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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DD wants food in bed, an hour after bedtime - quick advice needed

28 replies

disillusioned1234 · 24/06/2009 21:04

I need some support here. She is crying for food. She was offered, and ate part of, a nutritious and varied dinner. (Chicken, Rice, peas, banana). She did not eat all of it. Before bed I offered her more food as is part of the bedtime routine. I make it very clear that is her last offer for food of the day. She said she did not want anything (7 pm).

DD is now crying for food (9pm).

If I feed her now that is teaching her 1. she doesn't have to eat dinner 2. she can also refuse her offer of a bedtime snack. 3. she can just stay up past her bedtime and i will bring her food.

She is 4 1/2.

Any advice appreciated - would YOU feed your child if they were crying for food an hour after their bedtime, when they had been offered plenty of food during the day?

thanks

OP posts:
MaDuggar · 24/06/2009 21:05

Nope, I wouldnt, but i am a Stern Harsh Mummy lol

BuckBuckMcFate · 24/06/2009 21:05

No.

She is 4 and a half so should be able to understand the consequences of saying no to food.

Stand by what you have said and tell her she can have a big breakfast in the morning.

fucksticks · 24/06/2009 21:06

no food

Ewe · 24/06/2009 21:06

No, I would give her a glass of milk though.

PrammyMammy · 24/06/2009 21:06

I wouldn't. My mum would call me cruel but she will think she can do it any time.

NeedCoffee · 24/06/2009 21:06

no I wouldn't, I'd tell her she can have a drink of water but thats it, I know its hard, hopefully she'll learn her lesson

JoPie · 24/06/2009 21:06

Nope, I would def not. Setting a v dangerous precedent there, and she certainly won't starve.

Overmydeadbody · 24/06/2009 21:06

No, I wouldn't

You just have to be firm here. If you think she really is hungry to the point that her stomach is hurting then give her a glass of milk.

cupcakesinthesnow · 24/06/2009 21:07

If it is a one off I would. She may just be extra hungry sudenly as happens to me sometimes! If she stated asking every night I would refuse and be super strict.

Offer her a drink as sometimes we think we are hungry when we are in afct thirsty

NeedCoffee · 24/06/2009 21:07

ooh I am harsher than you Ewe

NeedCoffee · 24/06/2009 21:08

ah but cupcakes, shes already been crying for an hour, if op gives in now shes gonig have it soooooooo hard tomorrow night and the next night..

MakemineaGandT · 24/06/2009 21:09

Absolutely not. And I'd cut out the bedtime snack thing too. I find feeding my children a large lunch and then a more snacky tea works - at tea time they are usually tired and less inclined to eat a "proper" meal

FlyMeToDunoon · 24/06/2009 21:09

Nope and I have a 4.9yr old.
I got into a milk drink at bedtime routine but even that wasn't being drunk half the time so NO I am firm now.

MrsMcCluskey · 24/06/2009 21:09

I would give her a biscuit and some milk
She wont sleep if she is really hungry.
Just make it clear that she is hungry BECAUSE she didnt eat her dinner and that this is the last time she will get a biscuit in bed.

Curiousmama · 24/06/2009 21:09

Is she normally a good sleeper or could it be an excuse for attention? I would give her some but I'm soft about such things and not the best person to ask. The others are probably right. Agree she may just be thirsty?

Ewe · 24/06/2009 21:10

That isn't hard NC, I'm a softie, I say glass of milk but I would probably in reality be giving her a slice of bread or biscuit with it .

Must toughen up!

gomez · 24/06/2009 21:12

I would get her up, give her some supper and then send back to bed - no food in bed. But this would be a one-off. Actually I am surprised to be in the minority - always thought I was hard, me .

DesperateHousewifeToo · 24/06/2009 21:12

I would say ' no food, it's bedtime. You should be asleep'.

I would not get into a discussion about it either.

I probably would not even do milk, maybe a small amount of water in the bottom of a cup.

Mutt · 24/06/2009 21:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mutt · 24/06/2009 21:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Boys2mam · 24/06/2009 21:15

Just give her 'boring' food to put something on her tummy - bread/butter or a cracker? And a little milk. This works for my DS(5).

gomez · 24/06/2009 21:15

Sorry should have added that I would relent on this occasion because I don't always want to eat by the clock, it has been hot today and she perhaps was just not hungry earlier.

A single occasion doesn't a habit make - next time however she would have no chance.

My three always take water to bed to preempt the whole I am thirsty thing anyway.

JackBauer · 24/06/2009 21:17

No, I would give her water but nothing else. She is old enough to learn how to get extra food if you give in!

disillusioned1234 · 24/06/2009 21:17

she's still on milk I'm afraid to say. So, she HAS milk next to the bed. I just heard the last drop of it drain.

DD sleeps through the nite or should I say does not bother her parents in the night (some times she seems so tired in the morning I wonder if she is awake at night and just being quiet).

but the putting to bed is a battle, always. anything for attention. anything to avoid sleep.

thanks for so many quick - and firm! - replies.

OP posts:
gomez · 24/06/2009 21:17

Aye, I just like to think I am Mutt.

Actually I am but DH is not and he has [splutter, cough] taught me loads...

Do I need to leave MN now?

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