AIBU to expect to find a "Parent and Child" space when I go to the supermarket?

[BikeRunSki]

I tend to shop at a huge Asda. We live in the countryside and it is our nearest supermarket.

Since DS was born 19 weeks ago, I guess I have been about 10 times. I always check out the Parent spaces and, so far, have never found one free. So I end up parking at the very far end of the car park where I can find two or three spaces together so I can open the car doors to get DS's car seat out and carry him miles to the shop. A lot of the time there have been cars in the P&C spaces that I suspect are not actually P&S cars (two seaters, sports cars with luggage all over the back seat).

On about half my visits there have not been any of those trolleys that I can put his car seat in either.

I have asked customer services if they could consider adding more P&C spaces or policing the existing ones. They have not been interested and have suggested that I shop at different times of day, although all my vists have been at different times of day! (well morning or afternoon, DS hasn't really got into 24hr shopping yet).

I would shop online, but they won't come to us.

The flip side is that our local economy is thriving as I can't be bothered with the big supermarkets any more. But they are handy for things like cans and breakfast cereal.

I'm sorry - when I read saint2shoes' post, I didn't read it as saying that her local sainsburys has one lot of parking spaces that are for both parent and child and disabled people - that wasn't clear to me.

If what she is saying is that she, as a disabled person, had to wait for one of these Parent/Child/Disabled spaces because some parents were using it, then I can understand her irritation - but it should be directed at the store, whereas her post seemed to suggest that the parents had no right to be using the space that she needed more than they did.

It does suggest that my idea of having some parking spaces that were for both catagories, as well as ones for each catagory, mightn't work as well as I first thought.

Stayingsunnygirl well duh.....dd was about 9 at the time, lifting her in and out of a car and putting her in a wheelchair is a lot harder than a new born baby(with 2 parents there) so yes my need was greater.

Yes, saint2shoes - I am not disputing that your need was greater - but how were those parents with the baby to know that you were going to come into the carpark and need that space?

As I've said, my earlier comment was based on the assumption that you were objecting to them using a parent and child parking space, not one that was for either parents with children or blue badge holders.

of vcourse they didn't know, It is the stupid store fault for making the bays the same, I posted because someone suggested it as a way to solve the "problem".
to me having a nt child it a doddle(i have one of them as well) compared to a lifelong disability.
I don't use that car park now as my large W.A.V does not fit under the barrier.

I was the one that suggested it as a way to solve the problem - I did suggest that this was only some of the spaces, but as I said a couple of posts back, your experience shows that my suggestion might well not work.

good, we can shake hands and be cyber friends again

I don't mind walking across the car park. I run 5-10k twice a week with the pram, exertion is not a problem. Opening my car doors in an ordinary parking space is though.

Incidentally, the first time I tried to post this, I went back to Threads I'm On, and couldn't find it - probably because I hadn't clicked on 'Post Message.'[senior moment emoticon]

The power to deflate people's tyres and relocate their cars to the furthest corner of the carpark?

Or make them suddenly crunch up like the advert for car tax dodgers!!!

Can I ask, is it acceptable to use P&C spaces when heavily pregnant? I feel guilty using them when I don't have my toddler with me but I really struggle to get out of the car in a normal space.

Will Mumsnet hunt me down?

How about parking 'badly' across two ordinary spaces, hungrierhippo? I can understand what you are saying, but I wouldn't use the P&C spaces in those circumstances.

I refuse to use P&T spaces on principle (cut nose off etc) for many of the reasons stated by others on here.

We have all major supermarkets where we live and I have NEVER had a problem getting a car seat out of a car.

The spaces are perhaps more of an issue when the DCs are old enough to open their own door and SLAM them wide against the car in the next space .

if there is no space, i tend to park end of rows where i can open my door wide open.

I had twins who were 5 months old when I passed my driving test. I ALWAYS parked far away from the supermarket doors, because to use the P&T space would have shown up my woeful parking

One would go in a backpack, then I would carry the other and sit in a trolley baby/toddler seat. It's not that hard.

People who are pregnant and complain about "feeling guilty", well I'd wager that if you felt that guilty you wouldn't use them?

breadandroses, you're right, I don't feel that guilty, especially when so many people in transit vans use them anyway!

I'm merely trying to ascertain what people feel is acceptable. For example, if some woman with a perfectly able bodied 4 year old saw me haul myself out of the car and waddle my way to the door would she have a right to chastise me?

Obviously there is a 'me first' mentality but there are obviously some people on here who have quite strong views on who takes priority, and who think they are somehow doing the world a favour by not using them (balloonslayer I don't understand at all!).

Either that or we all have far too much time on our hands.

Hungrierhippo - if I saw you doing that, without a child in tow, I would think that you shouldn't be using that space but wouldn't chastise you.

Yes the end of pregnancy is uncomfortable and cumbersome, but car parks aren't so big that you couldn't park in a quieter spot to get the space you need and then waddle just a bit further.

I'll consider myself told!

Although in my first pregnancy I was actually unable to walk due to SPD and ended up on crutches and eventually entirely housebound. But of course never went near a supermarket (unlike OP could get home delivery)

Funnily enough the people that insisted on helping me carry my basket and hobble on the few ill advised occasions I tried to get some groceries were almost always in a worse state than me. Usually very doddery elderly men or disabled people. Was eye opening.

Also we were shocked when boarding an aeroplane with a grouchy toddler and I was 7 months pregnant. When the flight was called first for disabled and those with young chldren crowds of able bodied twentysomethings barged families and old people out of their way to the front of the queue

The reason I don't use them is when I was struggling to have DCs after 3 MCs, and viewed Mums as the luckiest people in the world (as we are!), it irritated me quite profoundly to see people with children acting/treated as if they were suffering from a disability.

I swore to myself I would never use one of the spaces and I never have. I certainly do not consider I am doing the world a favour, it is something I do to amuse myself, and as I said am quite aware that I am cutting off my nose to spite my face, because yeah I do know that it's harder to shop with two toddlers than on your own.

And especially as I know the real reason supermarkets have the spaces is NOT because they think parents have a hard time, but because parents spend the most money in supermarkets and will go to the supermarket that makes their shopping experience easiest.

If people are concerned about the lack of availability of M&T spaces in their local supermarket, perhaps they should tot up how much they spend per month and write to the manager, copying the letter to head office, informing them that they are now taking your custom to another store and this is the amount of their personal business that will be lost.