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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think all 9 - 11 year old girls are horrid

23 replies

TangoFango · 20/04/2009 11:05

One of dd's best mates said to her "Don't take offense, but I think if you don't have your ears pierced you're ugly".

This mate, knows dd does not have her ears pierced. Dd said nothing back and had said nothing to initiate this statement of what is ugly and what is not.

Let them battle it out at school. Poor teachers.

OP posts:
duchesse · 20/04/2009 11:17

Some are unpleasant, but my daughters and their friends have been delightful at this age. But they were more in to climbing trees and pretend play than being mini-women.

I think many children are encouraged to grow up inappropriately fast, watching inappropriate soaps and generally think that being bitchy is the "adult" way to behave.

foofi · 20/04/2009 11:19

YANBU - but YABU if you think they are horrid only between those ages - surely they continue to get all the more horrid for many years to come.

MerryPonymum · 20/04/2009 11:20

They are sharpening up their tools ready to become fully-fledged vipers on MN in a few years' time.

ingles2 · 20/04/2009 11:21

just little sweeping statement then

MillyR · 20/04/2009 11:23

I do think it is related to upbringing; mean, superficial parents turn out mean, superficial children. There are lots of kind and pleasant 9-11 year olds.

pointydog · 20/04/2009 11:23

no more horrid than 9-11 year old boys or anyone of any other age

SparklingSarah · 20/04/2009 11:31

yep nasty little whelps!
can you just lower the age bracket to 7 though please

right now we have .....

oooo why is your mum white? where is your dad?
why have you got curly hair?
oo your brother is white

you are too old to play with dolls
I put my toys in the bin
brown bread is GROSS
you are GROSS
blue is a stupid bedroom colour
ham is gross
you shouldn't eat those crisps
Ballet is babyish

and after I told her she'd be mostly leaving my home your mum is HORRIBLE
FANTASTIC my work here is done!

yea a bit umbrella ish but nice to de chest ;)
tired of wiping tears bratfink saiiiiiiiiiiiiid

Juxal · 20/04/2009 11:35

Some girls are horrid from much younger than that! DD has been on the receiving end of nastiness from a couple of girls since year 2. At about 9/10 they are beginning to deal with hormones etc so they're all feeling insecure and that leads to stupid and thoughtless remarks (at best).

mumto2andnomore · 20/04/2009 13:35

Mine is lovely with her friends, can be very stroppy with mum and dad though !

saint2shoes · 20/04/2009 13:36

all??

psychomum5 · 20/04/2009 13:38

they're not all horrid.

or at least, they all can be, but not all of the time.

sometimes they can be quite lovely

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 20/04/2009 13:39

YANBU - I have a 9 and an 11 year old. They are lovely, and so are (nearly) all their friends.
And the one that wasn't is not a friend any more.

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 20/04/2009 13:39

Oh bother I meant YABVU not YANBU.

OrmIrian · 20/04/2009 13:40

I spent an hour or so out for a meal with 5 9 and 10yr old girls and they were charming. So no, they aren't all horrible.

Grumpyoldcaaaaaaaa · 20/04/2009 13:41

My 11 year old is lovely and all her friends are lovely.

Hassled · 20/04/2009 13:45

pointydog - no, I really think boys are just so much more straightforward. They fall out, they move on and get over it. (They might hit each other along the way, admittedly.) Prepubescent girls do the whole verbal bullying, bitching, backstabbing thing which boys seldom go for.

My DD had a wretched time at school at that age - appalling "you're not my friend" type stuff, and she was miserable. But then she'd let slip what she'd said to them and I would be mortfified - she certainly gave as good as she got.

mumoverseas · 20/04/2009 13:49

agree with foofi, mine is 12 and is horrid and in fact seems to be getting worse the last 2 years. probably why I sent her to boarding school

Sassybeast · 20/04/2009 13:51

YABVU. I know some lovely 9-11 year old girls.

piscesmoon · 20/04/2009 13:54

I know lots of delightful ones. Human nature is the same at any age, you always get the unpleasant.

Original poster
TangoFango · 20/04/2009 14:08

Well can you all send the delightful ones over here to play in future.

Grumpyoldcaaaaaaaa that's just it, I'd rather hope mine are horrid at home and nice in other people's company. My MIL tells me all her friends think my 2 are delightful.

OP posts:
Gmarksthespot · 20/04/2009 14:16

My 10yo dd is lovely. She can be a bit moody like her mum but she is thoughtful and kind.

I read once a week with different reading groups in her class so a variety of girls and boys. They are all brilliant and I have a great time each week. I usually don't want to leave.

So to answer op - yabu and not all 9-11yo's are horrid.

screamingabdab · 20/04/2009 14:19

Hmm, I think some girls are really clever at being lovely in front of other people's mums, but are very unkind to each other.

Original poster
TangoFango · 20/04/2009 14:22

yes some are nice but ATM not great, this is my other thread

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