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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do I risk social death for my ds by not doing party bags?

160 replies

MadameDefarge · 25/06/2009 12:41

Seriously, it is his first birthday a his new school. Ds is nine. I have booked bowling alley, and will feel them in groovy Amercian diner style cafe there, but I am losing the will to live over the party bag thing.

Now woolworths has gone, it will be impossible to do them in any cheap way...

So AIBU in thinking the little sods can live without them, given the very expensive treat they are already getting, or will I ruin his reputation in his new school?

OP posts:
Original poster
MadameDefarge · 25/06/2009 16:47

Rosie, you are inspired! brilliant idea!

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 25/06/2009 16:48

will let you off then

dc1 had a build a bear party for her 6th bady

was fab

sayithowitis · 25/06/2009 16:51

madame, a quick search on the internet reveals that there are five branches of Hawkins bazaar in London as well as 13 branches of Wilkinsons.

If you want to do party bags do, if you don't, don't!

EugeneHCrabs · 25/06/2009 16:55

I do em and love em

FairLadyRantALot · 25/06/2009 16:58

Hmmm.I hate partybags...and don't see the need for them, whatsoever...but if you wanted to...I suppose those mysterybags, or whatever they are called...for like 99p might be an idea...

although, by the age of 9, I think partybags become a bit passe...

rofl at feeling the Kids, though

RosieMBanks · 25/06/2009 17:07

Glad you like it...hope the party is great fun, with lots of happy, friendly feelings...!!!

piscesmoon · 25/06/2009 17:14

I think 9 yrs is plenty old enough to stop. I would wrap up a piece of birthday cake and put it in a plastic bag and leave it at that. I hate them-and the way DCs expect them.

CMOTdibbler · 25/06/2009 17:18

I haven't done party bags, and won't. We never had party bags when I was a child (lucky to get cake in a piece of kitchen roll) and I don't remember it being an issue

zeke · 25/06/2009 17:21

I put cake in a bag and a small packet of sweets AND call it a party bag! The party bags with games/pens/pencils/plastic etc are certainly in the minority amongst my son's friends. My son thinks 'party bag' means sweets tbh, he has very little interest in the rest.

pointydog · 25/06/2009 17:23

Only read op but I don't care if I'm repeating.

It is easy to do cheap party bags. Big supermarkets specialise in fairly good quality cheap crap (I know, I know, oxymoron).

Tesco do a Value pack of 8 gel pens which are pretty good and they only cost 36p. For a whole pack of pens. They often have special offers on little packs of post-its, hihglighters etc which kids love.

Cheap sweets, bit of cake, bob's you runcle.

zazizoma · 25/06/2009 17:29

I think favours are nice for any party, whether wedding, christening whatever.

I do very strongly object to the cheap plastic junk that normally goes into these party bags.

I'm on the side of a nice little "bag" with cake, cookies perhaps cut into bowling pin shapes, and call it a day. The photo idea as a thank you to follow is great.

SlartyBartFast · 25/06/2009 17:31

she is not doing it, she doesnt feel like it anymore

Original poster
MadameDefarge · 25/06/2009 17:33

slarty, I am hiring you as my official spokesperson.

Just stop mentioning "feelings"

OP posts:
pointydog · 25/06/2009 17:35

Kids love party bags. Spread joy.

fifitot · 25/06/2009 17:53

I love them and love putting them together - so there!

Original poster
MadameDefarge · 25/06/2009 18:34

fifi and pointy, I promise to do party bags for you if ever I have the nerve to go to an MN meet up!

But ds and mates are going without.

OP posts:
pointydog · 25/06/2009 20:24

thsank you, defarge. I think you are safe though. I have no plans to go on a meet-up.

Original poster
MadameDefarge · 25/06/2009 20:30

I've got special MN goodies all ready to go!

ah yes, a fruitshoot, a greggs sausage roll...vouchers for agent provocateur>>

OP posts:
TsarChasm · 25/06/2009 20:34

Well, I like party bags and won't be stopping.

Yurtgirl · 25/06/2009 20:37

Tescos do great plastic stuff for party bags - currently they have small drawstring bags (ipod/phone cover) with a football on very reasonable

bitsnbobs · 25/06/2009 21:27

I did panic partybags for DS 2's birthday and ended up with the crappest party bag ever, the best thing in it was the toy parachute which didn't float properly when dropped

I now avoid doing parties altogether by taking the kids on a chosen day out with a few close friends-I am so mean .

I think kids parties have gone way over the top now though. When I was younger the most we had was musical bumps and a bit of cake at the end wrapped in a tissue.

mrspooh · 25/06/2009 21:38

you are giving them a fantastic activity, and meal. that is very generous to start with. wouldnt even consider a party bag after that.

creditcrunchedmum · 26/06/2009 00:01

A pact with other mums at school's a good idea. Then the little darlings won't know any different.

Lollipop, balloon or cake is fine (I always make lots of fairy cakes instead of one big one - no cutting, no fighting over the icing and lots less mess).

One mum at school always does a lucky dip at the end of the party. Everyone gets one small wrapped up prezzie, and it's fun.

Check out ideas for cheap and cheerful parties at thriftymums.com/story/arty-party

Clary · 26/06/2009 00:54

Mme Defarge (luvin yr name btw) I like party bags and so usually do them (tho DD's party on Sunday comes with them included so I am not doing much there!).

But but but - there is no need at this age. DS1 was 10 and still wanted them but I have caved in on the theme/quality stuff etc and they were mostly sweets (the kind I hate too - those sandy lollies and moaom chews) and a book from the Book People. But if he had said no that wd've been fine.

I do think they say "party's over now" - at an 8yo do DD went to the hostess gave everyone an Easter egg (it was in April ) which I'm guessign cost £1 and was v v v well received! So maybe it's worth getting a small gift each, as s/one else says, how about a £1 shop aeroplane or similar?

Clary · 26/06/2009 00:57

BTW you try yr best in vain anyway; DS2's party bag was a football pop-up or sheet of footie stickers, party popper, party blower, cake, stripy squeaky sausage balloon, football keyring and a Horrid Henry book. Not bad?

But DH overheard one miserable child saying "there's not much in here"

I might have been tempted to ask for it back if I had heard