To want to chat to friends without my hearing mumeeeeeee every few minutes?

[morethanjustmum]

I have 3 DC. My children are 6, 4 and 6 months. I love being with them but I am really starting to find it hard when I meet up with friends and the older 2 are constantly wanting my attention, climbing on etc. I feel like I can't have a chat because they want my attention. BTW when I am home with just them they are not like this.

I feel mean telling them to go and play constantly and have resorted to meeting friends out of our house as they are better this way.

Am I just a big meanie?

This is really getting me down.

bump

sorry wrong thread.

morethanjustmum - YANBU wanting this to be different - but only you can change it.

Carrot or stick...

Carrot: If you are at your house, bribe encourage them, tell them if they behave (explain what this means to you) while x is here then you can have 'whatever'/do 'something they enjoy' when x goes home. On the understanding that behaving definitely means no asking when x is going home

or

Stick: Tell them their behaviour is not acceptable, it is attention seeking, annoying and not something you want to see. Tell them that you will not put up with it and that xzy will happen when they behave in this way (xyz being sat on the naughty step/no tv that day/toy being removed - whatever suitable 'punishment' you normally do).

They are old enough to behave better, now you just need to let them know this is what you expect of them, pick carrot or stick and Job Done

I have a freind whose DD constantly battles for attention, I think lone child, lone mum means normally it is just the two of them so her DD not good at sharing mum. But mum made such a song and dance out of DD trying to get attention and trying to tell her not to interupt it would have been quicker for her just to answer the question and be done. Her dd is not so bad now she is older and Mum getting better at the I will be with you in 2 secs thing. Mine know I will just ignore them

chippingin I have tried the stick way with no joy.

bumsrush I think I am turning into a mum who is making a big deal of this.

I have had a really good think about it and I am going to just give them the attention they are asking for and see how that goes. I am also going to try and see friends with no DC in tow!

Its difficult to get a balance when there are three of them, start working with the 6 yr old encourage him to wait a moment till you finish the sentence or freind finishes their. thn turn to them and see what they want. If you say in a minute darling it has to be 2 minutes. But I would still say, can you let mummy talk to her freind just now, thankyou. And also set up the tvgames or actvities etc so they have stuff to do while you chat.

sorry i meant it has to be a minute not 10 minutes