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Original poster

To remove the toy baby feeding bottle from my dd's new doll bath and feeding set?

1001 replies

Springfleurs · 30/05/2009 15:23

I was brought up to think that breast feeding was a strange and rather disgusting thing to do.

Luckily managed to overcome this myself and b/f both dc for 5 months and 14 months respectively.

Took dd to a toy shop today and she chose a doll bath and feeding set. Unpacked it for her when we got in and there is a feeding bottle in there. I know it might seem a bit precious but it irritated me slightly, as though it was a mandatory piece of equipment for all babies/dolls.

Or

I am taking it all rather too seriously?

OP posts:
LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:25

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Nancy66 · 31/05/2009 11:27

You realise your daughter won't actually have any memory of this toy and the bottle don't you?

Kimi · 31/05/2009 11:28

I am in no way saying bottle feeding is better, but it is not going to make a child poorly, stupid, or behind in any way.

Yes as a mammal and an upper primate at that, that is why we have these lumps of fat stuck to the front of our bodies, but I am sick of seeing people harping on and on about how bloody wonderful they are for doing it,
The midwife who tool my AN classes was a breast feed nazi and went on and on about it and tore in to anyone who was not going to nurse (including me) however she received a mouthful from DH for it as she never bothered to find out why I or anyone else was opting for the bottle. Un natural she called it!!
Ironic thing was she had no children of her own and was in a same sex relationship that she was quite open about, but she would not have liked that branded un natural!

oystersandcrackersinthesnow · 31/05/2009 11:29

So many things are being mixed up here! 'Normal' is not synonymous with 'good'. It's normal for human beings to walk upright on two feet but that doesn't mean someone is a bad person if they can't do that or even choose not to do that. BUT - if the thing that happens to be better for babies is NOT seen as normal, then that's not a good situation - that's the case at the moment with breastfeeding, it's barely seen as a normal way to feed a baby at all.

Ff being seen as the normal way to feed babies with bf as the 'alternative' choice for slightly weird hippy earth mothers is a BAD thing, even though ff for any individual mother can be a GOOD thing for that baby. That's because 'ff' and 'how ff is seen in society' are different things. I can criticise how ff is portrayed in society without it meaning that I think everyone who ff made a bad decision - they're different issues.

sunfleurs · 31/05/2009 11:29

Who can say Nancy? I remember my Mum and Dad's wedding and I was around 2.

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:30

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sunfleurs · 31/05/2009 11:31

Oh dear oh dear Kimi .

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:31

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violethill · 31/05/2009 11:35

'I feed my baby 23 hours a day despite 200 bouts of mastitis, nipples so cracked they are falling of.....I'm never ever going to leave my baby until s/he is 12 years old just in case s/he needs me...'

Yawn. This is competitive, living-your-life-through-your-baby syndrome at its worst.

Look, lots of us feed our babies breastmilk. Our babies are so clever they even know how to drink it from a cup or bottle as well as the breast. Our husbands are even cleverer - they know how to give the baby a cup or bottle. And us mummies are so clever we can go out and do other things outside the house without our babies attached to us.

Can we move on to some more intelligent debate, and can we also spare a thought for mothers who want to bf but can't? Because actually it's not helpful to them to be quoted statistics about how they are failing their babies. And actually, there are countless other variables which will have an impact on all these things too.

juuule · 31/05/2009 11:35

I was bottlefed, had dolls with bottles and breastfed my babies.

Sounds like you have had a rough ride with the breastfeeding, leonie. Well done for persevering in what you believe is right for your babies. I had 2 - 6weeks of cracks, bleeding and pain each time I fed a new baby. I've also had mastitis. I, too, thought it was worth it in the long-term. Fortunately things settled for me.

However, I do know how much pleasure some of my children have had with their dolls/teddies and toy bottles. They know there are different options for feeding infants. A bottle with the doll is a toy to be played with. And if anyone saw how some of my children are with their dolls (holding by the leg etc) and viewed it as how they would behave towards their babies when the were older then I don't think they would be allowed to have a baby never mind feed it.

LovelyTinOfSpam · 31/05/2009 11:36

whoah.

This just gets worse and worse.

Yesterday I was that people had moved the BF conversations up a notch by implying that you were only doing it properly if your child never ever had a bottle, and that those who had had EBM in a bottle were in some way experiencing inferior parenting.

I see that this is no longer being implied but said outright.

And double that children who have milk from a bottle, are runts. And experiencing substandard paretning.

You lot really need to get a grip.

Can you take your tits and your baby to work with you leonie? Most women don't have that luxury. And many have to work. And yet even if they express like a dervish so their baby can have BM while they are at work, if their baby is fed with a bottle this is substandard. Yet if it were done with a cup it would be OK. Very peculiar.

VH good to see you this morning still plugging away!

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:36

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StealthPolarBear · 31/05/2009 11:38

But juuule it is one source of information - why is it less important than the rest.
Nancy, really? You have no memories of being say 6 or 7? What about older siblings?
vh, I can't find the post you're talking about sorry as the thread is so big, sorry if that's the way you were made to feel, but I don't think mothers are better because they bf rather than ff (or ebm in your case I think - sorry if I'm wrong). I do think that bf as opposed to ff has health (and therefore financial) implications that on a population level are significant - more than disposable vs cloth, sling vs pram. In general I think people associate bottles with ff - probably not necessarily mothers but people in general. FOr that reason I think it is worth doing everything to ensure that bf is seen as the norm over ff. That's no judgement on women who either choose to or resort to ff.

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:38

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StealthPolarBear · 31/05/2009 11:39

LTOS refer me to the post where that is said outright please - I am obviously missing these

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:40

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StealthPolarBear · 31/05/2009 11:40

vh do you think no thought should be spared for the people who are yet to feed their babies and so want to know the statistics?

violethill · 31/05/2009 11:41

Yes, well some of us see having children and feeding them as a totally natural experience leonie - not 'hard work' as you do.

And I don't measure parenting on how many hours a day I am attached to a baby. God help the fathers of any mothers who embrace this obsessive approach.

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:41

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LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:43

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scottishmummy · 31/05/2009 11:43

liked this thread more when we were arguing about alphamum's and who da dick

the predictable turn of vitriolic personal attacks,and zealots squawking about ff is all together less amusing

back to the op - just a bottle.dont make such a disproportionate fuss

i had a toy hoover it didn't turn me into princess anthea turner (fortunately)

FruitynNutty · 31/05/2009 11:44

Thank you violethill, a thought might be an idea for us desperate mothers who cannot BF
Why is it no matter how many people tell me I'm not failing my baby and I "tried my best" there's always some idiot who has no idea what it's like. These people should be feeling extremely fortunate that they have been blessed to be able to BF their babies.

I have a friend who also couldn't BF her baby and had to use a bottle of expressed BM (in the beginning) as her baby has barely any muscle control She now has to be fed via a tube through her nose. Are you telling me they aren't normal?

Come on! We aren't all so perfect - much as we'd be desperate to be.

violethill · 31/05/2009 11:44

Don't try to turn this into a WOHM/SAHM issue leonie. As we've already said, it's perfectly possible to exclusively bf a child and go to work! And your priority as a parent can still be to raise your child!

LeonieSoSleepy · 31/05/2009 11:45

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Kimi · 31/05/2009 11:46

How is my last post offensive?

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