead and then read MN threads for hours on end then realised one of my main crops has gone over without me realising Oh what waste!

Yes I have a doctorate and I'm not using my braincells and my braincells are rebelling. I loved studying but can't really retrain unless I want to be a perpetual student which I don't.

I live deep in the countryside and the ages of my dc and distance to major towns rules out regular employment. Plus my confidence is low.

bum. But never mind retraining, why don't you do a course in something you haven't done before but always fancied a go at, like photography/ art/ English Lit/ learn a new foreign language/ learn a musical instrument?

TBH, you don't sound depressed, you sound jaded. And as though you should be on top of the world because you now have your perfect life and it just isn't as good as you thought it would be so you are disappointed.

perhaps you could consider starting a cottage industry, actually make some dosh on your produce? Do some interesting jams/pickles, like quince and asparagus or something? [joke - that sounds vile but you get my drift?]

ou are BORED, woman!

Agree you sound bored which is the trigger for making you feel depressed.

I think thumbwitch has some really good suggestions, but for a short-term measure have you thought about the Hugh Fernley Whatsit Landshare thing?

They have people who will just "help" as well as people who want plots of land to tend.

You could end up with some real characters who you might find interesting and because it's not a one-off sort of thing there's less pressure. Here's a link landshare

Just a thought any way.

Wow, aren't you all the best I feel better already and thanks for the link, I'll sign up.

Plus I'll get the colander out first thing in the morning and see what I can salvage from the pigeons.

I'll try some experimental recipes too!

well done - hope you feel better when you're out there picking - the thing to do is focus on the good stuff, ignore what has gone over except to see it as excellent compost material for next year.

Good luck with the experimental recipes - but please don't try quince and asparagus!

I haven't picked my strawberries either. Don't feel that I am lazy or depressed - nor do I feel guilt (perhaps a little regret). Just wish there was more time in the day...

Gertiegoat, hope you had a better day today, although if you had rain like we did then you won't have been picking anything in the garden!

Hi thumb! I picked loads of gooseberries yesterday and will be picking raspberries today, I have a glut.

I think I was overwhelmed with what needed doing and bored because I needed some human kindness which I got here so xxxxxxx

I've got lunch at a friend's house tomorrow and I've offered to make the dessert, I'm going to make a raspberry coulis to go with the choc mousse (also been looking at gooseberry fool recipes so might make both!)as there will be several friends there.

I also heard (through MN) about Flylady.net which I am going to sign up to basically to get some fun into structuring the day, as it didn't take me long, only 15 mins or so to have a colander full and feel some sort of achievement.

It is such a fine line between getting bored/ losing motivation in general (I used to run regularly now don't)/getting overwhelmed/ then depressive thoughts setting in and the GUILT.

It's also amazing how some constructive advice can fire you up into being motivated again!

I can't thank you enough >

ooh thanks! I love raspberries and chocolate - my DH does a mean chocolate pavlova with raspberries (courtesy of Nigella's summer book) and gooseberry fool is just fab!

I'm so glad it helped - and that your raspberries didn't get drowned in the rain!

Well done for lifting yourself out of that cycle

Gooseberry fool! Yum!!!!

BTW they freeze brilliantly - cook them with just a little sugar (you can always add more when you defrost them should you need them to be a little sweeter) until they're going soft then divvy them up into freezer bags and you're away!

Great advice, will try both those ideas, thanks xxxx

Hi Gertie - hope you managed to salvage all your raspberries - I was over at my Dad's today and picked a couple of handfuls but was sad to see that another similar amount had withered on the canes. It made me think of you and I told my Dad - he said he knew how you felt (but different reason - he is missing my Mum who died 2 years ago )

Have you come up with any weird interesting combinations yet?

We have a plum tree which bears fruit every year, but I never get round to climbing up and picking them at the right time.

The birds eat the plums though, so I feel happy on their behalf. They get a nice tasty treat, and I get to hear their happy songs.

If you don't pick it this year, it won't be wasted. There will be creatures in the garden who will appreciate it. And you can make a fresh start next year.