To be annoyed that the church creche leader gave all the children sweets yesterday

[punchinello]

I think they were haribo type sweets rings cola bottles red hearts bears etc etc. My children are 3.5 and 18 months. Dh says I'm making too much of it and has asked me not to talk to the lady concerned am I?

I thought it was terribly sad when DS was at playgroup that they were banned from taking sweets in for their friends on their birthdays because "parents had complained" The children loved taking in sweets and sharing them out (and lets face it sharing isnt a particularly easy concept at that age)

What they meant was "a few" parents had complained...fair enough you dont want your child to have sweets that is your perogative but I think the best way to deal with it is by teaching your children to say "no thank you" politely and ask that sweets arent given to them.

Once they develop taste buds they wont actually want to eat Haribos anyway...ive got a sweet tooth and even I think they are foul.

DS 1 now refuses a lolly pop when he goes to the hairdresser because he doesnt like them.

The more you ban things the more attractive they will be.

great post wilywom

Just because the few don't agree, why should the rest of normality go without?

You decide that you may not want your child to have the sweets but you are also deciding that others cannot have them either. Selfish IMO.

If you answer to that is that your chld will want them too, then i'm afraid that you have to deal with that, as it is your decision not to allow it.

Actually i am sure all of this has been said before earlier in the thread, but I am too lazy arsed to read right through so apologies if so.

I remember the subject of giving out sweets has been done before on mumsnet! So many ethical/religious/health issues involved.

IMO, the only problem when sweets are given out at school/preschool is when there aren't enough to go round! Sometimes ds will be the child to miss out on sweets and sees them given to other children. I feel for him, but these things happen sometimes. Although it was difficult one time when he cried all the way home at being left out.

Punchinello, I haven't read any of the other posts, so sorry if I am repeating anything, but unless you have serious concerns about your child occasionally having gelatine, e numbers or other stuff I would take your dh's attitude and just let it go.

I personally don't think it does any harm from time to time, but I don't have any ethical objections.

My MIL often runs Sunday school, she does it as a very generous gesture (I feel) She is 75 years old.
She would be horrified to know all this had been written about what she would perceive as a well meant offering.(if she were to do something similar, which is more than likely!)

I think that maybe it would be nice to give the sweets AFTER asking if the parents are happy with them...

or is that too radical!?

And i do find it strange to suggest that becuase the people are doing it on a voluntary basis it means that they can do what they like re the sweets etc.
can't remember who made the posts that said that... but it just seems to grate with me.

Anyway, i've bene here before and will prob be here again.

Wouldn't the world be lovely if the NORMAL and not normal people could live together in pervfect harmony, eating something that won't upset either of them?

Or do the meat eaters object to non gelatine based sweets?
is gelatine so improtant in one's diet?

YABU

It's a flippin sweet - given as a gesture of something good. You go to church - what happened to good will?

Worry about something important.

I think you have to take it for what it was-a kind gesture.

it is a lovely gesture- yes.
But it doesn't mean that you are happy wit the giving of the sweets.

A nicer gesture would have been to ask first, surely?

Won't get inot the religion issue, though

Children like sweets, and will eat sweets and as the old adage goes, everything in moderation. I cannot bear food nazis who stop their children having sweets/chocolate. If a child has a healthy diet, occasional treats don't hurt. The woman was making a kind gesture.

I'm not a food nazi- i don't stop my kids having sweets.
But on an ethical standpoint I don't buy gelatine sweets. My kids have never been given them from me- they don't eat meat either. Again another ethical point for me.

When my kids are old enough they can make their own decisions.
I talk with my ds1 who is 5.5yrs old about eating meat, he has said he'd like to try when he's older, but not now.
The 3yr old talks about it and says he doesn't want ot eat meat hust now.

So why should it be that it is ok for somebody to just give my kids meat based food without asking me?

I totally accpet that other people have differnet opinions and, as somebody said, are "normal"
Butwhy do my beliefs get no understanding and respect?

I#m not saying no sweets. I'm saying please check that children can eat the things that you are offerring.

is that too much to ask?

I think it's good to check re. allergies/veggies etc., but unless you generally feed you children a bad diet, I wouldn't bother - in fact I think it's nice that someone wants to treat your children...remember how nice it was to get an unexpected treat when you were a child? I would not want to deprive my kids of that!