to think it should be up to dd whether she wants to wear underwear at night?

[emkana]

dd1 went away over the weekend with a group. She was told by the leader of the group that she had to take her underwear off at night and just wear her pyjamas, even though that's not what she's used to doing at home. aibu to think that it should be up to dd?

(btw I am not going to complain )

YANBU.

Each night when I get DS (4) ready for bed I say 'Pants on or off?'. I can't imagine forcing him to take them off/keep them on!

I think female bits need to breathe at night? Could be wrong!

YANBU. I remember being told by the surgeon taking my tonsils out that my bra had to come off I am a 36DD when not breastfeeding and the answer was a resolute no, so I kept it on. DOn't know what they did while I was unconscious though How old is dd?

up to your dd, obviously

yanbu

totally up to her and i think i would mention it

she's 7

YANBU...and I'd definitely complain about it. How dare she/he??

yanbu, god what difference does it make to the leader?!!

Up to her and my mind is boggling that a situation arose where the leader felt the need to comment.

Maybe the woman is obsessed with hygiene and thought keeping on pants you've worn all day wasn't very nice... (I think she was wrong and interfering but am just trying to imagine what her reasons might have been.)

dd had a brilliant time and so I am grateful to the leader for her efforts and don't want to make a fuss, but I do find it baffling that she even cares.

Oh my take on that would be simply that the leader thinks female bits need to breathe at night and maybe it has not occurred to her that some people keep their underwear on at night and she thought she was just reminding your dd to take them off. TBH, it would not occur to me that people wear underwear under pjs (except menstruating women).

And fwiw, I think the surgeon maybe wanted your bra off littlelamb because it may have metal in it and you have to remove all metal on patients having operations. But I may have got the wrong end of the stick there....

lol when i had my operation the first thing they asked me was if i had taken my bra off .

they have to stick the wire things on your chest don't they during an op.

and yes it should be up to your daughter

DG, why do you have to remove all metal?

I am familiar with the concept, as have had to take off earings/watch etc, but why metal?

and what difference does it make if you don't? dh got all emotional once and inisted I keep my wedding/engagement rings on (i was off for a life saving op, so can see where he was coming form) and they just put a plaster over it. I always thought it was the hygiene/sterility issue, tbh

YANBU .It should not even have been an issue TBH .

oh, sorry, emkana, yes it should be your dd's choice what she wears to bed.

Can someone tell me how female bits breathe if you wear PJs...almost 40 and still can't work that out

They don't breathe. There's no lungs up there afaik

Silverfrog - the issue are hygiene, sterilty and safety. An anaesthetic means your vital signs have to be monitired and metal (in bras) can affect how the electrical current of your heart is read. Also, worst case scenario, if you needed resuscitating in theatre (think big metal paddles on your chest) wearing a bra with metal clips, underwires etc would mean that you would be fried.Littlelamb - your bra would have been removed in theatre and then replaced. Next time just do as they ask you to - they've seen it all before and worse

sasybeast, thanks

I get that bit, i was wondering at the "you have to remove all metals on patients having an op" bit.

Am familiar with why a bra would not be a good idea, but wondered if there was more behind the "remove all metals", as had only ever looked at it form hygiene perspective before, and it sounded as though there might be more to it than that (in cases other than bras)

*sassybeast (sorry, am crap typist)

My whole face is flushed at the thought
He was a fittie too

Skin breathes. Obviously not with lungs, but the common terminology is still to refer to skin "breathing". So moist, warm areas such as your crotch need exposure to the air in order to lessen your chances of developing an infection there. Well, I say "need" but obviously that is rather a strong word as so many of you clearly wear your underwear to bed and I take it you are not plagued by infections and fungal growths in your crotch. I really think the leader was only trying to be kind.

(I am not ignoring you silverfrog, I take it you got the answer you were looking for from sassybeast?)

Also when you have an operation they may need to use electrocautery, and having metal (eg underwired bras and bra hooks) in contact with the skin can increase the risk of burns.

I don't understand why anyone would want to wear undies to bed but I think the leader was a bit daft to insist on their removal!

I had no idea that people wore knickers to sleep in until I found mumsnet.