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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed at a carer at toddler group?

16 replies

mel1981 · 20/01/2009 13:37

I took my son to toddler group this morning only his 2nd time.
Hes a typical boy crashing around, getting into mischief but not intentionally being nasty. Hes only 22 months.
A new person turned up today (think she was a grandparent def not kids mum) with a little girl that look the same age if not older as my DS.
Theres a playhouse and my DS kept banging the door open and shut so I kept telling him not to and he stopped. This other little girl then pulled so hard on the door that she banged her head on my DS was close but I saw that it was nothing to do with him and her carer glared at my son even tho everyone pointed out it was her.
Then the lady proceded to keep the girl away for my son and glare at me for the rest of the morning. Until my son DID bang the girls head with the door again (not on purpose). the girl was crying but there was no cuts or bruising. The carer then loudly announced it was time for them to go! I apologised and asked if she was alright to get ignored by the carer, I tried to get DS to apologise but he hasnt mastered saying sorry yet.

Im just a bit annoyed that she couldnt see it was an accident and it felt like she was making out im a bad mum and just singling out my son. The other kids were well behaved but still had the odd bump with each other thats what kids are like.

Sorry rant over!! LOL

OP posts:
Seeline · 20/01/2009 13:40

Poor you - it's always difficult when your LOs hurt others, even when it's an accident - it's even harder when they don't actually do anything but just get the blame!! I think it's best to try and ingnore it - when they are old enough to understand it never hurts to try and get a 'sorry' out of them. I think though that those with little girls never quite understand little boys!!

wotulookinat · 20/01/2009 13:45

You should have just glared back. Don't let her put you off the group.

Original poster
mel1981 · 20/01/2009 13:47

I know ive got two boys and they are just....boys running, jumping, getting into mischief. It really upsets me when people make out they are bad behaved just cause they play with more energy than some other kids.

OP posts:
wotulookinat · 20/01/2009 13:48

I just ignore other people when they try to insinuate that my DS is naughty - I know for a fact that he is certainly no angel, but is no monster either (well, not all of the time).

Dillydaydreamer · 20/01/2009 13:50

Take it with a pinch of salt- probably a childminder thinking of all the paperwork involved when a child gets hurt LOL It is especially what boys do! She was being very precious!!!
YANBU btw to be annoyed with her.

Dillydaydreamer · 20/01/2009 13:52

Seeline I do agree with you that people who just have girls don't always understand that little boys are boistrous!

muppetgirl · 20/01/2009 13:55

am starting tumble tots next week with ds 2 know as 'the biter' in the family.

takes a deep breath....

wotulookinat · 20/01/2009 13:55

We have 'spitty boy' at one of our groups. (not my DS, btw)

Original poster
mel1981 · 20/01/2009 13:56

Thanks I just take things to heart sometimes I guess- gotta learn to ignore it!
It was her 1st time there anyway, so mayb she wont turn up next week f she does i'll let it go over my head.

OP posts:
hambo · 20/01/2009 13:56

My wee boy is always beaten up by the girls at his group so not sure about the boys /girl thing!!

CrushWithEyeliner · 20/01/2009 13:57

spitting? really?

Original poster
mel1981 · 20/01/2009 13:58

I over heard one parent say her little girl bites, spits and hits - reassuring to know its not only my little one that is boistrous.
Thats what kids are like tho (to some extent) and I dont see hwy others dont see that too.

OP posts:
wotulookinat · 20/01/2009 13:58

yeah. He's a really horrid boy as well, and he is at least a year older than all the other kids. His mum is Spanish and pretends not to see what he does. (actually, her being Spanish is completely irrelevant!)

wotulookinat · 20/01/2009 13:59

biting and stuff is usually just a phase that passes in the end. It doesn't bother me, as long as the mother seems to be watching and makes an attempt to show the child it is wrong.

Original poster
mel1981 · 20/01/2009 14:04

LOL at the spanish comment thats something i'd say.
Theres too many parents who 'dont see' what their kids are up to. I know u cant watch them 24/7 but some parents see toddler group as 'their' time out cause theres someone else there to watch their kids.
All kids go through some sort of bad phase- mime have had theirs and will prob have more.

OP posts:
LadyPinkOfPinkerton · 20/01/2009 15:22

She maybe hasn't spent too much time at toddler groups and doesn't really know what they are like together in a group.

But poor you, don't let it affect you and your enjoyment of the group

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