new parents i met yesterday with 4 day old baby

[iateallthecreameggsyummy]

Was slightly and at this so aibu??

Couple came into restaurant yesterday with a tiny new born baby. Of course me expecting my own I asked the parents if i could have a look, said how cute he was etc and asked how old he was. Mum said he was born on Saterday, i commented how great he was being fast asleep looking so adorable! The dad then tells me 'well he's been a little the past 2 days!' I just commented 'oh well he's only a few days old' and left them to it.

Was not juding them that on way home from hospital (she still had wrist band on) they'd popped in for a fry up she probably needed it but at being a little s**t the past couple days

lol at 'are you expecting your first?'

Why 'obviously they hdd a difficult birth' 'obviously they're sleep deprived' etc.
Maybe the dad just isn't a very nice person.

Oh dear

Was it a joke that didn't work maybe?

replace the word shit with the word monkey/bugger/nuisance/pain and tell me how yours changes?

Your right though, people view words differently, not everyone is offended by the word shit, but most would be offended by cunt though, but he didnt say that.

This is at risk of being an "AIBU by stealth". We've responded to the OP - where we hear nothing else about this couple. Now it turns out the OP thought he was generally unpleasant and nasty in a way that his partner had to tell him to "leave it", which puts a different complexion on the whole exchange.

So - from the OP he could be a normal nice person, who has been through a major struggle and is saying something he doesn't really mean as a result of stress/exhaustion/relief.

But now we know he was unpleasant in other ways. So maybe he's just not nice, and will be a lousy father and partner.

It could have been a joke. I would have not been amused if my DH had said that though. TBH, I wouldn't worry about it.

Maybe he isnt a nice person, or maybe he is a very nice bloke who has just seen his wife go through a tramatic birth and is now stressed out and sleep deprived, who knows?? who are we to judge

I wouldnt have judged him but hey ho

Nicely put, VingegarTits. I agree.

Not offended by the word shit in the slightest. Just the context. To a newborn baby.

am on the phone atm not ignoring you all will reply in a second

Maybe he just doesn't have the best vocabulary or didn't have time to think of a better way of phrasing it. For all we know, he could have been left thinking 'damn, I shouldn't have said that' and maybe spent the next 12 hours apologising profusely to his wife.

well has someone who put her new born down on teh bed in teh middle of the night and shrieked 'what the f*ck do you want' i shall not judge. sleep deprivation is makes a crazed haridan out of the best of us.

LOL, you wouldn't be happy with the terms of endearment we use in our house then!

I think the choice of word is clearly inappropriate but if that's what slipped out then can be overlooked, in isolation.

However. I think more important is the fact that a 4 day old baby is being described as a "little sh*t". In public. To strangers.

It's both odd and sad, in my book. (you'll all have to read my book sometime... )

Agree with VT and TCM. YABU

DH and I were drunk with fatigue when dd was 4 days old.

We couldn't even be civil to each other and probably said the same thing to people. DH was doing an MA at the time and was sharing the feeds.He was frazzled

You saw maybe 45 minutes of their life. Stop being so judgey.

lighten up OP.

People's use of fruity language is very personal. One man's little shit is another man's cheeky monkey - you catching my drift?

With PFB DD I never dreamed of saying anything like this about her.

However, DS, who is currently on an ever decreasinly scale of hours per night spent actually sleeping, has become affectionately known between myself and DH as a little f**cker. He is especially referred to as that when we go to sleep each night placing bets on whether we'll be woken at a time which starts with a 4, or with a 5 .

We wouldn't say it to anyone but each other, and it makes us laugh and we are so LOVING him when we say it in that rueful manner only a parent can.

But only you were there to judge the tone I suppose. On the face of it, YABU I think.

Also, it's not impossible that tired new parents are a bit fed up with strangers cooing over the baby and want a bit of peace and privacy therefore say something shocking in order to make strangers (however wellmeaning and friendlhy) back off and leave them alone.

Maybe they just had a blazing row in the carpark about who is doing the night feed, then up bounces happy cheery pg resturant worker 'oh lets have a look then' and dad is pissed off and sleep deprived, maybe not the nicest thing to say, but maybe he just wanted you to take his order and feckoff

oh VT - snaps re your post

My little Angel very swiftly becomes you little fucker (in my head of course) when my ds is being a little shit

Sleep deprivation was a form of torture you know, i have come out with the most ridiculous verbal diahorria when ds was a newborn

Sorry, off topic. Sycamoretree, when did you become vile?

ok back now so will reply as best i can.

Can totally see everyone's points about being sleep deprived etc, and having seen his wife possibly go through traumatic birth etc.

I certainly dont think i am against people referring to babies in a certain way and am sure once i have my little one i will no doubt refer to him/her with a fruity name. I've heard some funny things from my sister about her dc which have made me chuckle and can understand once babies been home for a week and been a pain.

I obviously didnt explain myself properly, they were on their way home from hospital and seeing as we are in a small restaurant its not hard to hear the conversation of wheres the moses basket etc etc. Also mum told me they were bringing baby home. I didnt put my face in the babies face i asked if i could have a look and commented on how cute he was but again can see some of your points about maybe they just wanted a meal in peace.

He was not a pleasant man and yes i only saw him for the space of 40 mins or so i agree, but for his wife to have to repeatedly ask him to leave it re complaining and apologise to me showed me that, maybe i judged and maybe im totally wrong. Perhaps he was tired, but the way he said the baby had been a little shit the last couple of days when baby had not even been home yet was what made me a bit perhaps combined with the fact he'd been rude to me was what had actually made me more .

As for being cheery pg worker yep thats me, and also thats my job to be cheery and greet people in a nice manner it's who I am. Also yes this is my first baby im not naive in thinking it will be a bed of roses. I didnt judge the family saying anything like oh they will make bad parents etc etc, i just said id felt and but as explained above perhaps that was combined with the manner in which he treated me and calling his baby a little shit. I only it as i didnt want to offend some of you.

So please dont jump on me its the 2nd time ive posted on aibi perhaps i should just carry on lurking.

Sycamoretree "We wouldn't say it to anyone but each other"

Exactly. You keep this sort of stuff between yourselves, and if you can't then it shows something of a lack of control to say it in public, to a stranger. Especially after only 4 days. What'll it be like after 10 days? 20 days? er, 90 days? still only 3 months in!!

Yes it's just a snapshot - but not a very nice one, and the OP is NBU (IMO) to not like that particular snapshot.

lol @ vt that did make me chuckle. I have it all to come.

It was a mad thread a while ago about being Smug...

A new poster went on a rant against...hmm, pretty much everyone on the thread!

I was one of the many she accused of being all kinds of hilarious colours of nastay.

Twas highly amusing. I kind of adopted it and reclaimed it as a badge of MN pride