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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does your mother-in law do this? Or is mine just plain weird!!

74 replies

kelsuprise · 27/02/2009 12:25

My Mother-in Law sends cards (bithday, Fathers Day, Valentine, Xmas) to my DH from OUR DAUGHTER! Now I have lots of fun choosing cards for my DH from our DS (2 yrs old) but then it is really ruined by her doing the same! Am I being possessive or should this really be mine and my daughters thing to do and not hers??

OP posts:
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 27/02/2009 12:26

That is weird, inappropriate and VERY VERY annoying! I would be if I were you.

MmeLindt · 27/02/2009 12:27

She is being ridiculous.

Get your DH to have a word with her.

PlumBumMum · 27/02/2009 12:27

No thats silly thats your job

pollywobbledoodle · 27/02/2009 12:29

how very bizarre...

jumpingbeans · 27/02/2009 12:30

What a strange thing to do, I would tell her you want to do these things as you are right it is yours and your daughters thing to do. no wonder us mil get such shit,when you get things like this going on

MrsMerryHenry · 27/02/2009 12:30

What a weird thing to do. DH should definitely ask her about it - why not just send them with her own name on? Freakish behaviour.

lilacclaire · 27/02/2009 12:31

Thats your job, not hers, very strange, have you ever told her that you do this?

tearinghairout · 27/02/2009 12:32

It it is weird, but she obviously gets a lot of pleasure from choosing, too. I would think twice before pissing her off. Can't you just ignore them? What does DH think? - I bet they mean nothing to him, so does it matter?

purplemonkeydishwasher · 27/02/2009 12:34

she's an effing nutter.

Tinkerisdead · 27/02/2009 12:35

I'd be miffed at that, def your role. Mind you when it was my anniversary 4 weeks after DD was born, we had 3 cards "from her" with well meaning people making sure we'd had something from her. but then i had just given birth. Yours is far more intrusive.

Songbird · 27/02/2009 12:36

Yep, nutter!

lizziemun · 27/02/2009 12:41

Very odd. Your dh needs to ask her to stop.

The only thing my MIL does is take all her grandchildren out at christmas time to choose small presents from the children to the parents.

vanessa26 · 27/02/2009 12:44

I WOULD BE PEEVED, ITS YOURS AND YOUR DAUGHTERS JOB TO BE DOING THIS [SHOCK]

wotulookinat · 27/02/2009 12:47

That's a really strange thing for her to do. Have you ever spoken about it to her?

Original poster
kelsuprise · 27/02/2009 12:48

I'm glad that you all think it's weird- I was starting to think I was being touchy!! What would you do? I have told my DH and he just thinks she is being nice!!!??? Should I approach her? What should I say?

OP posts:
wotulookinat · 27/02/2009 12:50

I think you should say something. What's the next occassion coming up that she might do it for?

Tinkerisdead · 27/02/2009 12:51

if it was me, i'd wait until the next time and say, "oh ive already got a card from dd, she chose it/we chose it together, thankyou for thinking of it though" and handing it back.

Gorionine · 27/02/2009 12:51

very strange

franke · 27/02/2009 12:52

I would ignore it. Pretty soon you'll be able to get your dd to scribble draw something lovely on a card for your dh herself, rendering anything your mil comes up with redundant and a bit bonkers

debs40 · 27/02/2009 12:52

I think it is definitely odd but I think it would be very painful for her if you raise it and it might needlessly upset dh too.

It's a bit of silliness on her part but there's no real damage caused by it.

I would let her be and wait until your daughter is a little bit older. Then you can say very gently, and perfectly legitimately, that your little one will be making her own cards so there's no need to do that anymore

nailpolish · 27/02/2009 12:52

totally bizarre

id get my dh to have a word

EmmaBridgewater956 · 27/02/2009 12:53

Why don't you ask her if her MIL used to send cards from her own children and was that where she got the idea from?

That would make me cross....does she post it or present it in person?

Original poster
kelsuprise · 27/02/2009 12:53

The problem is she sends them in the post, so I can't even give the cards back to her. I suppose the next occasion will be Fathers Day?

OP posts:
nailpolish · 27/02/2009 12:54

drop into the conversation that dd has made a card already so there is no need for her to buy one

nailpolish · 27/02/2009 12:55

tbh id be annoyed on my dds behalf

your dd will soon be at the age where she will want to either make or choose her own cards

tell MIL she can help dd to make the cards or take her to the shop to buy one

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