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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be angry at work colleague who opened an envelope addressed to me and had CONFIDENTIAL written on the envelope?

133 replies

johnbarrowmanlovesme · 28/02/2009 22:58

She knew it contained my recent job appraisal, which (she must have suspected!) did contain quite a few complaints about her! I wasn't in work the day the Secretary handed out the envelopes so she (my supervisor) was handed mine & asked to pass it on to me the following day.

Anyway,to cut a long story short, she handed me the envelope which for various reasons I suspected had been tampered with so I went to see the Secretary who was shocked that it wasn't her writing on the envelope
This person had taken the envelope home, opened it, read it then put it in a new envelope & tried to copy the original handwriting, I would never know
DH thinks this is a sackable offence, what do you think?

OP posts:
MaureenMLove · 28/02/2009 23:02

Jesus! Damn right its a sackable offence or a written warning at the VERY least. That is totally outrageous! Glad she saw some bad stuff about her though! I hope she's proud of herself.

TheCrackFox · 28/02/2009 23:02

YANBU

You need to complain about this to your manager. It is good that you have your secretary on board as a witness.

It could be a sackable offence "gross misconduct" but, in all honesty, that is up to your manager.

minouminou · 28/02/2009 23:05

Whoooooo....she's in the s**t.
Get that dealt with asap.

DeeBlindMice · 28/02/2009 23:07

She is way over the line.

wobbegong · 28/02/2009 23:08

Written warning I think, unless there's history, in which case sackable. That's my totally uninformed guess!

Just as a matter of interest, what were your "various reasons" for suspecting?

paolosgirl · 28/02/2009 23:08

Absolutely

Not sure if it's a sackable offence as it will depend on company policy, but definitely worthy of a formal complaint. Bloody hell.

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/02/2009 23:09

YANBU

it was your personal mail

sure it is illegal to open other peoples mail if not addressed to you (even if dh etc)

def sackable - tech she stole your property!!

report her at once and makes sure the secretart knows what you are doing

keep the envelope as evidence - if she denies it you can use a handwriting professional to say it is her handwriting

TheYearOfTheCat · 28/02/2009 23:09

Absolutely! If someone did this in our work they would be dismissed.

She has also possibly committed an offence under the Data Protection Act, as well forgery. It is clearly a breach of trust.

How do you know this chain of events occurred? Has she admitted to it?

trixymalixy · 28/02/2009 23:12

YANBU, that is ridiculous!

kickassangel · 28/02/2009 23:13

how do you know for sure she took it home, not just done quietly at work? i'd make a complaint, but keep to the exact facts that you know, absolutely no surmise. let her expelain how it was done. and keep the envelope etc as eve, ask the sec to back you up
but remember, whoever makes decisions about this, may leave you in the situation where you have to continue working together

steviesgirl · 28/02/2009 23:13

Did she really think that she'd get away with it? Does she think you're stupid and that you wouldn't notice? I really hope she gets the sack. That is bang out of order on her part.

Stupid woman obviously isn't very bright, and has shown herself right up. What a complete arsehole. She doesn't deserve her job.

thumbwitch · 28/02/2009 23:15

not sure if it's sackable, but certainly a warning is warranted!
Outrageous breach of confidentiality.

minouminou · 28/02/2009 23:15

Good advice, there, kickassangel
make sure the sec will back you up first, as she may not want to get involved

johnbarrowmanlovesme · 28/02/2009 23:15

Thing is, when I was speaking to the secretary, our (Top) boss came in & asked what waas going on then the Line Manager came to see what the commotion was all about so they already know about it & are going to call her into the office on Monday. Thing is ,we have no proof it was her that opened it. No other member of staff would have the slightest interest in my appraisal as they are in a totally different line of work to me and my supervisor. She came in that day & stupidly kept coming out with comments that had no relevance to what we were doing, just trying to justify herself because of what she had read IMO, but no proof.

