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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To expect parents to keep their children home for 48 hours after a D&V bug?

31 replies

Marne · 11/06/2009 16:34

I know this has been said before but it really anoys me. One of dd's friends was sick at school and her mum sent her back to school the next day, now half the class have come down with it .

Now i am anxious that dd will get it as i suffer from sickness phobia.

If only parents kept their children home for the recommended 48 hours then these things wouldn't spread as fast.

AIBU?

OP posts:

julesisoneyearolder · 11/06/2009 16:37

not atall

i wouldnt send my dd1 back so soon after a d&v bug

sarah293 · 11/06/2009 16:43

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bellavita · 11/06/2009 16:45

There is a 48 hour rule at our primary school - from the last time you were sick/had loose stools.

YANBU.

Northernlurker · 11/06/2009 16:50

I think for parents who work outside the home, staying at home for 48 hours with a child who is perfectly well is very hard to justify - to themselves and to an employer.

TheCrackFox · 11/06/2009 16:52

YANBU.

DS2 is just getting over D and V and I have kept him at home for 48hrs. He is climbing the walls at the moment but I would hate to spread it around.

sarah293 · 11/06/2009 17:28

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Original poster

Marne · 11/06/2009 17:31

I know it can be hard if you work but its not fare to spread it around to others when you could just keep your child at home for 2 days.

Our school doesn't seem to care about the 48 hour rule and say 'send them back when they are well enough' . Dd's school is tiny (only 12 children per class/year) so if one gets something it soon spreads through out the school. So far this year dd1 has had 2 tummy bugs, 3 or 4 colds and has managed to miss out on chicken pox (she was the only one that didn't get it).

I can't imagine how bad it will be when swine flu hits the school.

OP posts:

junglist1 · 11/06/2009 17:40

One boy at my DS school vomited in the classroom, was sent home and yet there he was bright and early next morning. I said something to the mum and she just looked at me blankly. Wattless,no?

psychomum5 · 11/06/2009 17:44

I completely agree.

they seem to have no social conscience for those of us caring for children with immunity difficulties, let alone other parents who don;t want it either.

that said, I see it from the SAHM mums too....tis not confined to those who work.

the only thing it is confined to is the selfish ones IMVHO, and they can be anywhere!

corblimeymadam · 11/06/2009 17:49

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corblimeymadam · 11/06/2009 17:52

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JenniPenni · 11/06/2009 19:52

As a CM I have a 48 hour exclusion rule. Crucial for me and the other kids.

helsbels4 · 11/06/2009 19:59

Ooh, this one makes my blood boil too My ds was sick just once a few weeks ago on a Thursday morning and was begging to go back to school on the Friday but I told him that he wasn't allowed to and he was bored all day had a day relaxing but then the sister of a boy in his class the other day, had been complaining to her mum that she had tummy ache, didn't feel well etc then threw up that night and was in school again the next day!

I sarcastically said to the mum that maybe she had a tummy bug and the mum agreed with me and said, "Yeah probably but I can't have her under my feet again all day!" Grrrrrrr

GypsyMoth · 11/06/2009 20:05

It gets taken too far sometimes. I have a travel sick child and school insist be stays home for 48 hours after being sick on a journey!!! I can't reason with them! Admittedly it's not often that school and a sicky journey coincide, but when they do, it's bloody stupid.

Original poster

Marne · 11/06/2009 20:07

It always seems to be the mums that don't work that send their kids in (not the working ones), if dd is ill i keep her home for 3-4 days.

I wish the school were a bit more pushy with the 48 hour rule.

OP posts:

sarah293 · 12/06/2009 08:12

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newpup · 12/06/2009 08:24

Drives me mad too. Always the same mums here and they all work! Nothing against working mums it is just that at our school it is the mums who work that send in sick children because they do not want to take time off! Sorry if that offends anyone but it is true in the case of DDs class!!!

JenniPenni · 12/06/2009 08:44

'Its both. SAH's who don't want them 'under their feet all day' and WOH who don't want to take time off work.'

I agree with you Riven. I have both types of mums and it makes no difference.

I think parents who send their sick kids to school/CM need to realise that we are not nurses. One mum jokingly said to me 'you know more re first aid and looking after a sick child than I do, it's probably best she stay with you this avy', that might be the case, but is not how it should be (infection to the other kids and myself aside!).

The child wants mum and their bed and their comforts. As a CM I can offer more home comforts than a nursery but then my care toward the other children is less as I a taking care of the sick one more. This has happened a couple times as they have been ill, and mum and dad work far away and it might take them anything up to 2 hours to get to me.

The 48 hours rule really needs to be adhered to, it's irresponsible of parents not to adhere to it, for the sake of their child plus the other kids and teachers/CMs. Just so she/he doesn't have the inconvenience of looking after his/her own sick child?

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/06/2009 08:53

YANBU

its very annoying - S&D is awful and it does spread

i do blame the parents but kinda understand that if they have to work it can be hard BUT i blame the teachers more, esp if they know the child has been sick

they should send them home - but again i know of selfish parents who get a call from school and then say they are in london and wont be able to pick up till after lunch/school pick up and then the child stays with matron in sick bay all day till collection time

i have had a few temp jobs where i am called in to look after a child who normally goes to cm/nursery and then cant as have been sick - obv not everyone can do/afford this

if i know of a child who was sick and then saw them at school, i would have no hesitataion in saying to mum at school to take their child home

why should the rest of children/parents/carers suffer

sarah293 · 12/06/2009 10:19

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Original poster

Marne · 12/06/2009 10:35

Riven- sorry, i didn't mean that 'its only SAH parents that send their children in' but in this case the children that have been sent in are from homes where the parent/s don't work.

I am a SAHM and i keep my children home if they are ill.

Another one of dd's friends has come down with the bug and i'm so anxious that dd1 will get it, dh is working late tonight so i (being a wimp) have asked my mum to come over (just in case dd1 is ill) My phobia of sickness is so bad that i go into meltdown mode if one of the dd's are slightly ill. I know its only a sick bug but i find it really hard to deal with which is why i get angry at people sending their kids to school when they are still ill.

OP posts:

sarah293 · 12/06/2009 10:39

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Original poster

Marne · 12/06/2009 10:48

It must be really hard for you Raven, the last thing you need is your dd getting a bug on top of all her other problems. I think dd1 has a low immune system due to her Aspergers and poor eating, this year has been a night-mare, she rarely picks up stomach bugs but had 2 within a few weeks, she's also had cold after cold this year which i can handle but it starts to get dd1 down after a while.

A little boy in dd1's class (who came down with it last night) seems to pick everything up, this could be due to the fact he never went to a playgroup/nursery before starting school so hasn't built up his immune system, i feel so sorry for him and his mum as he's always ill.

I know kids need to have bugs to build up immunity but this first year at school has just been a night-mare for illness, in October the school almost closed as over half the school had a d&v bug.

OP posts:

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/06/2009 11:58

agree must be hard for you riven

we have a little boy in year 4 who has leukemia and his immune system is very weak

we often get letters reminding us that if you think your child may have/has been in contact with cp to inform the school

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 12/06/2009 12:08

Our school only has a 24 hr policy so must admit I would send back sooner than 48 hours but not as soon as the parents in the OP.

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