It's a horrible situation to be in as I do want her to be in deep shit for what she has done but I have to work with the cow, just the two of us so it's going to be awkward. I could easily walk away but don't see why I should, the hours are perfect & fit in with DC, just don't want to speak to this auful person, let alone work with her

OP posts:
nomoreamover · 01/03/2009 08:47

gosh what an awful situation for you. Someone has most definately been out of order - but as you say its unlikely you can prove exactly who it was.

If the secretary is behind you then you could get this sorted however - after all if the secretary handed the letter to the supervisor personally then you can easily argue that its unlikely to have been anyone else.

Good luck - and don't back down. This is a total breach of your privacy -

Blondeshavemorefun · 01/03/2009 09:34

whoever wrote the envelope prob opened it

if you are serious about this, and so you should be

if she denies it then

i would make the firm pay for a writing anyalist(sp) and compare the writing of the accussed and on the envelope

tigermoth · 01/03/2009 10:06

What a horrible situation and you supervisor was way out of order, it seems. But do you now need to do anything else, if she is going to be called in to see her manager on Monday? It looks like the cat is out of the bag already?

She may keep her job with a warning. I know it will be difficult to work with her but conversely, do you really want to get her sacked in this present economic climate? Is she that awful (the answer could be yes).

I don't know what job you do, but how easy would she find it to get another job if she is sacked from this one? Only you know if she deserves this.

FWIW, years ago, I used to work with someone who was known to read people's email inboxes if they left their desk. She'd scan down to see if anything looked interesting, then open up the email and even print it off. Word soon got around our office and all of us made a point of switching off our emails whenever we left our desks. We decided this was preferable to reporting her, as she was nosy rather than nasty.

saymyname · 01/03/2009 10:11

Someone at DH's work was just got rid of for the same thing.

He hacked into someone's email to read their appraisal. He was on a probation period so they just ended it immediately.

YANBU.

kizzib · 01/03/2009 11:01

maybe you should start saying things like getting the police to check fingerprints/dna or something??

StealthPolarBear · 02/03/2009 10:40

what's happened today?

johnbarrowmanlovesme · 02/03/2009 11:12

Hi, thanks for all your replies, haven't had a chance to MN with dh & dc around yesterday.

Tigermoth, yes, she really is that auful. She intimidates people & is basically a bloody bully. We lost a really good member of staff recently because of her & I have complained about her verbally so my 1st appraisal was my chance to get it in writing & make sure that people that needed to read it, did so. This woman thinks she is above the law & probably doesn't think there is anything wrong with what she has done

But eventhough I don't know how I am going to work with her after this, I don't think I want her to get the sack. I think it's a sackable offence but I know she would struggle financially if she wasn't to get another job.

Then there is another twist to it, she is my neighbour. How good would that be to have to face her every day if she did end up leaving work i've just got to be strong about the whole thing & keep telling myself I haven't done anything wrong here.

They are meant to be calling her into the office today so I'm going to call in later to see what the outcome of it all was & whether to expect a mad woman on my doorstep ready to punch me I really feel sick about the whole thing.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 02/03/2009 11:18

Assuming she keeps her job, I would push for her (or you if prefereable) to be moved within the company. This woman is your line manager - the person who is meant to be trusted with anything confidential (illnesses, capability issues...) and I think you can fairly easily show that the trust has been broken.
Good luck!

iheartdusty · 02/03/2009 11:23

I would get a notebook ready and keep a diary. You have written down already what has happened so far in your MN posts, but I would copy those into your notebook and have it ready to refer to.
There may be a disciplinary process where you may be asked to give evidence. She could turn out to be a loon and shout at you outside work. In case anything happens, it always helps to have a record which was written at the time.

johnbarrowmanlovesme · 02/03/2009 11:24

thanks stealth, trouble is, there deffinatelty wouldn't be anything alse she could do. I could but I know there aren' t any positions available at the moment. It's difficult trying to explain to you without saying where I work

OP posts:
johnbarrowmanlovesme · 02/03/2009 11:29

That's a good idea iheartdusty, I already know she is a loon as is her husband. I know I'm going to be trying to avoid her later when I leave the house to go up to School in case she comes out of her house & bstarts intimidating me yet again

OP posts:
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